Talkshow with Cloud, Sephiroth, Kadaj, Yuffie and Vincent
Htaed: We're back again pplz, and this time, Danja's my-
-Danja walks in-
Htaed: YODAAAAA!!!
Danja: AAANGST!!!
Htaed: YODAAAA!!!
Danja: AAANGST!!!
Htaed: YO-
Grimm: SHUT UP!! God, are you going to call them in, or what?
Danja: -raises hand- Question!
Grimm: …what?
Danja: What happens if we pick 'or what'?
Htaed: -rolls eyes- Obviously, Grimm will eat us. Duh.
Danja: WTF?!
Htaed: -shrugs- Well, he did eat Kisame last time…
Danja: O.o
Htaed: No, seriously. Ask Alii.
Danja: That is…highly…
Grimm: Irrelevant?
Htaed: Interesting?
Danja: We'll go with that. Mental note: call Alii later…
Htaed: 'Kay, well, I think we should call them in now…
Danja: Probably should…
Htaed: Probably…
Danja: Yeah…
Htaed: Yeah…
Grimm: Just do it already.
Htaed & Danja: COME ON IN!!
-Sephiroth and Yuffie walk in-
Htaed: WTF?! Where's everybody else?!
Danja: -sees Sephiroth- CREEEEEEEEEPERRRR!!!
Htaed: -swats Danja- Quiet, you. Now go get all the angsty brooders.
Yuffie: -laughs-
Danja: Do I have to?
Htaed: -shuffles random blank papers like a news host- Yes.
Danja: Make Grimm do it.
Htaed: -doesn't even blink- Grimm, go get the angsty brooders.
Grimm: -sighs- Fine.
-Grimm disappears backstage-
Grimm: OMFG!! THEY TURNED THE ENTIRE BACKSTAGE INTO AN EMO CORNER!!! –runs back onstage-
Htaed: -rolls eyes- It's Halloween, moron. We spent all morning decorating.
Cameraman: -muttered- More like we decorated, and you and Danja threw streamers and cobwebs and paper and junk at each other and everybody else.
Htaed: -ignoring Cameraman, addressing Grimm- Now go get them, you wuss.
Grimm: I ain't going back there again!
Htaed: Fine. –picks up mike- ATTENTION! ALL SOLDIERS, VAMPIRES CHYSALISES AND REMNANTS HAD BETTER GET THEIR ASSES UP FRONT NOW OR THERE WILL BE PAIN!!
Zack: Heya!
Htaed: WTF?! What are you doing here?! You died!! And you weren't invited! How'd you get in?!
Zack: Back door.
Htaed: Gotta start locking that thing…I'm getting all sorts of unexpected guests…
Danja: ZACK!! –glomps-
Htaed: -pries Danja off Zack w/crowbar- Leave the poor dork alone.
Zack: Dork?
Htaed: -sighs- It's from a picture, man. We still love you. Especially Danja.
Zack: Why especially her?
Htaed: 'Cause she cried when you died.
Danja: So? You did too!
Htaed: So? We all know I cried then. I also cried after Godchild, and after Wolf's Rain, and when Sephiroth died.
Danja: You cried when creeper died?!
Zack: You cried when Sephiroth died?!
Cloud: -has finally walked in, along with Vincent and Kadaj- Who cried when Sephiroth died?!
Yuffie: -points at Htaed- She did.
Vincent: …………phone……………….
Htaed: -jumps about five feet in the air as Vincnet is right behind her- Jeezus, man, you scared the bejeezus outta me! And how come you still don't have a phone? You can buy them at freaking everywhere!
Sephiroth: I died?
Cloud: Yes, you evil bastard, I killed you. Twice.
Sephiroth: I got to die twice? Cool. You cried when I died?
Htaed: Yup. –is proud-
All except Htaed & Seph: You're a freak.
Htaed: Why, thank you. –is proud-
Kadaj: How come nobody cried when I died? –sniffle-
Htaed: Awwwwwww…C'mere frightening emo child, I'mma give you a hug. Danja, group hug with the emo child! –hugs-
Danja: Awwww….I cried when you died, Cabbage! –hugs-
Kadaj: Cabbage?
Danja: Oh, yeah, everybody has nicknames. We had fun doing it.
Htaed: 'Kay, so I'mma list them off. Cabbage, Yahoo! Log and Sephy-kins are the SHM. Also known as Kadaj, Yazoo, Loz and Sephiroth. Cloud is also known as Chocobo-head, Angst Queen, Chocobo, Broody, Blondie, Spike, etc, etc…
Cloud: All those are me?
Danja: Yep. And that's not even the half.
Htaed: -continues without pause- Vincent is widely regarded as a vampire, Zack is called a dork and a puppy, Yuffie curiously doesn't have any, and I can't think of any more off the top of my head.
Yuffie: I don't have any? Aww, that sucks.
Danja: Well, technically, there's 'Self-Proclaimed-Materia-Hunter', but it's not really a nickname, cause it's way longer than your actual name, and it's more of a description of what you are.
Yuffie: Oh. Okay.
Htaed: First question! Okay, now, men, what is your opinion on the pairings? –is struggling to keep a straight face-
Danja: -also struggling to keep a straight face-
Cloud: Pairings?
Sephiroth: Pairings?
Vincent: Pairings?
Zack: Pairings?
Kadaj: Pairings?
Grimm: Oh, boy.
Yuffie: Oh, this is gonna be good.
Htaed: Yeah, you know, SephirothxCloud, SephirothxVincent, SephirothxKadaj, SephirothxZack, SephirothxGenesis, ZackxCloud…the list goes on and on and on…
All (except Htaed, Danja, Yuffie & Grimm): WTF?!?!
Sephiroth: Why are all of these with two guys?! And why am I in every single one except ZackxCloud?!
Danja: Htaed! You forgot about the threesomes!
Htaed: Oh, yeah. My bad. Forgot to mention SephirothxZackXCloud and-
Sephiroth: -faints-
Zack: -faints-
Cloud –faints-
All: -looks down at fainted men-
Htaed: Well, then.
Grimm: I never took them for the fainting type…
Danja: Ooh! Can we draw on their faces?
Yuffie: Ooh! Can we?
Htaed: I haz Sharpie!
All three: YAY!
Vincent: You three are the definition of immature.
Danja: -not listening- OMG put a star there!
Htaed: -not listening- OMG leopard spots!
Yuffie: -not listening- OMG let's do it!
Grimm: -is asleep- Zzz.
Kadaj: ……………………….
Vincent: …I'm leaving.
Htaed: WHAT?! WHYYYYYY?!?!
Vincent: -is gone-
Danja and Htaed: NOOOOOO!!! Teh emo vampire iz GONE!!! –look at each other- AAAAAAAANGST!!!!
Yuffie: Less talk, more doodle.
Kadaj: ………………bye.
Girls: Bye emo child!!
Cameraman: …As our hosts are otherwise occupied, and all guests not participating willingly or not, have gone, we shall terminate this session.
Htaed & Danja: WAI-!
Click.