The morning of September first dawned bright and early, and Alexa Louise Burke was already awake, buttering toast and humming to herself. Absolutely nothing was going to get her spirits down today, not even her sister. Speak of the devil...
"And the devil shall appear." She finished aloud, turning to face her invariably grumpy kin.
And her face was utterly and completely red.
"But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?" Alex cried, comically shielding her eyes. Elaine Burke turned, if possible, even redder, and flipped her sister off.
"Charming. Simply charming. Tell me, sister dearest, how does one go about retaining a reputation as a heartless bitch and yet keep up such pleasant manners?"
At this, Elaine retorted "Go ahead, laugh. It'll be interesting to see mum and dad's reaction when you're sorted into HUFFLEPUFF." And flounced off.
"At least I don't feel the need to display their house colours on my face. Going for Gryffindor are we?" Alex yelled after her, earning a muffled scream from her sister and a frown from her father as he descended the stairs into their large kitchen.
Nathaniel Burke, brother to one of the founders of the infamous 'Borgin & Burkes' dark artifacts shop, was, in fact, a very pleasant man. Usually. He was tall and thin, with black hair and the most peculiar violet eyes. His entire family had been in Slytherin until the sorting hat had proclaimed him a Ravenclaw.
Her mother's side of the family carried the direct line of Rowena Ravenclaw herself, and - unsurprisingly - the whole family had been in their ancestors house.
Every single one of them.
Up until now, Alex and her sister had been home-schooled by their parents and various highly-paid tutors who never lasted long. Elaine, were she to attend Hogwarts, would be in her final year. She had decided not to. Alex though, was going to be in her fourth year.
Alexandra Burke was an attractive girl, and she knew it. Even when you saw little of the outside world, it was difficult not to notice the pairs of male eyes that followed her like cats watching a bird.
She had long golden-blonde hair that fell in wild curls almost to the small of her back. Her skin was flawless and tanned, and her eyes were the same shade of deep purple as her father's. Her frame was tall and curvaceous, with long limbs and a flat stomach. Her looks were her mother's apart from her unusual eyes. Her sister looked exactly like their mother, apart from her colouring. She had the straight black hair and creamy skin of their father.
Apart from today, she mused. She had no idea what the cause of the tomato-face scenario had been, but she wished she knew. That was the kind of joke that was literally begging for a repeat.
Nodding to her father, she made her way upstairs. I wonder what they'll do to me if I'm not in Ravenclaw? she thought absently. Maybe they will actually kill me and make it look like an accident. Or maim me significantly, at the very least. Perhaps her father wouldn't be too hard on her if she was in Slytherin. You never could tell with him. His whole family had been Slytherin, maybe she could somehow pin the blame on him.
But for some reason Slytherin didn't really appeal to her. Maybe it was fact that she associated Slytherin with the evil mass-murderer who was taking over the wizarding world. Or maybe it was because she didn't really like the colour green. Whatever.
Hufflepuff? She thought briefly, and just as quickly dismissed it. No, that's where they put the left-overs. My parents would definately kill me then, and they probably wouldn't even bother with the 'making it look like an accident' thing either. Gryffindor, then? She supposed that wouldn't be too bad, bravery and um... chivalry and all that.
She knew she could get into Ravenclaw if she wanted. No problemo. She was very clever. Very clever and very good-looking. Very clever, very good-looking, and in possession of a very large ego.
Obviously.
* * *
Alex was standing at the platform in King's Cross with a disgruntled Elaine - who's face had recently been returned to it's usual colour - and a tearful mother. Her father had stayed at home. She was wearing tight black jeans and knee-high black Doc Martins, with a long-sleeved, low-cut t-shirt in Gryffindor red - just to annoy her mother.
"Now, be good, and prove that you earned your place in Ravenclaw! I won't have anyone saying that you were only picked because you are a direct blood relative of Rowena Ravenclaw." Her mother's voice rose slightly at the end of the sentence so that it carried as far as possible, as Alex knew it would. It always did. Her mother was proud of her lineage.
"Alright dear, onto the train with you." Her mother's voice cut through Alex's internal monologue. "We'll watch for your owl informing us of your place in Ravenclaw. Come on, we don't want you to be late!" Giving her a tearful kiss, her mother levitated her trunk onto the train and pushed Elaine towards her. Apparently the reason for her earlier complexion had been the result of an experimental charm placed on the soap by Elaine herself.
"Er, bye."
"Au revoir, my love!" Alex shouted cheerfully, planting a wet kiss on her sister's cheek and dodging the kick the brunette aimed at her.
The whistle sounded then, and Alex clambered aboad. Leaning out of the window she said with a heroic smile,
"Fear not, fair ones! I will return! You need not mourn your loss for too long!" Her mother's face was an interesting mix of annoyance and sadness as she waved her lace-trimmed hanky, and Elaine simply rolled her eyes and looked in the opposite direction.
Giving a military salute, Alex leant back into the compartment and looked straight into a pair of laughing brown eyes.
"Hello," the person said, "I don't believe I know you. I'm Alice, Alice Frost. Who the hell are you?"
"Hello Alice, Alice Frost, I'm Alex Burke. I'm a newbie."
"Fantastic. Makes a nice change to see a new face 'round here. What year?"
"Fourth. Almost definately gonna be a Ravenclaw. You?"
"Fourth." Alice said, smiling broadly, "Gryffindor. What makes you so confident?"
"I'm Ravenclaw's heir. No way I'm getting out of it."
"Genius" Alice grinned. She made the word sound like an adjective and a compliment at the same time.
The next four hours taught Alex that Alice had a wicked sense of humour, a love bordering on addiction to Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans (a fact only made apparent by the lunch trolley's arrival, when the girl in question bought a total of six boxes, and still finished Alex's), and a boyfriend named Frank Longbottom, who was also a Gryffindor fourth year.
They were just discussing the complete incompetence of the new chaser for the Holyhead Harpies, when the compartment door slid open and a very pretty girl with large green eyes and dark red hair stepped in.
"Alright Lils?" Alice asked with her customary grin,
"Hi Alice" the girl replied, throwing Alex a quick look. "New student?" she asked,
"Alexa Louise Burke. Fourth year, almost definately going to be a Ravenclaw. You?"
She smiled and replied "Lily Evans. Fourth year, Gryffindor. How do you know you'll be in Ravenclaw?"
Alex rolled her eyes and muttered "Direct blood line to Rowena Ravenclaw. Mum's side of the family have all been in there."
Lily's eyes widened and then she laughed. "Wonderful. You must be a raging intellectual."
Alice snorted and said "Don't be such a bloody hypocrite, Evans. I've seen you in charms."
Lily looked guiltily away and then muttered "I'm off, just popped in to say hi."
Alice nodded, "Send my er... tolerance to Sev, won't you? I was going to say love, but it wasn't the right sentiment"
Lily frowned. "Fine." She said snappily, "Bye then." and flounced out. Alice sank lower in her chair and sighed.
"Eh? What was all that?"
Alice slowly shut her eyes and groaned. "Lily's a muggleborn. She met this boy before she came to Hogwarts, knew what she was and all that, told her too. She hated him 'till she got her letter. They got all buddy-buddy and then we got here and he got sorted into Slytherin. He hangs out with some right sadistic prats but she refuses to give up her friendship with him. He's obviously besotted with her."
"Oh. That's nice."
Alice opened her eyes, "No it bloody isn't. Lily's also got this complete wanker James Potter following her around like a lost puppy, and him and Severus are sort of... mortal enemies, I guess. Lily hates Potter, but Sev can't seem to get it into his thick head."
"Ah."
"Ah indeed"
At that point the compartment door slid open again to reveal a very good-looking boy with black hair and glasses.
"Frost! You haven't seen Evans have you? I've been... who's this?"
"Bloody hell," Alex said, turning to Alice, "Am I right in assuming...?" Alice nodded in confirmation. Alex snorted "Doesn't miss a que this one, does he?"
Alice shot her a grin and retorted "Potter. Lily just left. This is-"
"Well, hello." Another boy had just appeared at the door, he was quite startlingly good looking, with shaggy black hair and grey eyes. "Who might you be, gorgeous?"
"Black, shut up." Alice said, sighing. "Alex, this is Potter and Black, Potter and Black, this is Alex."
"Hello Alex," Black said, giving her a charming smile. "New are we? Don't worry, Sirius will look after you." And he sat down next to her and slipped his arm around her waist.
Alex smiled at him coyly and leant over to whisper in his ear, "In your dreams... gorgeous" and she leant back and winked cheekily at him.
Sirius chuckled and squeezed her lightly round the middle. "You can count on that," he quipped, before prodding James out of the room,
"Come on Jim-jams, lets off-ski. No Evans in here." And together they loped off back down the corridor.
"Well done," Alice patted her knee, "I've never seen Black so disgruntled."
"That was him... disgruntled? Jesus, I'd hate to see him cheerful."
"Welcome to my world, beautiful." Alice laughed, and turned to her Every Flavour Beans.
* * *
On the way up to the castle Alex and Alice shared a carriage with Frank Longbottom, who turned out to be very nice and very funny, his soft humour balancing Alice's quick wit out brilliantly. They were a perfect couple, Alex thought smugly. She already considered Alice her best friend, and it seemed Alice returned the sentiments. There were a few Hufflepuffs sharing the carriage with them, and a fourth year named Amos Diggory claimed her attention immediately. They spent the trip flirting harmlessly, and Diggory left with the parting line "Until next time, gorgeous." and a quick wink.
A stern-looking woman named Professor McGonagall intercepted her before she reached the doors, forcing Alice to leave her with a swift hug and a "Don't worry. If you're not in Ravenclaw... well, your family will get it. I hope."
"I know, I know, no two cornflakes look the same and all that, be an induvidual." Frank gave her a quick squeeze and a "See you later, mate"
Professor McGonagall seemed torn between amusement and disapprovement, so she merely said; "You'll be sorted after the first years. Wait here until I call you, please."
And disappeared into the Great Hall.
Oh. Ok then. Alice thought, Leave me in the Entrance Hall in a strange school I've never been to before, all on my own. No, really, I don't mind.
She flopped down onto the bottom step of the enormous grand staircase and put her chin in her hands. Her hair fell around her like a gold curtain, so that all that was visible were her purple eyes, her nose, and her fingers which were splayed across her face.
You know what? She thought suddenly, I don't even care what house I'm anymore. I'm clever, I'm pretty brave - or stupid, depending on how you want to look at it, I'm cunning as hell, and I like to think I'm, y'know, nice. Hufflepuff stuff.
Ok, maybe I still don't want to be in Hufflepuff.
It could have been minutes or hours later that McGonagall opened the doors to the hall and said smartly "Burke, in here please. We're ready for you."
Right. Yes. Showtime.
Alex slowly rose her feet, and walked lazily towards the door. She brushed past McGonagall and made her way easily up to the front of the room, swinging her hips and enjoying the mesmeric effect it had on most of the male population of the school.
At the front of the room, she sat on the stool and the hat was placed on her head. She closed her eyes and waited.
"Hmm, lovely, lovely, a Burke, eh? One of the Ravenclaws. You'd do nicely there, you know. Hmm. Difficult. You've got the makings of a true Gryffindor in there, and a bit of Slytherin. But where to put you?"
Not Ravenclaw, Alex thought suddenly, surprising both of them.
"Not Ravenclaw? Are you sure? The moment you sat down I could tell there was something different about you, Alexa Burke, but how does this tip the scales? I wonder... hmm. Well, if it's not Ravenclaw, I suppose it better be; GRYFFINDOR"
Alex heard the hat shout this last word to the entire hall and the Gryffindor table erupt into cheers through a haze of stunned joy. The few Ravenclaws who knew of her lineage sat with their mouths open as Alex came back to herself and leapt off the stool into Alice's arms. Alice was making incomprehensibly high-pitched noises and similtaneously crushing the air out of her lungs in a tight embrace. Frank looked bemused and said laughingly, "Whaddaya know? The genius is a secret Gryffindor." Before smiling happily at Alex and ruffling her hair.
"Welcome to Gryffindor, love," Sirius leaned over to high five her. "May your life be long and your children have many, many limbs. I'm not sure what that means exactly, but I'm sure it's pleasant."
"My life most certainly will not be long after this." Alex said with a stricken face, "Oh, the horror. My mother is absolutely going to murder me." She added with relish, stabbing a potato gleefully.
James patted her head. "Don't worry. Siri-poo here is still alive and well, and his mother is an absolute nut. Completely barmy. Madder than a squirrel." Siri-poo nodded, his mouth too full of chicken for him to do anything else, swallowing quickly, he added "Absolute fruit loop, but never mind. Remus, dear! Oi, get your well-formed buttocks over here!"
Alex watched as the boy with the well-formed buttocks slid slightly closer to their little group. "Hello," he said politely, his brown eyes soft and his blonde hair floppy and curly. If he had been sitting next to anyone but Sirius and James he would have been considered handsome, but he paled a little in comparison to them. "Remus Lupin. You're Alex, and I know this because Sirius wouldn't shut up abou-". Sirius' hand was clamped firmly over Remus' mouth, a grim expression on his handsome face.
"Remus has difficulty knowing when to shut up. It's a terrible affliction and we're trying to cure it, but it's not looking hopeful." He all said this with the voice of a nurse with the job of explaining to the parents that their son had cancer. Remus rolled his eyes - the only part of his face that was visible behind Sirius' large hand - and looked pointedly at James, who stared vacantly back, pretending not to understand his wish to be freed.
Alex turned her back on the boys and looked towards Alice, who was deep in conversation with Lily and another girl who Alex assumed was their dorm mate. The girl looked tall even sitting down, and she was very skinny. Her pale brown hair was a mass of frizzy ringlets, and her round eyes were dark blue and friendly. Her skin was pale and freckled.
"Alex, this is Maggie. Maggie, Alex. You guys know each other already." She said, gesturing between Lily and Alex, who nodded and smiled at each other.
"Hi." Maggie began with a sweet smile that lit up her eyes. "Maggie Clarke, I'm a Gryffindor chaser. Well, I have been for the past two years, anyway. No immediate plans to change that status." She glanced towards a blonde boy with the shiny captain's badge on his robes, and shuddered slightly. "He's our captain. I know it's unprofessional, but he's a right bastard." She giggled nervously. "But he's really sensitive, so you have to be careful unless you want to be kicked off the team. It's a good thing we don't have too many brilliant chasers in Gryffindor, really." She suddenly stopped talking and blushed slightly. "Sorry, I always talk too much when I'm nervous. Do you play?" She added suddenly, looking curious. James Potter also halted momentarily in his discussion with Sirius to listen.
Sensing she had an audience, a confident grin spread itself across Alex's features.
"Yup. Keeper. And I'm pretty bloody good."
"No kidding?" James cut in, "I'm seeker. Got in the same year as Mags." he said, nodding at Maggie.
"Never missed a snitch, our Jim-jams." Sirius cut in fondly, before turning to Alex. "I'm a beater. Me and McLaggen." He added, rolling his eyes and jerking his shoulder towards the yellow-haired captain.
"Tosser." James snorted. Maggie nodded fiercely in agreement and turned back to Alex.
"Alice and Lily don't play."
"I commentate sometimes," Lily interjected
"Yeah. And I provide moral support." Alice said
"She hexes the other team's players for us," Maggie explained,
"She's brilliant at curses. Make a good auror, wouldn't you? Wittle Alice." Lily added, grinning evily
Alice narrowed her large eyes and tossed her short brown hair - or tried to anyway. It was too short to toss, really. (A/N Get your head out of the gutter...) "I may be little, but I could kick your arse in a duel. Try me" She added mock-threateningly. Maggie and Lily sighed and Alex shook her head good-naturedly. Alice looked around at them all and sighed as well.
"Yeah, ok. Don't rub it in. Just because you're a genius and Maggie's got the fastest reactions ever..." she said, nodding towards Lily and Maggie respectively. "If you lot were normal I'd kick your arses."
"Oi, don't forget me!" Alex cried, "I've had to practice duelling with a N.E.W.T. level student for my whole life. Who just happens to be my sister." She grinned smugly. "There's no way you'd beat me, either."
Alice sank down in her seat. "Well. Now I feel really shit."