Author's usual notes and disclaimer: I don't own any of the original characters nor the original Inspector Lynley Mysteries – they belong to Elizabeth George and the BBC. I have borrowed the characters from the TV-show and solely own the ideas of my stories and the developments I've let them go through.

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Author's note and summary: Chaos and drama but romance too - sometimes the truth reveals itself completely unexpected. A short story. Enjoy...

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The Truth

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They had come home to his house early this evening and had eaten a quick simple dinner during which he had made sure that she was drinking enough liquids. Afterwards they went into his living room with a cup of tea. Both still in the borrowed police sweat pants and T-shirts Tommy busied himself with lighting some logs in the fire place while Barbara made herself comfortable on his cosy sofa. She almost tried to vanish in one corner of it and she had her hands folded in her lap. It was going to be a long embarrassing evening, she feared. This caring man was making her completely nervous and for her liking she had been acting weird enough for tonight. She almost dared not say anything at all in case something awkward would slip her tongue.

"What now? Just wait until it stops?" Tommy asked dropping down in the other corner of his sofa and pushed another glass of water over to her. She really had to drink a lot tonight against the drug effects and against the predicted headaches so that cup of strong sweet tea would not be enough. "Or we could play a match of Scrabble. Anything you'd like, Barbara." He gave her an affectionate smile.

Barbara moved her eyes up from her cup to his face and grinned. Anything? If he would ever know what she would like... Her eyes went down to his smiling lips. He did not even know how he was tempting her, almost challenging her to give in to what she really would like to do. Suddenly a previously unknown boldness claimed her and in a smooth move she just crawled over to the other corner of his sofa where he leisurely sat with his right arm on the backrest, placed one knee beside his hip, straddled him somehow, pinned him somehow against the cushions, snaked her arms around his neck, buried her fingers in the hair at the back of his head and claimed those tempting lips of his with hers in a seething kiss. In an instant and with just a fragment of no thoughts his hands were in her back and at her sides, grabbing the cloth of her T-shirt, squeezing her bottom and stroking her thigh, his lips answering her kiss with the same unrestricted lust she poured out on him with her entire body. There was no need for her to let her teeth gently ask for permission nibbling at the soft flesh of his bottom lip, she did it anyway though his mouth already automatically had opened for her tongue to invade. Small moans of pleasure quickly filled the room as the gates of her desire opened up to him.

Then reality struck into Tommy's brain like a flash into a dry tree. Barbara still was under the influence of this drug. Yes, sure, he knew she obviously had fancied him for a while but under normal circumstances she never would have let herself go this far. She was seldom blessing him with tender smiles. So if they would not stop now and continue walking down this dangerous path he truly wanted to go with Barbara it may be just becoming embarrassing for her. As much as he cared for her and wanted her and wanted this, had wanted this for so long even if he had not been sure until this week, he should not let it go too far, or not any further that is. He really should not act on his own deep feelings for this woman, at least not at the moment. She was vulnerable and she was under his protection. He had to end this now, as difficult as it was for him, but right at the moment he was her protector not her lover.

Not yet.

When Barbara felt his sudden hesitation the wave of unrestrained wantonness ebbed as quickly as it had washed over her. Short flashback effects would come and go for a while, the doctor had said. Now she knew what he had meant. She pushed herself up to get away from her boss but he grabbed her hand and kept her close. This wonderful, desirous kiss had happened and they would work it out, talk it through, try to make it less hard to go on, whatever direction it may take.

Barbara was deep red and embarrassed to the bone about her appetent attack. Tommy's lovingly caring smile was of no great help.

"I'm sorry." She almost choked at her words. "It's just... Sorry, I forgot mys-"

"Ssshh!" Tommy pulled her back close to his chest and allowed her to hide her face in his jumper. "I know, it's the remnants of that drug, Barbara. Don't be ashamed. The doctor told me you would feel the effects for a little while and even when you think the drug's gone there'll be brief moments in which it still kicks in."

His hands drew soothing circles on her back and tender lines up and down her spine while he hugged her and Barbara could not help but quietly start to cry. How could she ever explain this? Of course the drug running through her veins was not totally disintegrated yet and she still partly could put the blame on the chemical but actually there was no real need to assault him like that. It really was just a little bit of the drug-induced licentiousness. Most of it was... the truth. Her mind twirled. Of course it was the truth because it had been a truth drug they had given her! Barbara knew she loved her boss and now she also knew that it was one of the worst ideas to stay at his house in this state to have him keep an eye on her tonight. She really should have stayed under the observation of the nurses at hospital. She was an idiot to come here.

And then Barbara felt him kissing her hair while his warm hands still softly lay on her back. He was not only prolonging their embrace, it looked as if he was turning it into something completely different. Completely gentle. Completely... completing. It was not only sexual attraction or desire, he was hugging her completely tenderly making her feel completely at home. His arms around her felt like he would never want to let her go and she almost could not believe it though she was sure her hallucinations had ended this morning when they had rescued her in the moment before the kidnappers had been about to give her another dose of the drug. Down there in the cold humid cellar she had been too drowsy and too devitalised to fully realise what had been going on around her. The only thing she could remember were the same warm and tender hands on her back she was feeling now, the same familiar smell of Tommy's aftershave she was smelling now, mixed with a still unfamiliar personal smell of his skin when he had held her close like he was holding her close now. She sobbed.

"Barbara?" Tommy whispered. "Barbara, my sweet Barbara..." Softly rocking her he placed another kiss onto the skin in the back of her neck. "You... we shouldn't be ashamed of what just had happened. You know... this..." he stifled a chuckle. "...sultry outbreak, well... it is a truth drug they had injected into your blood stream and..."

Tommy needed a few deep breaths when reality hit him hard with this... truth. Barbara was not only fancying him. She had no simple - or complicated - crush on him. Barbara obviously loved him. Or so he hoped. So very unlike too many women he had come to know Barbara would not just act on sexual desire because there was the opportunity for it coming along by chance and never would she do something like that without having any true feelings hidden under the surface. Not even under the influence of a loosening truth drug. The fact that she had done it right now made the detective come to only one possible solution: deep down inside under layers of prejudices, presumptions, insecurities and objections, Barbara probably loved him. Like he loved her. He had to tell her of his feelings. Every moment going by without having it said aloud would be a wasted moment and life was too short to waste another second.

"Barbara, I... I love you." he whispered and it made her sob again. With both arms he pulled her even closer into his chest and with relief he felt her arms hesitantly sneaking their way around his waist. "And I'm glad that this kiss had happened, my sweet. I probably would have been a coward until the end of time if you wouldn't have crawled over to my side. Your boldness may have been drug-induced but it only showed the truth. You never should be ashamed of that."

He heard her affirmative hum, a muffled voice murmuring something like "Mmmh... luv ya too!" vibrating through his chest, making his heart burst with joy, and he felt the heat of her breath creeping through the thin cloth of his jumper. Tommy squeezed her reassuringly but Barbara still was not able to face his eyes so he kept on talking softly into her ear.

"What had happened to you in the past days could've been... Oh, I don't even dare to think what else could've happened to you. I was so afraid you'd never return to me. I mean..." Tommy swallowed down the lump in his throat before he went on with his tender voice. It had the palpable effect on Barbara that she was clearly calming down now. Her sobs ebbed. "That sounds selfish, eh? You're in the hands of those kidnappers and all I can think of was that you may never return into my life. Believe me, I was horrified something even worse than what really had happened was going on. Not that I would want to play it down, by no means, my sweet, but I'm so glad they just tried to get the information out of you in a chemical way." He stopped and placed a kiss on her temple. Her face still was hidden in his jumper. "Oh my! I'm talking too much..."

Only disturbed by small soothing crackles of the burning wood comfortable silence filled the room for a while in which they just laid there on the sofa. The sun had completely set now but Tommy was not caring at all to get up and turn on the lights in the room. He still simply hugged her and it had made Barbara stop sobbing completely. "Is it better now?" Quietly he eventually asked into the darkness but received no answer. The deep regular breathings emerging from the now relaxed woman on his chest then told him that Barbara finally had fallen asleep there. Deeply contented Tommy sighed. They would spend their first night together sleeping fully dressed on his sofa after almost a full week of horror, pain and angst and an unexpected confusing but relieving and very honest way of showing their love for each other. This was so like Barbara, Tommy thought, there probably was no chance of commonly practised romance with her. Chaos and drama. He sensed that a life with her would be all but boring. A lifetime with Barbara - that was what he wanted. Now he knew for sure. It made him smile.

With one hand he fished for the blanket from the backrest and covered them both. Then he wriggled a bit to make himself comfortable with another cushion in his neck and closed his eyes. They probably would be stiff when they wake up but for now he would let sleep take over the healing process. All healing processes.

While he was drifting into sleep with Barbara still lying on top of him Tommy told himself that though life was too short to waste any second tomorrow would be enough time to look out for more truths together. More real and unenforced truths.

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A/N: Actually my mind had started working when I was watching DCI Banks where Annie climbs on Alan's lap and they kissed. I was asking myself what on earth would bring Barbara to climbing on Tommy's lap and kiss him like this...

Thanks for reading.