Chapter 1

BPOV

"Dad?" I asked.

"Yeah, Bells?" he answered. He sounded distracted, the game must be on.

"Jake is coming to pick me up. There is a bonfire on the reservation. If, you don't hear me by 12, just go to bed, so you don't have to wait up for me."

"Kay Bell"

Me and Jake are like brother and sister in my eyes. If only we lived together… I sighed.

I never really think of his name. It still sent me wrapping my arms around my torso. I cringed. We spent everyday together. On vacation, even this week – spring vacation – I would be out late with Jake just hanging out. Although Charlie sometimes got annoyed waiting up for me, but he rather inhale water than drink it; he was just happy to see me happy… or in my case, normal.

I was finishing cleaning the bathroom upstairs when I heard a honk outside. I shoved the sponge under the sink and dumped the bucket of soapy water into the shower. I shoved that under the sink and almost fell on my face near the bottom of the stairs. I looked out the window; from this distance I could see Jake's breath while he leaned out of his Rabbit. I quickly grabbed my coat and shoved on my boots.

"Bye!" I yelled, while pulling the door closed.

The night was dry, but chilly. You could see your breath, so much for May or in this case spring vacation. It was going to be just another cold week in dreary old Fork, Washington. I sighed.

I patted my pockets to make sure I had my cell phone just in case and climbed into Jake's car.

"Hey, Bells" he said yawning.

"Jake…" I moaned. He didn't sleep last night. "What time are we leaving?"

"We have to be there at eight" he said sleepily.

It was only 6. "You're taking a nap before we go, you know. Or I will throw a fit."

"Please no fits!" he smiled. I couldn't help but smile. With Jake, your always happy.

"Anything new?" he asked, making conversation.

"Since last night…? Nope," I smiled and he chuckled.

Jake pulled in near his house.

"Thanks for picking me up," I half smiled.

"Yep," he yawned.

It was dark, but not enough to see the stars. I opened my door and the cool brisk air made me shiver. He took my hand to walk through the dark. He walked straight while, I tripped and stubbed my foot a few times. He laughed at how clumsy I was. I grimaced.

Billy's house was small but cozy. It was like all one big room, however separated by the couch, counter and table. Except for the hallway where the bedrooms were. He wasn't there; probably setting up for tonight's meeting.

Jake led me to the couch. He laid down and pulled me on top of him so my head was on his chest. He flicked on his old TV and watched about three commercials and yawned once more and after that, he was snoring.

As I watched him sleep, I thought of how peaceful it was to sleep; to just get away from everything, all the stress, for just a few hours. That is ifyou were anyone but me. I have nightmares. In my life there were no such things as good dreams. In my dreams you scream until you wake up and realize what's happening. You realize that you feel like clawing your heart out or killing yourself because the images that fill your head, hate you, and you hate it. I knew Jake worried about me, but he had more than enough stress on his shoulders as it was.

I never talked about my dreams with anyone. Even to Jake; even Charlie. I wouldn't. I couldn't worry them more than they were already worried about me. Charlie still heard me scream and I was sorry terribly, without a doubt sorry that I did this to him. Some day, somehow I would repay him for everything that he put up with when I was like this.

Even though, Jake was like my 'sun' in some cases, He still did things to annoy the hell out of me. But that sun always would shine brightly in my world. He made everything bright, a clear outlook. He was my best friend, and I loved him that much; nothing more and nothing less.

I stopped thinking, so I could get distracted by a show that was now playing. The bright screen with many flashy colors filled the dark room. All shades of the rainbow flashed across us on the couch. I just watched, trying to study the body language of the woman on the show and how fake she looked when looking at the camera. It was like she was 'fake acting'. Funny how that describes me, because I fake act all the time; I try to smile when I'm sad. I try to look like I'm decent when all I want to do is to curl into bed and never get out. I fake act every damn day. I can't believe Charlie didn't notice, since I was such a bad liar. Hey, maybe the tables were turning and I was getting better at lying… maybe only to others, however I still couldn't fool myself.

I watched the time carefully. I woke Jake up at 7:30, more than enough time to drive to the bonfire.

"Hey" He murmured sleepily.

"Come on, sleepy. We're going to be late".

He went to get another coat for m, knowing I would need it and apart from the fact that the wind was harsher on the cliff. In the end, Jake had been right – even though he wore absolutely nothing… Even with my parka and his I was freezing. Jake had to wrap his long arms around me.

When we got here, we were greeted by the wolf pack. Quil yelled "Hey Clumsy!" And Embry hugged me. Sam and Emily smiled and murmured hello's.

I sat on one of the four tree trunks cut in half so its flat side was on the cold frozen ground. I picked up a random twig and started to draw hearts and sketching odd lines. I quickly realized what the odd shapes were conjoining into. It spelled out, J-A-C-O – I quickly erased it before anyone could see my artwork.

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Comment or tell me what you think... Chapter 2 coming VERY soon!