[Girls und Panzer is the property of Actas, while Despicable Me is the property of the Illumination Entertainment and the Universal Pictures. Original Characters are mine.]

Despicable Girls

Prologue

December 30, 2016

11:45 PM Friday, Pacific Standard Time

Gru's House somewhere in Los Angeles, California

"GRU!"

"Arrghh! Wuz up, Ductur Nuforiu?"

"It's Dr. Nefario, Gru! Come down here! I have a breakthrough!"

"This late?"

"Yes!"

"I am sleeping! Leave the girls alooonnee!"

"Gru! The girls are sleeping! Leave them be! I am only calling for you!"

"Arrghh! Olrught!"

12 minutes later . . .

"Gru, this is it!"

An elderly man in white labcoat stood firm and proud, overlooking his creation. His friend, however, was not so proud.

"You wok mi en de mido uf de naught," his friend moaned. He spoke with a rather deep, Russian-like accent, which was even more pronounced when he was tired. "I wuz slinpin orly, too! Whuz de fuz?"

"But look at this!" Dr. Nefario said, pointing with his right black gloved hand at his newest invention. "It's my greatest invention ever, Gru! It sure could sell millions at the AVL!"

"Whut ez it?" he moaned. He was still in his pajamas, although he put his classic striped gray scarf around his neck. His dull, blue eyes stared aimlessly, trying to focus.

"Hold your nose up, will ya?" Dr. Nefario cried out enthusiastically, squeezing his friend's long, slightly down-curved nose hard. Gru winced, waking up a little.

"Ouch!" he cried. "You got that from my girls, did you?"

"And it's excellent as wake-up," Dr. Nefario said proudly. "I am actually glad to have the girls here for once!"

"So, go on with your rant," said Gru.

"Here is my latest invention," Dr. Nefario continued. "My would-be world-famous teleportation device!"

"Tele-fart device?" Gru grunted. He knew that Dr. Nefario had a hard time with words, due to his hearing problem.

"No, no!" Dr. Nefario said. "This time, I have heard you loud and clear!"

He motioned his hands towards the device. Gru looked.

In front of him was what looked like a normal, white dish antenna, except that it had a handle attached to it, so that it looked like a special ray-gun.

"This is a teleportation device?" asked Gru, doubting. "It surely looks so . . . mundane."

"That's the whole point!' Dr. Nefario. "This device is meant to be aimed at something. You aim it like a gun, and it opens a portal! That portal allows you to transport from one place to another! Even better, I don't need to make two portals; it makes that all by itself!"

"And how do you know that?" asked Gru, now much more awake. He found it more interesting, and he remembered telling his friend to make one, because Dr. Nefario wanted to work with the AVL. The AVL director, Silas Ramsbottom, told him that he will hire him, if he could make an impressive device.

"This is one great invention!" Dr. Nefario cried out. "Worthy of the brain of a mad scientist like I who could now prove to even the AVL that I am worthy of science and society alike!"

Gru smiled. His friend had been down lately, still wanting to make something worthwhile. Now, Gru was proud to realize that Dr. Nefario finally acted like a triumphant villain for once.

"Well . . ." Dr. Nefario remembered. "I had to test it first. On the first try, it did nothing except make a glowing rift or something. Then, I fixed it, and it opened a portal! Apparently, this device instantly makes a wormhole or portal to the other location. Hence, I do not need to aim this twice. As usual, I told the Minions to go through the portal first."

"And?"

"And they did not come back," said Dr. Nefario. "I accidentally transported them to some paradise islands in the Caribbean."

"They could not come back?" asked Gru, incredulous. "If so, then you cannot show this to the AVL!"

"No, no," Dr. Nefario said. "They could, but chose not to. I told them to come back in, but they got too interested in the banana plants there."

Gru sighed.

"And do you know where they are?" he asked.

"Of course!" Dr. Nefario said. He pointed to the antenna's handle. On top of it was a monitor screen.

"This screen," he explained. "Shows the location of the portal. When you point it, it creates a portal. Then, the screen shows the area of the portal. "That's how I could tell that the Minions ended up somewhere in the Caribbean."

"And can you re-open them?" asked Gru.

"Of course!" he answered. "It's a safety system! The AVL would kill me if I do not install some sort of a security system in case of accidents like this-"

"Do that," Gru cut him off. He was not really listening, his face in a frown at the laziness of his Minions.

"What?"

"Open the portal to the islands."

"Now?" he asked.

"Yes," Gru grunted. "I have some words with them . . ."

December 31, 2016

12:10 AM Saturday, Pacific Standard Time

"And get my permission next time, you guys."

Gru had a short but serious talk with the Minions who got "stranded" in the Caribbean. All eight of them were standing there, fidgeting.

"Next time," he said. "If you guys do well, then I will let you go there."

"Really?" they all asked. "Cierto?"

"Cierto? True? Yes, I keep my words," said Gru. "Now go, and get some sleep. Tomorrow, we're celebrating the New Year's Eve."

"Yay!" they all cheered, and ran (with their short legs) to their beds. Gru sighed.

"So," he said. "What's next?"

Dr. Nefario kept jumping up for joy.

"I can't wait to show this to them!" he cried out. "Imagine all the glory and fame this could bring! I could now go to a fancy, foreign resort and do my own things! Maybe I can even fall in love with an Asian girl and-"

"Hold your horses!" Gru said, touching his friend by the shoulder. He quickly calmed down.

"S-Sorry," he apologized. "I just got excited and all. I am still young, you know?"

"Well," said Gru, rolling his eyes, looking at his friend. Dr. Nefario had messy white hair, and looked mildly obese. "You can save your 'time' with Asian girls and such later. Right now, it's not about girls; it's about this device."

"OK!" Dr. Nefario uttered, checking his device. He even seemed to caress it, as if it was the greatest thing in the world.

"Speaking of girls . . ." said Gru. "Once we make that device work, we can travel anywhere around the world with this, huh?"

He started to daydream about what his whole family could do. Go to the greatest places of the world. Maybe even a long day at Tokyo, Japan for a sushi feast or something rich and fancy.

"By the way," Gru began. "Anything els-wait, Dr. Nefario?"

Dr. Nefario was handling the device with worried eyes.

"That's odd," he said. "This device is not listening."

"Come again?" Gru asked.

"It's not opening a portal," Dr. Nefario said. "It did this before, but I made it work. This time, it's doing something funny."

"What do you mean?" Gru asked.

"This device can talk," he explained, not listening. "I made it that way, adding my own AI into a GPS system, turning this into a smart teleportation device."

"And?" asked Gru. "That's impressive, but what's the problem? You know perfectly well that the AVL would not dare touch an experimental object."

"I know!" Dr. Nefario wailed. If there is one thing that he hated, it was failure.

"But hear this," he said. Both listened closely.

"Portal opening. Portal opening. Portal open upstairs. Portal open to port," it said mechanically. "Port opening at 12:15AM."

"It's not saying anything," Dr. Nefario moaned. "It normally tells me it's opening a portal here then, before opening, it tells me the location. However, it's not."

"It is," Gru said. "It's saying something about opening a portal upstairs, and then opening it to some kind of a port. Oh, by the way, it was speaking in Japanese at that time."

"But that's crazy!" Dr. Nefario exclaimed. "It only works when I aim this device! Plus, I never installed anything about 'Japanese' in it! It should only speak in English!"

"Or is it?" Gru asked. "What did-oh no! Dr. Nefario! GET OUTTA WAY!"

The device suddenly shook violently, and electric sparks started to fly out of it. Gru forced his friend to toss it, and they heard one thing that everybody in the room dreaded:

BOOM!

Ah, the realization of a dream! Originally, this was supposed to be my very first fanfic! However, my previous works ended up having a different tone than what I expected. And this first chapter was supposed to be an actual chapter. However, realizing that the tone was also different, I managed to re-work it so it sounds more like a foreshadowing of the things to come. So, the prologue was born. This prologue establishes how the girls from two nations will encounter each other. Yes, a teleportation device works fantastically with this.

Initially, I intend to introduce the girls in this chapter. However, being a prologue, I decide to only foreshadow them in the hints. Dr. Nefario's ranting about an "Asian girl" is a part of that, plus Gru's imagination about going to Tokyo. So, my apology to any Girls und Panzer fans for the disappointment; Girls und Panzer will appear later on. I assure you of that. In the meantime, please review, and tell others about this. I really appreciate every review, for it encourages me to keep trying. I thank Inceptor57 for the encouragement of going through this. Have fun, and Happy New Year!

Side Note: In this chapter, I used italics near the end to signify that the phrases were in Japanese. I do not speak or write Japanese, so that was the reason why I italicized them. I made up Gru's linguistic ability.