Emmett's thoughts.
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any thing that Stephenie Meyer wrote.
Summery: A little story about Emmett's thoughts on how people see him as a teddy bear. I got the idea based on a dear friend of mine and just ran with it
Emmett's POV.
Emmett Cullen's journal!
I was tired. I was sick and tired of everyone around me thinking I was nothing but a cute and cuddly teddy bear. I'm more than that! … I'm not a teddy bear, I'm a grizzly. A big mean and strong grizzly bear, I'm fierce and mean and … oh who am I kidding, I'm nothing to be big o' teddy. I can't change who I am but people should know that's not all that I am. I'm stronger than that, I'm better than that. Yeah, maybe I show my feelings and care about people more than most guys but that doesn't mean I'm not big and tough. I can take on anyone that wants to fight, even if I'd rather not fight with anyone. So what if I like to shop for all my friends more than I spend for myself? I care about the people I know and I want them to be happy, what's wrong with that? Nothing! … So why do I listen to all these people around me that say there is something wrong with who I am? I'm a caring kind of guy, I can't help it that's just who I am. I used to like who I am but now its like a trap. I'm stuck with who I am because I can't seem to change me. I don't want to really change me, I just don't want people to ONLY see me as this … girly-like teddy bear guy. Its not fun to deal with.
End journal entry.
"Emmett, what are you doing?" Rosalie said from the doorway as I quickly stuffed my journal into its hiding place.
"Nothing my beautiful Angel." I said innocently and rushed to her side then placed a soft kiss on her cheek, if only to see her smile.
She did smile, it was small but still there. "Fine, just hurry up! Alice wanted to leave ten minutes ago." She said before rushing off down the hall again.
I took a deep breath and exhaled it slowly, that was very close. No one in the house knew about my little journal, not even the physic pixie and the nosy mind reader. I love them all but people in this house are so meddlesome that its so hard to hide things. I've been able to hide this though, my special journal for all my troubles. I know, I know, what could Emmett Cullen possibly be troubled by? Well, things aren't always as they seem you know. YOU try being the big (and I mean giant sized) joker in the family. I have to make everything a joke around here or else everyone will actually have to deal with all the terrible things that happen to us. Imagine all of our lives without any comic relief … scary thought, isn't it? Well, anyway that's what I'm here for. Keeping everyone around me sane and adding a little laughter to everything horrible. That and to be in love with the world hottest girl ever! Sure the world just sees the cold and heartless side of her but they don't see what I see. I see the side that loves little kids and the side that is in love with me! I get to see the side of Rose that the world overlooks. She's an angel in disguise that only I get to reveal. … But not even Rose has seen my journal, she'd just think it was stupid and annoying.
"EMMETT!" Alice called, well yelled from the hallway. "If you are NOT down here in 5 seconds I'm going to crash your jeep into the grand cannon next week!"
"YOU most certainly will NOT," Rose called after her. "I worked my ass off on that jeep and you will not take your anger at my husband on MY hard work!"
"Calm down, calm down. I'm coming!" I yelled back as I walked down the hall and then I started chuckling to myself.
"Emmett, can you try to make your brain age with you?" Edward said as I walking into the living room.
Everyone was down stairs waiting for me in the living room. Edward had Bella (vampire-mother version aka the fun one) wrapped in his arms, Jasper was rubbing Alice's shoulders trying to calm her down, and Rose, my little Rosebud was waiting by the door. She was tapping her foot impatiently and most would have said she looked annoyed and irritated but all I saw was beauty.
"There you are! Damn Emm, how long were you going to keep us all waiting? Alice was about to blow up from all this hostility." Rose was complaining as I walked into the room.
"Sorry Babe, I was putting something away." I said honestly as I wrapped her in my arms and kissed her cheek softly.
"Come on lover boy, she can cuddle with your little wife when we all get back home." Jasper teased me while pushing every one else out the front door.
That's how it all starts, just a little comment. One comment leads to more and then teasing, pretty soon you start feeling like everyone is out to make fun of you. I can't be this cuddly bear guy that everyone now seems to think that I am but its who I am. I just want to get over all this and move on with my life. I want to be the big strong jokester that she fell in love with before she falls for someone else. I don't know what I'd do without my Little Rose. But I do know that it was time for me to MAN-up again. We were all going out for a fun night together. Nessie was hanging out with Jacob and the pack tonight so Bella and Edward could hang with us without having to worry about her but of course, they still worry. Bella has always and will always worry and that causes Edward to worry so it's a stupid cycle thing. … But whatever, that's off topic for what is going on here. We are all going to dinner, nothing fancy just hanging out and stuff. Should be fun as long as everyone stops with the teddy bear or cuddly comments, I don't think I could stand to listen to another one. I will flip out!
…
We all got to the diner and sat down in a big booth. We (meaning, Edward and Bella) didn't want to go very far so we stayed in Forks. It wasn't that bad since none of us would really be eating anything anyway. It honestly didn't matter where we went as long as we all went out together and had a fun night as a group. Simple and fun and hopefully, it would be. … Not promising anything though because my family likes to cause trouble for all of us.
"Who likes to cause trouble for all of US, Emm?" Edward asked in his condescending tone.
"It's not always my fault so don't even give me that tone!" I said defensively, although it kind of was hard to argue with him.
"We aren't out here to fight boys, remember that." Bella said simply as she placed her hand on Edward's hand, that instantly shut him up as he smiled down at her again.
"YEAH, we are here to have FUN, Fun, fun!" Alice said in her usually cheerful sing-song voice.
"I know, I know." I said while rolling my eyes. "I didn't mean anything by what I was thinking. Tell that one to stay out of my head and maybe we can all have some fun, fun, fun."
"If any of you start to break out into Rebecca Black then I'm leaving." Rose said stubbornly, she had grown tired of hearing that song the day it was first found in the house but I kind of think its pretty cool and very catchy; Its Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday!
"Thanks Rose, now I'll never get that song out of my head tonight!" Edward complained again about me and my thoughts. "That over grown lug you call a husband is acting just like teenage girl, all he thinks about is that song and that everyone here is making fun of him for something or other.
"That song is catchy and I do NOT have a teenage girl mind!" I said stubbornly and everyone started laughing at me.
I don't know what I'm going to do. I can't help the way I think and its not my fault everyone around me only sees the cuddly and cheerful side of me. What about the side that is fierce and powerful? Why can't everyone see the grizzly side of me anymore? Does it even exist anymore? … I'm sure it does, somewhere. Maybe it doesn't mean anything that they don't see that side of me anymore but it really bothers me. I'm not just some girly guy that watches movies and likes to sing cheery songs … I can fight and be tough and stuff! I can do manly things and be, be … I don't know. I can be tough and manly so what is their problem? Maybe the problem is me … but how do I fix me when I AM me? I just don't know what to do or if I should do anything at all. I need help!
Emmett's journal!
Nothing to say tonight other than had a great night with the family, apart from the mess with them all joking and teasing me again. I can't help who I am. I am me and that's not going to change.
End journal entry.