Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Harry Potter characters… The quote is by John Kerry, American politician.
He had been certain that it had been the right thing to do.
That hiding his emotions would help every one.
That refusing himself the happiness of being with her would help him save his relationship with her family, who were his friends.
That refusing to honor love when it had knocked at his door would make it go away.
Like hell, it had yelled back at him, and now,…
Now, when he had to look at her every morning, every evening, and at odd times in between when he was the most unprepared, it smacked him with all the force of a blazing thunderstorm, freezing his mind, and flaming his heart.
It had been the same that day too, except, it hadn't been. And that was the day Scorpius Malfoy had realized,
"It's one thing to be certain, but you can be certain and you can be wrong."
Here is the day when Scorpius Malfoy got it right.
The day she won the game.
The day his heart came out of its self imposed imprisonment.
Wednesdays were the days Scorpius Malfoy had allocated for meeting friends.
This might seem pathetic to you. Allotting time for meeting one's friends?
It wasn't because he was too busy, no way!
It was a plan, cleverly crafted by him, to avoid running in to her.
After all, he saw enough of her to make him almost lose control at the office.
And so, imagine his surprise when he found, not Al as he had anticipated, but Rose Weasley, at the Leaky Cauldron.
"Hello, Rose!" he said as he sat opposite her.
He'd have said called her Weasley, but, it would have been too rude, given that both of them were colleagues.
"Hi Scor! Al should be here any time now" she said, and looked at the door behind him, as if expecting him to enter at the mention of his name. She seemed as discomfited as him.
"How come you are here?"
If that had sounded rude to her, she didn't let it show.
"I just had a bit of shopping to do and Al invited me to join you guys. You don't mind?"
"Not at all"
His mind had, once again, as was the case when it had any thing to do with her, developed a path of its own.
Why else would it have noticed that minute twinkle in her eye?
What other reason was there for it to detect that she was wearing loops in her ears?
Not otherwise would he have discerned the slight tapping of her shoes on the floor which indicated that she was anxious.
And that same sense of discovery was what made him see that she was tensing beneath his unwavering stare.
Moving his eyes away from her, he said, "I haven't been able to see you out of the Auror office at all!"
"That's true"
He realized, but it was too late to stop the memories.
Memories of the last time he had seen her out of the four walls of their office.
Memories of their second year anniversary.
The day her had understood what it meant to be irrevocably in love.
The day he had decided to run away in fear of the world's opinion.
The one day in his life he wished to redo more than any other.
Her face was masked with unease, a sure sign that her direction of thoughts weren't too far off either.
"I shouldn't have said that"
"No, you shouldn't have"
It had been years since he had heard that tone of her voice.
She was the only person he knew who could sound scolding and sorrowful at the same time.
The silence continued, and hoping to avoid it, both of them, at the same time, said, "Shall we order?"
"That's settled, then" Scorpius said, and before she could protest, stood up.
It was crowded in the place, and while waiting, he took the opportunity to observe her from far.
He watched closely, as another guy from their school days, whom he vaguely remembered was in Hufflepuff, greeted her and sat where he had been seated not five minutes ago.
He turned back to the line, trying to ignore the infamous green eyed monster, which was roaring inside him on seeing her smile at that guy.
It didn't matter to him that she was laughing with some one else.
He only seemed to make her embarrassed now-a-days, any way.
He had taken a decision and he would stay by it.
He shook his head once, to clear off the tinkling sound of her laughter that echoed ten times lovelier in his mind.
"You don't want it?"
"Oh no, I do. I'll take it" he said and left hurriedly with the food, ignoring the confused stares of the waitress.
"Here" he said shortly as he placed her food and drink before her.
"Thanks, Scor. Do you remember Kim? He was with us in our Herbology classes"
"Oh, yeah! I do" he was silent as he took the only seat left, the one beside her.
It was torture enough to him to be this near to her; it was quite a different degree of it with another person in front and claiming her full attention.
Al did appear at last, apologizing profusely for being late, as was the usual with him.
Scorpius, it seemed wasn't the only one who had developed a dislike to Kim.
His greetings, like Scorpius' had been, were cutting and non conversational, which was so unlike him that Rose turned to him in bewilderment.
"Some thing the matter with you, Al? You seem a bit out of it today?"
"Nothing. Nothing. I just need a bit of time to settle, I guess" he said and, contradicting him self, stood to get the drinks.
Scorpius was left alone with the conversing two, and, without Al, he had no one to talk to.
He settled for listening to their conversation. Rose's voice in particular.
It had always had the strength to calm him down, reassure him, and cheer him up.
It still was the same, even though she was now speaking to some one else and he did not like that person one bit.
"Scor? Scor?"
"Huh?"
"What do you think?"
Regretting not paying attention to Kim's voice, he said, "I think Rose is right?"
"See, I told you"
The conversation continued, and Scorpius tuned one voice out as usual till Al arrived.
Kim, finally had some one to go bother, and took leave, with promises to keep in touch with all of them.
Rose now turned on the two that were sat opposite each other, and said, in a demanding tone, "What's the matter with the two of you? You guys were extremely rude to him. What did he ever do to you?"
"I don't trust him"
"Why not!"
"I just don't"
Huffing, she turned to him, "And you? Do you have a reason that's at least a bit better than 'I don't trust him'?"
Scorpius looked at the plate before him, not willing to meet her eyes.
"We're sorry, Rose. We shouldn't have acted so" was all he could say in consolation.
Not able to find a way to retort to this, Rose turned back to Al, reproaching him for being so damn late.
Indeed, most of Rose's time, both in and out of Hogwarts had been spent in making them stay out of trouble.
Truth be told, Scorpius was afraid of Rose's wrath more that he was of his late grand father's.
"And you! You keep staring behind my head as if searching for some one. Are you even listening to me?"
Her animated and flushed face brought back the memories of the first time he had asked her out, she had reacted the same way, and had hit him on the head with the 'Monster book of monsters', for making fun of her.
He had cared for her then, and he cared for her even more now.
Him trying to overlook it had done no good.
It still raged, stronger than ever, turning his will, decisions, hesitation and restraint to ashes along the way.
He couldn't speak coherently, having realized the truth he had been turning a stone heart to.
And so, he sat, silent once more, listening to Al and Rose argue about his favorite topic, Quidditch.
At last they finished dinner, and Al, offering to pay, left the two alone, in the now dark road outside the Leaky Cauldron.
He knew not how to begin the topic, and wished, more than ever, that he had learnt Legilimency.
She rubbed her palms together, trying to maintain the warmth her cloak was giving her.
"Al is taking too long"
"You know why, don't you?"
"Mmm?" Scorpius asked, genuinely confused.
"Don't tell me you didn't know Al's trying to play match maker again?"
"Match…come again?"
"He thinks that if we meet enough number of times that we will some how get back together again" she said unflinchingly.
She had always been one to get right to the point.
And he had never appreciated it so much as he did now, since it gave him the opportunity he had been so ardently seeking.
"He succeeded the last time, didn't he?"
"No, look where it led us"
"May be it was all for the good"
"You can delude your self of that, Scorpius. I won't"
May be there was the slightest of chances.
"Do you mean to tell me this didn't do us any good?"
"No! May be it gave you the excuse to flirt and date without a care in life, not me! I struggle so hard to convince myself to move on but, what happens? It'll always be, 'he isn't as funny as Scor' or 'he isn't as light hearted as Scor' or, my favorite, 'he isn't as loyal as Scor' I don't even understand why I think that! Damn it! You were the one who broke up with me! I need to move on, I know, but,…if this goes on, I'll murder you if that will help me move on!"
Scorpius listened to her rant, knowing she'd finish with a death threat. She always did.
When he saw that she was not going to stop any time, he took her by the shoulder and, trying to get her to stop, said, "Rose, Rose…don't…look around, people are…"
That was the last straw.
"Staring! Who are you talking about? There's no one here! And what do I care? I'm not like you, Scor. I care about my wishes before others' opinions. If they have a problem, they can go to hell with it!"
"So you don't care about what other people think about us?"
"No! Of course I'm bothered about the reaction of my family, but, I know what they'll say any way!"
"And what would that be?"
His life depended on the answer and he was justly anxious.
"You know it yourself. You've seen for yourself how they reacted the last time"
"So there'll be howlers this time too?"
"Yes…what? Scor, don't. If you're doing this just to give me hope and then destroy it all, then don't. It might be an amusing game for you, but it's me that ends up hurt and devastated"
"If it wasn't the same this time? If I wanted to stay with you forever? If I told you that I loved you? If I…"
Was all he was able to say before the air was knocked out of him as she embraced him.
It was a few minutes before he comprehended what was happening and his hands circled her waist and held her close to him.
Her chuckle was chocked as she withdrew and began beating his chest with her fists.
"Hey, hey! That hurts!"
"Very good. Let it hurt. I should kill you for what you've done but,…"
"You're kind enough to pardon me. Isn't that it?"
Rose narrowed her eyes at him, sensing that he was making fun of her. A mischievous gleam appeared in her eyes and he knew it was no good for him.
"So, why did you suddenly decide that you wanted me back?"
"uh…it's that…"
"You want me to help you?"
This was definitely going to end with his humiliation.
"If I had known jealousy was all it took, I'd have tried it sooner" she said thoughtfully.
"I wasn't jealous!"
His voice sounded false and unnatural even to him.
"Ha! So I was right! You were jealous!"
Lord, Scorpius! You can't just dig your own grave like every one else, can you? You even have to push yourself in!
He was thinking of an immediate means of escape, when Al, oblivious of his friend's dilemma, came out, and seeing them, a large grin appeared on his face.
"I knew it! Ha! James is so going to give me that twenty galleons!"
"You bet on your cousin's life! That was the most insensitive thing to do, Al! And I thought James was the immature one!"
Glad that the focus was finally off him, Scor stood beside Rose, as she continued to scold Al.
And he wondered how he could have ever believed he could live without Rose.
A/n: Review!