She is losing hope.
She is losing the ability to believe that she could be happy. All she can think of when she lies awake at night is the person who hurt her. And she desperately wants to not become that person. She is fragile. She didn't used to be this way and seeing what she has become embarrasses her. She was confident and strong and she knew her worth. She was optimistic and excited and eager for a challenge. At least, she used to be. Annabeth Chase looks in the mirror and sees nothing but a shell. Annabeth Chase sees her empty grey eyes and lifeless blonde curls and knows this isn't how she was supposed to be. She was destined for greatness and it was her fate to be successful. He was never supposed to get to her this way. She was never supposed to let a boy take over her life and extinguish the fire within her. She's foolish. She's stupid. She deserves this. This kind of thing only happens to pathetic naive girls. She was supposed to be smarter than that.
Annabeth Chase lays down in her bed at night, alone with her thoughts and tears. Maybe she wasn't as smart as she thought she was.
xxx
It's been a month since she's released herself from him. She can't bring herself to say his name and even think about him. The sadness lingers but she's filled with mostly anger and hatred.
He doesn't deserve my anger. I am better than this. I am stronger than this. I am worth more than this.
The anger she felt taking over her body slowly dissolves. It's a minor success, but she takes it as a victory. She'll make it through this. She'll be the girl she used to be again. She'll show him and her friends and her family and herself that she is still Annabeth Chase. And she is not to be messed with.
xxx
Time heals all wounds. At least that's what Annabeth thought. It's three months later and she's beginning to cave. She misses him. Oh, gods, does she miss him. It's pathetic. She's pathetic. And she's stupid for thinking she would be okay. She can't be okay. She doesn't think she'll ever be okay. She's too broken. She's too shattered, she can never be fixed. Just look at her, a mess of tears and dirty tear stained clothes on the bathroom floor. She's crying over a boy who cheated on her, lied to her and took advantage of her. She shouldn't be crying over him. Especially not three months later. She's a weakling and she knows it. She's embarrassed and ashamed and she's stupid. So stupid. After all these stupid decisions she's made she's almost sure she doesn't deserve to be happy again. This is her punishment for her stupidity. If the hurt never stopped, well, she was almost positive that it was entirely her own fault.
xxx
The phone rang days later and it was Luke. He knew all the right things to say. He loved her, he missed her, he was sorry but he felt they needed time apart. When he asks her to come over she almost considers it but then it hits her. If he loved her, she wouldn't ever have had to gone through this. If he loved her, the other girls would have never happened. Or the lies. Or the sneaking around. She couldn't live her life always worried about Luke and his lies. And when he started to cry, all she could think about was how ugly of a crier he was. After she hung up the phone, she exhaled and sat down to breathe. The weight of him and his lies was gone. This is freedom and this is her chance to start over.
xxx
The apartment was pricey but so worth it. Her dad and her best friend Piper helped her pick it out. Just her style with a small balcony and a cozy brick fireplace. Only being 20, she had managed to find a good internship at a publication office and she was able to save up to move out of her small town and into Los Angeles. Seeing the skylines at night and being able to have a fresh start was perfect for her. She settles into her couch with a cup of tea and new book and finally feels herself ease. This was moving on. This was what she needed. She remembers the girl who cried on the bathroom floor and the girl who believed that nothing would get better. She thinks back and she's grateful and proud. She took and bad experience and she turned it around. She grew and she learned and she's even stronger now. A little more cautious, yes. But she's okay. She's finally okay. She sinks into her couch and smiles genuinely for the first time in months. But when there's a loud noise next door she jumps. Well, everything would be perfect if her next door neighbor could keep it down. She heard he's in a band and he looks it with his shaggy black hair and his too tight jeans. Mental note to self to leave him a note asking him to keep it down. Minor set back, but she'd learn to live with. She is Annabeth Chase after all.
Thank you for reading! I know it's very short but I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave me a review and tell me what you thought :)
I also just wanted to say that I'm super open to doing some prompts so if you wanna check out my tumblr ( xx-raen )and submit an prompt there I'd love to see what ideas you have!