A/N: Another blog from my time as Charlie Swan. A bit darker for our Chuck. R&R appriciated
Drip. Drip. Drip.
That's all I could hear in the silent house, maddening as it was, I could not escape the silence of this house once so filled with noise and life, I was trapped where I was while the rain poured and my life flashed past my eyes, spinning out of control with no way to stop it. No cries from a child would wake me tonight. No, sure as there would be day in but a few hours, I would hear no sounds tonight but the bitter howl of wind and the patter of rain on our roof… My roof.
I wiped my eyes with my hanky once again, my heart shattered into millions of pieces, while my head denied the passing of such an event. I was trapped in myself, torn between two paths with only one truth to be told. They were gone.
My baby was gone. My wife was gone. My entire reason to go on ceased to exist in that one little sentence, the sentence that broke my heart.
"Just let me go, Charlie. It didn't work out okay? I really, really hate Forks."
The words replayed bitterly in my head, over and over as though God wished to torment me even more so with his spite. I was not a bad man. I do not deny doing anything wrong in my life, in my relationship with Renee, but for the life of me, I could not bring myself to think that this heartbreak would be just for any man.
I couldn't breathe. Everything I knew in my life tumbled down in the space of one afternoon. It was not as though it were spur-of-the-moment, on the contraire, it had been coming for months; any fool could see that, but to imagine the truth? That was unheard of, even for me. I just thought things would be sorted out, who could hate Forks?
Who could hate Forks so much to leave me…
I bit back more tears as my heart wrenched once again, the hole within too big to be covered, I could still smell her on my sheets, I could practically hear her voice whispering how much she loved me. I could feel her in my arms. I couldn't bear it.
Quickly rising from my bed, I walked towards the door, I needed to get out. I couldn't be within a room so filled with the memories of the woman I loved and lost. Halfway across the hall my heart stopped. There, the door wide open, my daughter's room… calling to me like a siren, her name etched upon the door. Isabella.
I felt my chest tighten and I knew I had to go in there. I moved towards the room and felt more sobs come to my chest; I climbed onto her tiny bed and curled up, the tears flowing. I was a broken man, no... I was not a man I was an empty husk. I was nothing but the shell left over for the spoils while my heart moved with two twin holes deep within, aching and growing each moment without them. My sorrow taking hold of me caused me to envision many ways to stop the pain, the hurt before throwing them aside so that I may sob. I breathed in the scent of my little girl, weeping all the while. Without Renee I was a husk… Without Bella, I was nothing.
Nothing but a broken down man; lying in the crib of his daughter; with two gaping holes within stuck his chest.