Emma: I've been way out of my writing muse, for much too long, so as a come back, of sorts, I'm writing two new one shots centering around my sister Olivia and my own OC, Avery and DJ. If you don't like OC, get lost and leave your flame somewhere else. If you don't mind them, or you've started our other fic "Finding Your Own Glee", and like the girls, then read on, and enjoy. As always, a major thanks to my big sis for editing, and helping me out, and the other one shot will be up, hopefully, soon.
Cause You're Perfect Babe
DJ knew something was up when Puck said he got an "A" on his test; not that she didn't have faith in her boyfriend- quite the contrary, she had more faith in him then anyone in the world -but because she knew how he spoke when he lied. She didn't call him out on it, though, not in front of the guys. As much as a self proclaimed "badass" she was, she was not cruel. She didn't ever want to take the Lauren Zizes mentality, as Noah Puckerman's girlfriend, and hold his balls in her handbag. She didn't take his shit, but she knew when she was being cruel and just being herself. So, she let him go, she let him bounce around the glee club, his friends, and she even let him go to the silly fight with the hockey team idiot. She drew the line at the knife, though.
She was just on her way to snag Puck from Beiste and give him a famous Delilah tell off, when she stopped short in the doorway of the locker room. She heard Puck screaming at Beiste, yelling about how he was no good, not graduating, and not ever going anywhere. She felt her perfectly full lips drop into an "O" of surprise and shock. She covered her mouth, lips now pressed in a firm line and shaking, and watched as Beiste yanked the young man into a hug. Puck started crying, and DJ felt tears prick at her own eyes. His back was to her, but DJ met the tall woman's eyes and watched the coach nod, letting Puck go.
"There's a little gal over there who could do a better job of convincing you, then I can," Beiste said. She turned Puck towards DJ and then took her leave, discretely locking the locker room door behind her.
"Noah…" DJ said. She was surprised she could get any words out with the way her lips were quivering. Puck wasn't much better, his hands balled into fists and shaking, his whole frame rigid and tense, his eyes watery and pouring over every few seconds… DJ couldn't form more words, she simply held open her arms to the Mohwaked boy and he flew into the embrace faster then Sophomore year when he ran to catch the winning goal of their only win. Though DJ was a good foot shorter then Puck, he bent over entirely into her arms, curling himself into her tiny frame and letting her whole being consume him, comfort him. She held onto him tightly, one arm securely around his waist and another around his neck, in an almost too tight grip. Puck had both his arms around her tiny waist, holding in a bruising hold- DJ could already feel a few bruises forming from where his hands spread across her lower back and pressed too hard into the skin there.
"Deej…" Puck whimpered, his lips against her neck, trembling as his tears soaked through the black tanktop she wore. She glanced at the clock, above his shoulders- shoulders she now realized held an entire world -and realized he had been crying nearly twenty minutes. She lifted one hand, tilted his face towards hers, and lifted his chin.
"Don't you ever say the things I just heard you tell Beiste, ever again!" DJ said. She felt her tears finally pool over, creating tracks down her cheeks. Puck's eyes widened in surprise but DJ kept talking, not allowing him to speak again." You are the most amazing, wonderful, fantastic boy I've ever know… You're second only, in my mind, to Avery. You are smart, maybe not in the way everyone expects you to be, but you are smart. You're talented, more than Rachel, Finn, or Artie and Mercedes put together. You're going to be something, baby! But when you start saying you're nothing, that your bastard father was right? It makes me want to go and hurt the people who made you think that, so that they hurt more then you do… Hell, ninety percent of the time I wonder why you're with a girl like me… All I got going for me is brains and a nice voice…"
"Deej!" Puck finally cut in. Now, he took control, his hands flying up to cup her cheeks and turn her watery navy-blue eyes up to his hazel ones. Her lips were quivering out of control now, and a sob-whimper mix slid from between them. Puck realized what was really bothering DJ- besides the fact that he was downing himself and she was his biggest fan; she was realizing all her own insecurities now that Puck had managed to admit his. Puck knew DJ's past- her battles with cutting and anorexia had been deep conversations for the couple on more then one occasion -but he loved her because her past had made her who she was now: the girl he had fallen head-over-ass for. This aside, he knew that she was still insecure about her "flaws" and "imperfections"." Don't say that… You're perfect…"
"If I'm perfect, then you are too," DJ said, her voice cracking from emotion and the tears in her eyes. Puck leaned forward, kissing up her cheeks and across her nose, a path he had done before to pick on her for how cute the splattering of freckles there was. He didn't care that he could taste the salt from her tears, he was trying to convince her of his statement, with actions since he sucked with words.
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The next day, DJ stood in front of the glee club, wringing her hands nervously. She glanced up, meeting Puck's eyes and sighing, her fidgeting stopped a little. She glanced over at Avery, who cupped both her hands into a heart shape and an encouraging smile, as well. She saved Blaine for last, the curly haired boy giving her not a smile or a thumbs up, but a knowing look, one that said everything would be okay. She took another deep breath before turning her attentions towards the entire glee club, again.
"So I asked Mr. Schue if he would let me sing today," DJ started, her voice still a little shaky." And I did that because, recently, a lot of my insecurities came back, because someone I cared about most wasn't telling me his insecurities… And, it made me think… This entire club doesn't really think about their own insecurities. We talk a big game, we say pretty words about acceptance and how we love each other, problems and all; but we don't really, because we never face these problems, or talk about them." DJ paused, swallowing thickly before continuing to the most difficult part." I used to cut myself. And I was anorexic… When I was younger, my mom was married to a guy who treated us badly, I mean beat us, verbally abused us, and even sexually assaulted both of us, at least once or twice. We got out, thanks to some friends and a lot of sneaking, but the damage of being told, every single day of your life, that you're worthless, you don't mean anything… That doesn't just go away… I started cutting, to be in control of some kind of pain. I started starving myself, because I thought no one would care if I withered away and died."
DJ paused once more, glancing up to gauge reactions from all around the room. Artie and Mike were giving her incredulous looks, as if they didn't know who they could hurt for hurting the tiny girl. Tina, Quinn, and Sugar were holding onto each others hands, as if they had to stay connected to someone so they knew this was all real. Mercedes and Sam were holding onto one another, both very close to tears because they had never known any of this. Finn was giving the girl- who he had nearly adopted as his younger sister -a sad and disbelieving look. Santana and Brittany looked ready to yank the girl into one of their famous "lady hugs". Rory and Joe were exchanging equally confused looks, wondering how such a nice girl like DJ had been through this. Kurt was gripping the hem of his shirt tightly, having only heard the briefest of details before, Blaine was beside him, his hand on one of Kurt's knees, but his other in a tight, white, shaking, fist. Puck has both his hands balled into fists and on his knees, and was staring at the ceiling, as if about to stand and bolt because of his anger. Avery's was the reaction DJ hadn't expected, though; the girl, her step sister and her real sister in so many ways, was digging her fingernails so hard into her palms that DJ could see one hand about to bleed, and her eyes were filled with tears, ready to pool over because she was being reminded that she couldn't save DJ from her past, what had already happened.
"Now, I didn't say any of this, for pity, or a reaction, like some people do," DJ said, not even bothering to give a pointed look to the Diva she was directing that at." I just bared my past to make a point. To give you a reason on why I'm singing this song. You see, there's no point in me hiding my past, no reason for me to keep going day to day and grinning ear to ear, like there's nothing wrong. I have bad days, I have my own personal anniversaries that make me want to stay in bed and cry… But if we're as understanding of a club, a family, as we say we are, then I shouldn't have to hide. I should be able to smile, even when I'm crying, look around at you all, and say 'This is me'…"
As if right on cue, the band behind her started up in the slow, slightly sad tune that she was singing. DJ stepped forward from the piano, her body taking on a stronger pose, now, ready to sing to her club, her friends, and her family:
DJ: I've always been the kind of girl
That hid my face
So afraid to tell the world, What I've got to say…
But I have this dream, Right inside of me;
I'm gonna let it show, it's time
To let you know! To let you know!
This is real, this is me,
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now!
Gonna let the light, shine on me!
Now I've found, who I am,
There's no way to hold it in…
No more hiding who I want to be:
This is me…
[ DJ felt tears trailing down her cheeks, but she didn't stop, she kept singing, focusing in on Blaine and Avery, who were now holding onto each other and near tears, as well. She thought about all she had been through, but more importantly the people she had to save her, the ones who had made her who she was now.]
Do you know what it's like
To feel so in the dark
To dream about a life
Where you're the shining star
Even though it seems
Like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
It's the only way
This is real, this is me,
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now!
Gonna let the light, shine on me!
Now I've found, who I am,
There's no way to hold it in…
No more hiding who I want to be:
This is me…
[DJ turned half away from the group, ready to wait out the music break so she could sing again, but she whipped around as Puck joined in the song, walking through the chairs and gleeks to her side, taking her hands and yanking her closer to him. His eyes were determined, and loving, as if trying to tell her he wasn't going anywhere.]
Puck: You're the voice I hear inside my head
The reason that I'm singing
I need to find you, I gotta find you!
You're the missing piece I need,
The song inside of me,
I need to find you, I gotta find you!
[DJ smiled tearfully, joining back into the song with more gusto then before, many of the New Direction members standing to join the couple in their last bit of song. She could make out each individual voice. Each one like a different reason why she'd become the person she is now.]
DJ: This is real, this is me,
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now!
Gonna let the light, shine on me!
Now I've found, who I am,
There's no way to hold it in…
No more hiding who I want to be:
This is me…
Puck: You're the missing piece I need
The song inside of me (DJ: This is me!)
You're the voice I hear inside my head (DJ: This is me, yeah!)
The reason that I'm singing
Both: Now I've found, who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I want to be
This is me!
The room was quiet for a long moment, after Puck and DJ let the final note drop. Then, Avery and Blaine being the first to run over, they all surrounded the couple in a giant New Direction Group Hug. DJ gave a watery laugh as she felt Avery's arms link around her waist, over Puck's own arms, and Blaine's hand find the one that Kurt wasn't holding. She closed her eyes, tucking herself into the warm embrace of her friends, and suddenly, she felt perfect, just like Puck had said, the day before.
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DJ paced nervously outside Puck's classroom with the rest of the New Directions. Beiste had scored the mo-hawked teen another shot at his history final, something that convinced Puck she was an angel in disguise.
"You're gonna wear a groove in the floor, Deej." Avery laughed, leaning on a set of lockers a few feet away from the brunette. Delilah looked up at the blonde and was about to make a famous DJ smartass comment, but the door flew open. Puck stood as if he'd seen a ghost, his face a few shades paler and his fists shaking.
"Well?" Finn asked, eager to know if he was gonna graduate with his best friend or not. Puck slowly brought the hand holding his test paper up for all to see. DJ almost fainted when she saw a big B plus in red ink standing out on the right corner. A big shit eating grin spread out on Puck's face right before he suddenly had an armful of DJ. The small brunette clung to his six foot form as if her life depended on it. Puck laughed and cried happily as he hugged his girlfriend. Seconds later, Avery, Finn, Blaine, Kurt and the rest of the gleeks joined in. A fortress had been built around the resident bad ass. Suddenly, Puck didn't feel much like a bad ass, but rather just another kid ready to take on the world with the best friends any guy could ask for. Cause he knew no matter what life threw at him, he'd always have someone there to help him through it. Noah 'Puck' Puckerman was gonna graduate!
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Emma: Whelp, there ya have it… My little spark of insanity, or genius as some would call it. R&R and all that jazz.