98. Butterfly Kisses: Repo!

Daddy's little girl

'Shilo...you'll never know...you really are the world to me.'

He'd just closed his eyes.

His last strength had gone, but he had at least old her.

Told his Shilo he loved her.

Her beautiful face, so much like her mothers, smeared with tears and blood and yet she'd given him a smile.

That was all he needed as he let his eyes close.

He was even sure he had heard Marni's voice calling for him to sleep.

No anger.

No pain.

No hatred.

He felt free.

He was glad he'd set her free to.

She'd never experienced a normal life with him.

He'd kept her out of school and she obviously had no friends, but he tried his hardest to make up for that. Even when telling her she was sick, he would always although moments of craziness.

He remembered the time it was her 8th birthday and to cheer her up, he left his only contact with Rotti downstairs and bought her ingredients for a cake.

He inwardly smiled as he remembered adding the ingredients and teaching her what went in first and leaving for a few minutes, only to come back to her mouth covered in chocolate as she gave him an innocent wide-eyed look.

When she'd shown a fascination in bugs, he thought it was wonderful. She hadn't developed the urge to sneak out of the house to capture them yet, so he didn't worry on it, instead finding it wonderful when little bug's crept into the house when he left a window open downstairs. They'd spend over an hour running about the place, exhausting themselves out in trying to catch it. Whenever her medicine alarm went off, he's give it to her straight away, but as soon as she felt better, she'd go back to running and chasing that flying insect with her jar in her hands.

When she was about 5, he remembered he had to shave her hair off, and deciding to keep that hair from then to make her a wig.

He'd always cherished her hair and had spent hours sowing each strand in carefully, making sure it was all secured.

He wanted his baby looking her prettiest.

He had seen so much, yet he would miss alot to.

She had already become a young woman, but he'd never see her turn into an adult and out of her teenage years.

He'd never meet her first love.

Never walk her down the aisle.

Never hold his grandchild.

Nathan Wallace felt his body float amongst the dark and felt like crying.

But like Shilo, he had used up all his tears.

He deserved what was happening.

'Oh Shilo...I'm sorry my baby.'

He let his body go limp as he excepted his fate. A fate in hell.

"Nate....Nathan." A familiar voice echoed around him and he felt that familiar desperation in him.

"Nathan honey."

She really was calling him.

He let his eyelids flicker open slowly, not realising he had closed them, and out of the darkness came a faint blur of white.

"That's right Nathan. I'm here." He knew who it was. He thrashed his body and found himself moving towards the blur.

"Marni." He gasped, feeling like he was running through heavy water.

"Marni!" He called and found himself floating upwards. He floated towards the figure and saw the figure just the way he remembered. Her beautiful wedding dress. Her long hair hanging down across her shoulders. That smile she always had for him.

"Nathan." Much more closer and real, she called to him.

He felt tears leave his eyes, not believing how his spirit could still feel everything, even without his body. Afterall, tears where emotions, created by the soul.

His fingers slid into hers and ever so gently, he felt himself being pulled upwards with her.

He smiled at her for a long time, before closing his eyes one last time, picturing his daughters smiling face.

'Shilo...you'll never know...you really are the world to me.' His last thoughts came to him and he held tighter onto his dear Marni's fingers as he envisioned his daughter telling him he was her world.

'I love you, my baby girl.'

There's two things I know for sure:
She was sent here from heaven and she's
daddy's little girl.
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night
She talks to Jesus and I close my eyes and
I thank god for all the joy in my life
Oh, but most of all
For butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer;
sticking little white flowers all up in her
hair; "Walk beside the pony, Daddy, it's my first ride."
"I know the cake looks funny, Daddy, but I sure tried."
In all that I've done wrong I know I must
have done something right to deserve a hug
every morning and butterfly kisses at night.

Sweet 16 today
She's looking like her mama a little more everyday
One part woman, the other part girl.
To perfume and make-up from ribbons and curls
Trying her wings out in a great big world.

But I remember
Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer; sticking
little white flowers all up in her hair.
"You know how much I love you, Daddy, But if you
don't mind I'm only gonna kiss you on the cheek this time."
With all that I've done wrong I must have done
something right to deserve her love every morning
and butterfly kisses at night.

All the precious time
Like the wind, the years go by.
Precious butterfly.
Spread your wings and fly.

She'll change her name today.
She'll make a promise and I'll give her away.
Standing in the bride-room just staring at her.
She asked me what I'm thinking and I said "I'm not
sure-I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl."
She leaned over...gave me butterfly kisses with her mama there,
Sticking little white flowers all up in her hair
"Walk my down the aisle, Daddy-it's just about time."
"Does my wedding gown look pretty, Daddy? Daddy, don't cry!"

Oh, with all that I've done wrong I must have
done something right.
To deserve your love every morning and butterfly
kisses-I couldn't ask God for more, man this is what love is.

I know I gotta let her go, but I'll always remember
every hug in the morning and butterfly kisses.