Title: Chancing fate.
Author: Angel
A/N: This was a challenge for the BB. We were asked to Turn Aeryn Around – not emotionally, just get her back to John. This is my version. Hope you like it, as always reviews are appreciated. Oh, and FM love the stories that you write. Had to mention it here. *lol*
~~~
She was drifting, both in body and mind. She had cut the engines to the prowler once it was evident that she was out with communication and tracking range. Her thoughts were on instant replay. Had been since she had said those fateful words.
The memories unravelled themselves, scene by scene.
The coin cascading through the air. Hitting the deck first one way then the other. Neither of them looking down at first, just looking at one another. She saw the fear in his eyes, wondered if it was a reflection of her own. He broke the stare. He was the stronger of the two. His eyes lowered taking in the decision the coin had made. She knew then, knew without having to ask, to look. His eyes closed, his smile haunting. Had he known that he would lose to fate again?
She had expected him to say something, anything. For once he was lost for words. Just nodded in confirmation and backed out of the room, eyes still downcast not wanting to see what he had lost.
She had wanted to shout, order; command him to come back, to discuss what should be done next. She knew though. Their fate had been sealed by a coin toss.
She cursed out loud, her voice echoing in the prowler. She wanted to go back. She wanted to talk to him; reassure him that it would be ok. Tell him that his plan was as stupid as all the other plans he ever made. But she was a coward. Had asked him to make a promise that she knew he would keep, no matter how much it would destroy him. Destroy her.
When had she decided that they could be perfect again?
The kiss.
She licked her lips at the thought. Still tasted him there. That was her undoing. That kiss had made her realise how much her heart still ached for him. Still wanted him to be by her side. Still wanted to take the chance. But with the chance came the fear, the fear of losing him again.
Hadn't she already lost him? Was losing him this way better than waiting for him to die? If they were apart, she would never know. Never know if he would live or die. That couldn't be better. Not knowing.
She closed her eyes.
Hope.
She had taken away his hope.
By taking that away he had nothing to strive for, nothing to keep him going, nothing to keep him *alive*. Give it back and he would be complete. Would have goals.
Her mind warred with her heart, trying to weigh up the odds.
They wouldn't balance.
She would have to trade a part of herself for him. Trade her fear for his hope. A fair exchange.
She primed the engines. Fed the previous co-ordinates to the ship. Sat back and pushed the autopilot button.
And waited.
Thinking of their fates.
Fate couldn't handle this responsibility.
Sometimes it needed help.
Just like her.
Just like him.
How could they help each other if they were separated?
If he was going to die, it would be with her, at his side. She had allowed him to go alone before. She would not permit it a second time. She would not leave him to fight the battles of the universe alone.
She had been there, done that, and watched him die.
Watched him live.
She smiled.
Butch and Sundance. A team. A partnership.
She wanted that again, whatever the price, whatever the cost.
And maybe, just maybe, fate would give them the chance to get back to perfect.
She hoped for that. And she would pass that hope to him.
~~~fin~~~
(If only it could be that simple! :-) )
Author: Angel
A/N: This was a challenge for the BB. We were asked to Turn Aeryn Around – not emotionally, just get her back to John. This is my version. Hope you like it, as always reviews are appreciated. Oh, and FM love the stories that you write. Had to mention it here. *lol*
~~~
She was drifting, both in body and mind. She had cut the engines to the prowler once it was evident that she was out with communication and tracking range. Her thoughts were on instant replay. Had been since she had said those fateful words.
The memories unravelled themselves, scene by scene.
The coin cascading through the air. Hitting the deck first one way then the other. Neither of them looking down at first, just looking at one another. She saw the fear in his eyes, wondered if it was a reflection of her own. He broke the stare. He was the stronger of the two. His eyes lowered taking in the decision the coin had made. She knew then, knew without having to ask, to look. His eyes closed, his smile haunting. Had he known that he would lose to fate again?
She had expected him to say something, anything. For once he was lost for words. Just nodded in confirmation and backed out of the room, eyes still downcast not wanting to see what he had lost.
She had wanted to shout, order; command him to come back, to discuss what should be done next. She knew though. Their fate had been sealed by a coin toss.
She cursed out loud, her voice echoing in the prowler. She wanted to go back. She wanted to talk to him; reassure him that it would be ok. Tell him that his plan was as stupid as all the other plans he ever made. But she was a coward. Had asked him to make a promise that she knew he would keep, no matter how much it would destroy him. Destroy her.
When had she decided that they could be perfect again?
The kiss.
She licked her lips at the thought. Still tasted him there. That was her undoing. That kiss had made her realise how much her heart still ached for him. Still wanted him to be by her side. Still wanted to take the chance. But with the chance came the fear, the fear of losing him again.
Hadn't she already lost him? Was losing him this way better than waiting for him to die? If they were apart, she would never know. Never know if he would live or die. That couldn't be better. Not knowing.
She closed her eyes.
Hope.
She had taken away his hope.
By taking that away he had nothing to strive for, nothing to keep him going, nothing to keep him *alive*. Give it back and he would be complete. Would have goals.
Her mind warred with her heart, trying to weigh up the odds.
They wouldn't balance.
She would have to trade a part of herself for him. Trade her fear for his hope. A fair exchange.
She primed the engines. Fed the previous co-ordinates to the ship. Sat back and pushed the autopilot button.
And waited.
Thinking of their fates.
Fate couldn't handle this responsibility.
Sometimes it needed help.
Just like her.
Just like him.
How could they help each other if they were separated?
If he was going to die, it would be with her, at his side. She had allowed him to go alone before. She would not permit it a second time. She would not leave him to fight the battles of the universe alone.
She had been there, done that, and watched him die.
Watched him live.
She smiled.
Butch and Sundance. A team. A partnership.
She wanted that again, whatever the price, whatever the cost.
And maybe, just maybe, fate would give them the chance to get back to perfect.
She hoped for that. And she would pass that hope to him.
~~~fin~~~
(If only it could be that simple! :-) )