-Spoiler warning!-

Mentions a huge spoiler from chapter 216

Recap: This starts after chapter 218, once Johnny and Kanda have finally found Allen. Allen's wound from Kanda's sword back from the fight with Alma Karma is starting to cause a lot of problems. The Earl shows up and we meet Apocryphos, etc. Around the time Hoshino went on that never ending hiatus...

I found this rotting away on my hard drive after two years- I wrote this back when the manga was on hiatus and I was dying for a new chapter haha But I've started working on more chapters, so hopefully it can still be finished; I really enjoy writing on this.

Anyway, hope it's okay!

Johnny and Kanda held their breaths as the Millennium Earl's footsteps rumbled outside the small house. Johnny gripped Allen's arm tightly with trembling hands as he lay unconscious on the white sheets of a twin size bed. Kanda stood with his back to the door, holding onto the hilt of his sword with white knuckles and listening intently to the noise outside. Kanda was sure that the Millennium Earl had gone insane. He was ripping the town apart, searching for Allen with the intent of killing him. This much wasn't unusual, but the part where he kept calling Allen "Nea" was. And although a part of Allen was the Fourteenth, it seemed strange that the Millennium Earl would be trying to kill him when the Beansprout had mentioned that he was planning to use him as bait for Apocryphos. And besides all that, the Millennium Earl was just acting insane in general. He hated to admit it, but it terrified him.

When the pounding footsteps passed their street, Kanda glanced back at the back of the room where Johnny and Allen were. It crushed Kanda's heart to see the bean sprout like this, beaten to a pulp. Allen was the most kind hearted and loving person Kanda had ever met and he was always being positive and full of hope in the most dire of situations. He was also one of the strongest people he'd ever met and he'd always been willing to give up his own life for those of his friends. Allen, of all people, deserved so much better than what he'd been given. Kanda knew that he should be the one to suffer what Allen had, or really anyone else. Just not Allen. Kanda couldn't stand to see Allen in pain any longer.

Johnny placed his hand on Allen's cheek in a loving way and a concerned expression wrote itself across his face. "Kanda... how much more of this do you think Allen can take? Besides getting beat up like this, I mean. He must be in so much anguish right now, trying to fight to keep ownership of his own body day after day…."

Kanda stared at the ground. "That Bean Sprout can handle anything. I just hate to see him have to go through all of this."

"Yeah…." There was a long pause as they both pondered until Johnny spoke up again. "I remember when he first came to the Black Order."

Kanda chuckled. "Me too. He scared everyone half to death when we heard that he was cursed, including me. I nearly lopped his head off.

Johnny laughed as well. "Yeah, I remember that. I couldn't believe we finally found General Cross's letter on Komui's desk. I never would have imagined that

someone could recover something from that thing…."

He lifted the corner of his mouth in a smile. "I'd give anything to have a cursed fifteen year old as our biggest problem right now."

Johnny shrugged. "I can agree with you there. But, in a way, I guess it kind of is. Not him, of course, but the Fourteenth inside of him. Who would've guessed that there was another life waiting inside of Allen…. To think that Allen went through his entire life without knowing a thing about Nea. This whole thing is just terrible isn't it? I just hope that someday we'll be able to live in peace, even if only for a little while."

"The dream of every Exorcist," Kanda said.

After another few moments of silence, Johnny said, "Kanda? Why do you think Allen's wound is acting like that? And I remember his Innocence was having a similar reaction as well."

Kanda folded his arms. "I'm not sure. We'll have to ask him when he wakes up. But I know that it's causing him a great deal of pain. We'll have to do something about it to help the twerp keep his guard up against the Fourteenth."

"Yeah. I just hope that when he does wake up, it's Allen and not Nea."

Kanda nodded. He hated being so forceful with Allen when he would wake up, but none of them could know for certain whether it was Allen or Nea. It was an awkward position to be in, having to trust your friend but treat them like the enemy at the same time. "Well, in any case, we'd better move. I'm not usually one to run away from a fight, but we don't exactly have a choice; the Earl's lost it."

"I agree. And, no offense, but I don't think you'd be able to take on the Earl on your own."

Stepping away from the door, Kanda walked towards Allen and Johnny. "That's why we're leaving," he said in his usual monotone voice. He slid his arms beneath Allen's limp body and lifted him off the bed.

"Kanda, are you sure you don't need any help carrying him?" Johnny asked.

He made his way to the back of the room towards a back door with ease. "Anyone could carry this twig easily."

Johnny followed Kanda and Allen out the door as Kanda looked around nervously, keeping close to the wall of the alleyway. He held a finger to his lips, signaling Johnny to be quiet, then silently went the opposite direction that the Earl had gone. Kanda was incredibly quiet, his footsteps making absolutely no noise against the pavement. Johnny was having a hard time following Kanda's example and he'd cringe every time he made the slightest noise. He hoped that the Millennium Earl didn't have any super hearing they weren't aware of.

After a few minutes of tiptoeing through the winding pathways behind buildings, Kanda made a sound expressing his sudden irritation. Johnny nearly ran into him when Kanda stopped abruptly and set Allen down on the ground. He backed away, pushing Johnny back with his arm.

"He's waking up," he grumbled as he grasped the hilt of Mugen. "Don't get too close."

Johnny held his breath as he trained his eyes on Allen's peaceful face. After a few seconds, his face slightly contorted, surely from the wound in his stomach. His eyes slowly fluttered open and Kanda immediately unsheathed Mugen and pointed it straight at Allen's face.

"Nice to see you too, Ponytail," he said in a hoarse voice as the corners of his mouth lifted into a weak smile.

Relief washed over Johnny and he let out a deep sigh. "Phew, that's Allen for sure." He took a step towards Allen but was instantly held back by Kanda's arm.

"Don't be too sure, Johnny. As far as we know, the Fourteenth could have access to Allen's memories. There's no telling if that's the Bean Sprout or the Fourteenth."

Johnny's heart dropped as his excitement faded. "Oh," he breathed with disappointment. Allen's smile relaxed and his eyes wandered away from them, looking distraught. For a second, a part of Johnny hoped that it wasn't Allen. Allen didn't deserve to feel more pain, especially emotional pain. His own friends were treating him like the enemy; he didn't even want to imagine how awful that would feel.

"If you're the Fourteenth," Kanda said firmly to the boy lying on the ground, "listen to me. The moment you gain complete control over Allen, if you ever do, I'll slaughter you right then and there," he said in a deathly tone. "If I'm talking to Allen, then… just… hang in there. We'll find a way to give you control over your body again."

The boy stared up at him with empty eyes and despair coating his face. When Kanda finished speaking, he simply said, "I understand."

"Good." He hesitated as he kept his gaze on the boy and the expression on his face told Johnny that he was contemplating something. Finally, he said it. "I hate to do this, but it seems that our only option now is to take you back to the Order."

Johnny's eyes grew wide and his mouth fell open. "What?! Weren't we trying to avoid the Order?!"

Kanda folded his arms and closed his eyes. "We've been driven into a corner and we're stuck. The Millennium Earl is out to kill Nea and Allen, Apochryphos is on our tail as well, and Allen's on the verge of turning into a Noah. Right now, the Order is our best bet. It's a lot safer there."

"But Allen ran away from the Order to protect everyone! I don't think it's safe to go back there at all!"

Kanda shot him a sharp look and Johnny fell silent. What was Kanda thinking?! There was a chance that going back to the Black Order would keep the Earl and Apocryphos at bay, but it was highly unlikely. They would put everyone at the Order in danger if they went back! But Johnny knew that he couldn't argue with an Exorcist; Kanda looked like he was considering snapping his neck already.

Kanda turned to Allen. "What do you think?"

Allen looked taken aback. "Why are you asking me?"

"Just answer the question."

He pushed himself into a sitting position, grimacing and clutching his side. Then anger swept across Allen's face momentarily before he spoke. "I think you're insane, that's what I think. Johnny's right, I came here for a reason! I've been trying to hide and stay away from everyone, and then you showed up! I don't belong at the Order anymore!" His voice began to crack with emotion. "I care about you and everyone at the Order. You don't understand what it's like knowing that any second you could turn and kill the people you love the most. You don't know what it's like having someone's soul trying to take over your body! And I'm trying my best, I… I am! But if you take me back there… I…" Tears welled up in his eyes as his chin trembled, "I… I swear to you, I'll kill myself." He tore his gaze away from Kanda, trying unsuccessfully to hold back his tears. "If that's what I have to do protect everyone, I'll do it."

Johnny clutched the cuffs of his coat sleeves tightly as he stared at the ground, tears welling up in his own eyes. He didn't want to see anymore. He didn't want to hear anymore. He just wanted things to be normal again. He just wanted to see the cheerful Allen he used to know again. Despite knowing what Kanda might do and knowing that he could very well be the Fourteenth, Johnny walked up to Allen, fell to his knees, and wrapped his arms around his friend. He looked up at Kanda, who was only looking at him without any expression, and said, "I won't let you take him back, Kanda. I don't care if I'm not an Exorcist like you; I'm not moving from this spot."

Allen's eyes were wide with surprise, but he returned the embrace after a long moment of silence. It finally seemed that Allen could no longer suppress his festering emotions and he quietly sobbed into Johnny's shoulder, firmly clinging to the fabric of the scientist's clothing. It pained Johnny to imagine the loneliness and fear his friend must have had to have been feeling.

Staring at Allen, Kanda only stood there, watching him. After a few moments had passed, Allen settled down and he lightly placed his hand on Johnny's arm that was wrapped around Allen. "Johnny…."

"Get up, Johnny," Kanda said suddenly.

"Excuse me?"

"I said, get up. I-"

"No!" Johnny interrupted. "I told you, I won't let you take Allen to the Order!"

"John-"

"Just because you're an Exorcist, doesn't mean that you can-"

"JOHNNY!" Kanda shouted. "Stand up! I'm not taking anyone to the Order!"

He stared up at him in bewilderment. "What are you-"

"It was a test!" he admitted. "I was testing to see whether this is the real Allen or not!"

Silence fell upon the three of them. "A… test?" Allen asked?

"Yeah."

"…."

"YOU SICK BASTARD!" Allen yelled abruptly. "WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, MESSING WITH ME LIKE THAT?! YOU MADE ME CRY!"

"WELL MAYBE IF YOU HADN'T GOTTEN YOURSELF INTO THIS MESS, I WOULDN'T HAVE TO GO TO SUCH EXTREME MEASURES!"

"GOTTEN MYSELF INTO THIS?! YOU THINK I HAD A SAY IN IT?!"

"BOTH OF YOU, QUIT IT!" Johnny shouted over them.

"But-"

"I SAID, SHUT IT!" Johnny took a deep breath. "Kanda…" Johnny was obviously trying very hard to hide his irritation and anger as he composed himself. "Continue."

Both Allen and Kanda stared at him. None of them had ever seen Johnny yell over them like that before. Embarrassed, Johnny made a motion with his hand, gesturing Kanda to continue.

"Well, uh, it seemed to me that if you," he gestured to Allen, "were the Fourteenth, he'd take the opportunity to use the Black Order and the Exorcists as added protection. I knew that if it was really you, you'd refuse to put everyone in danger."

"Oh, I see," Allen said. He scratched his head. "Uh, that was good thinking. That's a little embarrassing, though, after saying the things I did…. I, uh…."

Johnny squeezed Allen in his arms. "There's absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, Allen! I'm glad you feel that way about us!"

He made little effort to grin. "Yeah, I suppose…." A sudden shock of pain pulsed in his abdomen and he keeled over against Johnny, gritting his teeth. Johnny softened his hold on him and rested a hand on his back with worried eyes staring down at him through his huge glasses.

"We'd better quit lingering around here," Kanda said, trying unsuccessfully to hide his concern for Allen behind his cold demeanor. "The Earl will sniff us out before too long."

Johnny faced Kanda and said, "I agree, but… it just seems too farfetched, thinking that we can outrun him, especially with Allen in this condition. We need to come up with a plan."

Beneath his hand, Johnny could feel Allen chuckling to himself. Johnny stared at him with furrowed eyebrows. "Allen? Are you alright?" Was he losing it?

"I-I'm sorry," Allen said through a grin as he put a hand over his face, "I just think it's funny, that you two are still putting your lives on the line for me."

Anger swirled up inside of Johnny as he glared at Allen. "How is that funny, Allen?!"

"I could be moments away from being the enemy who'll try to kill both of you. I am the Noah of Destruction; I'm hardly Allen at all anymore…. I constantly feel myself slipping and I-I know… I know that if I let go for too long, if I give in for just a moment… I'll…." Johnny watched as tears began to roll off his cheeks onto the cobblestone.

Kanda stepped closer to the two kneeling on the street and crouched down next to them. Lifting Allen's chin with his hand, he looked into Allen's pained eyes. "You want to know why, Bean Sprout? Because we care about you. I don't give a damn who's in here," he said, flicking Allen's forehead, "We're putting our lives on the line for the one in here." He moved his hand downward and rested it on Allen's chest. "And if we do end up getting killed by the Fourteenth, then so be it; we won't let you go through this alone."

Allen's chin quivered as tears kept welling up in his eyes. He relaxed and leaned his head forward on Kanda's shoulder, holding the wrist of Kanda's hand that was being held over Allen's chest, sobbing. "Stupid Kanda," he said through his tears. "You've still got people who care about you. Lavi, Krory, Miranda, and… and Lenalee…. You need to go back to them, both of you." He lifted his head up to look at Kanda. "Whether I'm alone or not doesn't matter now! This is real! All of it! If you die for something as pathetic as me, others could die…. Our friends! They need you. So, both of you, just get out of here. I won't let you carry me any further!"

"They have each other, Allen." Johnny interrupted. "They can handle themselves! We're needed most right here, with you, and there's nothing you can do to make us leave!"

It went silent until the quiet pattering of rain against stone surrounded the three. "Alright. Do what you want," Allen whispered, looking away from the two to conceal his tears. "Something tells me that I would probably do the same if I were in your position." Turning his gaze back to Kanda, a deathly seriousness found its way into his voice. "But the moment Nea takes over, the moment you see the slightest hint that he has complete and permanent control over me, run. Don't try to fight me, just run. Please…."

Kanda nodded. "Deal."