I sat in the living room, thinking about my decision. Was it the right one? I could still change my mind. I could still stay here. I didn't have to go.

But, in some ways, I felt that I did. I had to go. Or else, I knew I'd always wonder, and I'd always think about him. I wanted him to know that I was alive, and that was I happy. Thinking about it, I also wanted to see him just because I missed him. He looked after me, and he tried to help me escape. I wanted to know what he was doing now.

If he was even still alive. I hoped so.

The house seemed so empty, but it wasn't any different than usual. Zephyr and Vashyron were both still there, and it was still home. Home. It took so long for me to be able to call it that. It wasn't that I didn't want to, but it felt weird. It didn't feel…right when I first got here. But a year later, it felt like it had always been home to me, and thinking about being anywhere else felt funny. It wasn't just the house itself either; it was the people in it.

It was going to be hard to leave them, and know that I might not ever see them again. I felt a little guilty just walking out after all they'd done for me. But I couldn't let them know where I was going. They would never let me leave the house, and they wouldn't understand how much I needed to do this.

But even still, I was going to miss them. I hoped that it wouldn't hurt them too much when I left. It could go back to the way it was before, before I got there. It seemed like I flipped their world upside down, and anymore, I couldn't figure out if that had been a good or bad thing for them. They would be fine—I had to tell myself that—and they could live life the way they did when it was just the two of them. There wasn't going to be any third person to mess up the equation.

Vashyron could have his room back, and he wouldn't have to sleep on the couch anymore. Zephyr could stop worrying about me. Things would be normal for them again. It would be just fine.

I was on the couch, looking around at the walls, thinking about what fun I did have here and everything I'd been through with them.

There was the night that the entire city blacked out. I was in the shower then, and when the lights went out, I couldn't see a thing. My foot ended up getting twisted in the shower curtain, and when I fell, I screamed. Zephyr thought I was being attacked by something, and charged in to rescue me.

I felt a little bad for slapping him, but he did scare me, and no guy is supposed to barge in on a girl like that. But it was still a little sweet. I mean, he was just trying to help me.

And no matter what he says, I still think he got a little peek. I can see it in the way he smirks whenever Vashyron brings it up and he swears he "didn't see anything." It makes me want to slap him all over again.

There was the day that they decided to play "dress up" with me, and Vashyron painted a flower over my entire face. It was for a mission to try to get on the Cardinals' good side so that we could bring in the "big bucks." It was what Vashyron had always wanted. I guess they had to wait for me to come around to try to bait Cardinal Garigliano, since I'm sure Zephyr would've killed Vashyron if he did that to him.

I was the stupid one that didn't ask any questions. I learned pretty quickly that Vashyron couldn't be trusted when he said "just trust me."

There was the time that I came down with a really bad cold, and Zephyr didn't leave my side that entire morning. He dragged Vashyron out of the house so that they could find medicine for me. I guess they even took on some sort of Colossus that day because it was standing in the way of the Chemist's Closet, where the medicine was.

It was the memories like that that made me feel like I'd lived here my entire life, and saying good-bye was going to be hard. I wasn't even going to say good-bye—I already swore I couldn't. I'd change my mind if I said directly to them that I was leaving.

I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. I jumped and turned to look at who it was. It didn't hit me until now that I should've left sooner. I spent too long trying to prepare and bring myself to do it and I missed my chance.

"What are you doing?" Zephyr asked, coming down the second set of stairs. "You're up early."

"Oh, yeah. I couldn't sleep," I said. "You're up kind of early too."

He usually slept in later than I did, since most mornings, I had to go upstairs and beat on his door. Of all mornings, he chose today to get up on his own.

"Couldn't sleep either," he said.

He leaned over and looked at the TV in front of me, scowling when he saw the black screen.

"The TV isn't even on. You're just sitting here?" he said.

"Yeah, something like that."

"Are you okay? You sound a little…I don't know, sad," he said. "Are you getting another cold?"

I smiled and shook my head. "I'm okay."

He didn't look convinced.

"I promise," I said.

Zephyr eyed me as he turned away and walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

I braced myself. If I was going to leave, it had to be now. I wasn't going to get another chance and I didn't want to wait until tomorrow. I knew that I'd probably talk myself out of it if I waited another day.

I stood up and, even though I wanted to, refused to let myself look back as I walked out the door. Going to Aetersyl was probably a stupid thing to do, and I knew how tough the security was going to be. I didn't even know if I'd make it to the first gate before I was shot down, but I had to try. I had to.

I was going to find a way to get to Professor Juris, and I wasn't going to give up.

After I stepped outside, as I started to close the front door, I could hear the toilet flush and I knew it wouldn't be long before they realized I was gone. The house wasn't very big and it was like both of them had a sixth sense that detected when anything was wrong with me.

I had to go right then. I knew they'd come looking for me, and they'd try to stop me. I had to get ahead of them and get there before they could catch up.

Good-bye, and I'm sorry.