"It's sad when your life can be summed up in a Disney song," she muttered to herself. For some reason all she'd able to listen to for the past hour was the same song over and over. "Look at me, I will never pass for a perfect bride, or a perfect daughter.." she sang along with the sad little song, "Can it be, I'm not meant to play this part? Now I see that if I were truly to be myself, I would break my family's heart." Eva sighed finally turning on her back. She really wasn't one to wallow in her own pity, it got tiring after a while. Clicking the stop button on her CD player she got up to go find some ramen.
She filled the cup with water and started heating it in the microwave. 'A cup of tea sounds good too' she thought. She opened the cupboard and pulled down a teabag in a desperate need for caffeine. She flipped up the little tag and read the quote aloud, "Life needs to get moving." Laughing bitterly she tore it off and threw it in the trash. 'How can life get moving when you don't know who you are or why you're here?' her mind whispered. No she didn't hear voices, well, not the bad kind anyway. These voices gave her advice, which always helped out the situation.
She had debated on telling people about these voices but turned down the idea. Besides, she could fully function. Even if she was crazy it hadn't done anything bad to her yet. 'Except for the philosophical questions' she thought angrily. They made her think too much, way too much. 'If they're always going to put you down, why even try to impress? They'll just want more even after you've given them all you have. What's the point?' She groaned putting a palm to her forehead. "Just give me a night's rest.. Please.." It had really come to begging herself, maybe the voices weren't too good. 'Whatever you need dear, but you know I'm right' the whisper said. 'But you're me' she thought.
"Too difficult," she decided. Maybe it would be better if she was in an asylum, she wouldn't have to cook, clean, do anything really. But then again she knew deep down she'd go even crazier. Not being able to take care of herself, or eat with a fork for that matter.. 'No going to the loony bin for you, you're too smart, they'll check your grades and ship you off to some school that gives you therapy but squeezes every last thing they can into your brain. And then you'll be another robot for the country' it said a little louder this time. The microwave dinged cutting through her thoughts. "Thank God for ramen," she said lifting the cup into the air as a sort of gesture.
The tea needed a bit longer in the kettle but it wouldn't be too much longer. She sighed and sat on the stool to eat and wait. 'But then again, why not go? Or at least ask your mother for a nice music and arts crazy house.. Sure you grades are great, but the piano and sketch pencil make you happier' She smiled knowing she couldn't argue with herself there. 'Do you mind me knowing your name?' she asked the little voice. 'Well.. In a sense I am you, but then I am not. Call me what you like..' it muttered trailing off. 'But you already thought of something didn't you?' she asked smiling to herself. 'Maybe..' 'Tell me then' she thought to the voice.
'Call me Nak' it said. It sounded like it was smiling. 'Do you.. Er.. Have a gender?' she asked the little voice. 'My kind can only stay in a body with the right gender, so I'm female' 'But WHAT are you?' Eva asked anxiously. 'That's enough questions for tonight dear, by the way.. The kettle's going off-' She shook her head roughly and heard the whistling sound of the boiling kettle. She quickly pulled it off the burner and opened the top and set the tea bag inside. "Wow.. I'm pretty weird," she said. Then she started chuckling which turned into full blown laughter. Yeah, she was pretty weird. But pretty damn proud