I Want

I want to tell you that you're brave. I've thought that since the first time I saw you, the way you stood there supposedly indifferent to what the world around you thought. The way you took my, a stranger's hand, when I offered to lead you where you wished to go.

I want to tell you that you're strong, and never let you doubt it. No one could stand against him like you did, for as long as you did. You never broke, no matter what he said.

I want to tell you that you're not alone. I'll be here. I'll show you the way, start you on the path to that big, and brilliant future you can't even see yet.

I want to tell you that you're safe, but I won't because I can't protect you everywhere.

I want to tell youthat you're funny. The first time you made a joke it shocked me so much I almost forgot to laugh, but the look on your face reminded me and I let the guffaws ring out.

I want to tell you that you're smart, not that I'm surprised. As if we should expect anything less from you.

I want to tell you that you're cute when you wrinkle your nose that way at something I say or do. No one else gets a nose wrinkle, only me.

I want to tell you that you're beautiful, and you always have been even though I'm blind enough to only have noticed it now. The way your eyes sparkle, even in the shade. The way your hair flashes golden-red in the sunlight. The way your lips move so that I lose the train of the conversation, I'm so caught up in watching them. The way you smile at me; no one else gets that smile. Only me, no matter how upset, how tired, how distracted you are. The way you, are you.

I want to tell you that you're not perfect because that's too much pressure. Perfect is so boring. There's no variety, no spice to life if everything is perfect. Even though you're not perfect, you're closer than any other being on the planet.

I want to tell you that I'm sorry. I should have seen the signs. I shouldn't have let them follow me. I should've worn my seatbelt. I should've known.

I want to tell you that it's not your fault. You share no blame in this, you couldn't even if you tried, and, no matter what you, or they may say or do, you never will.

I want to hold you I want to take you in my arms and rock you back and forth and promise everything will be ok, even though it won't, it can't be, not anymore.

I want to whisper in your ear and watch you blush as I breathe your name, the cool tendrils of air flitting across delicate skin.

I want to tell you that I love you, but you can't hear me anyway.