Chapter 1: Very Boring Introduction However You Have To Sit Through This Or Else

Eric was a hot guy. Could this statement be any more obvious!? Mindi was the cutest girl in school. Any questions so far? You, in the back, shut up! Both preteens lived in the worst township of all. It used to be a good neighborhood. Now it is slowly evolving into the f[censored]'in ghetto. Yet they keep it cool. Eric liked Mindi. Mindi liked Eric. Kid in the back, I said shut up! Anyway, Mindi knew that Eric liked her, but Eric didn't know that Mindi liked him. Evil, huh? Back to the story, this all happened on February 30th, 2005. Yo, in the back, shut the f*** up or I'll kick you out of the story! K.I.T.B.: Ah, the h*** with this!
(kid leaves) Anybody else? Okay then, here's our story! Finally. Chapter 2: The Study Date(Dun, dun, dun)
February 30th 2005, 2:33 p.m. Eric and Mindi await the dismissal bell, paying absolutely no attention to their History teacher (who has nothing to do with the story) giving out the five tons of homework that she gives out every night. The bell rings and, at that millisecond, a stampede of students charge up and down the hallways. Eric and Mindi are miserable because today was their study date together. Both were struggling in Geography. Their plan was to stay in sight of each other, but enough space so that people wouldn't get the wrong idea. This would be the first time that Mindi had ever been over to Eric's house. In fact, this would be the first time our two main characters did anything together! Eric, of course, was in front of Mindi to show her the way to his house. Eric was very proud of his role to Mindi. Eric told Mindi that they were going to take a shortcut through the back streets. Mindi: But why? It can be really dangerous back there. Eric: Trust me, I've been back there before. Mindi: Seriously? Eric: No.

Mindi: Then let's not go back there! I mean, how do you even know that it's a shortcut? Eric: I received a note in the mail. It must have been from the government. It was unsigned. Mafia: Piece of cake. Mindi: Who just said that? Mafia: (disguised voice) Nobody. Narrator: Hey, you stole my voice! Mafia: Shut up! Narrator: Okey dokey! Mindi: Whatever! Eric: Let's just go before the chapter ends.

Chapter 3: Now The Real Trouble Starts

Eric and Mindi went through the back streets (obviously). Suddenly, the Mafia popped up, grabbed Eric and put a note on the ground gently. Mindi, being very smart, hid behind a bunch of smelly trash cans. She did not want to become blackmail of the Mafia. The Mafia left and Mindi came out of the trash cans (who wouldn't)! Then, the cops came and Mindi had to hide again. Chief: (reading quietly) To Whom It May Concern: Yo, this is the Mafia. If you are a cop, place the letter down and run or else.
(cops run) Mindi: Hhmm. there must be some clues of Eric's whereabouts in that letter. I don't know any other reason that the cops would come, read the letter, and then run off again.(reading) To Whom It May Concern: Yo, this is the Mafia. If you are a cop, place the letter down and run or else.(talking) Cowards. (reading again) If you still there, then get the h*** over to the old abandoned warehouse on East Benedict Avenue with two dollars. (talking again) What the.? Two dollars? (reading) We only want to buy a slice of pizza to share. Just joshin' ya. We meant two million dollas. We want pizza for the whole f[censored]'in Mafia! Mwa ha ha ha! Mwa ha ha ha! Dun, dun, dun dun, dun, dun dun, dun dun, dun dun.(talking) Enough background music already! Music Guy: Whoops! Sorry! Mindi: I hope I can figure out a plan... and soon! K.I.T.B.: Ha, ha, you talk to yourself! Narrator: Hey, I thought I kicked you out of the story! K.I.T.B.: Well, I decided to come back. Narrator: Okay just.just shut up okay? K.I.T.B.: Okey dokey! Legolas: I've come to save you Elijah, I mean Frodo. Mindi: Wrong story dude. Legolas: Oooohhh.well, can I kill that piece of s*** over there for the heck of it? Narrator: Go right ahead! K.I.T.B.: Nooooo! Mindi: Wait! Orlando, I'm going to need your help. Legolas: What's the catch? Mindi: You can kill the Mafia. Legolas: I'm in. Can I bring Aragorn and Sirius Black along? Mindi: Why? You know that those two will end up killing each other instead of the Mafia. Legolas: The story would be funnier. Mindi: Fine, but let's pass it through with the director. Director: Zzzzzzzzzzzz.....Huh? What? Oh, yeah, sure. Legolas: Thank you! Aragorn: 'Sup Sirius: Hi hi. Aragorn: Why did he have to come? Sirius: Because I'm annoying, that's why. Mindi: Whatever. Let's get down to business. Anybody got two million dollars? Legolas: Nope . Aragorn: Sorry kid. Sirius: I could try to make two million dollars with magic. Aragorn: Like that's ever gonna work. If you tried your magic you could kill somebody. Sirius: Good! Let's try some magic on you! Mindi: Stop it! We need to save my crush before it's too late! K.I.T.B.: Too late for what? Narrator: I said, SHUT UP!! Mindi: I've got an idea. To make this kid shut up, how about he comes with us? K.I.T.B.: Cool! Mr. Director, please can I go? Please? Director: Uh, duh, whatever. K.I.T.B.: Yeah! Sirius: Anyway, abracadabra biggo moneyo, POOF! Aragorn: Now look what you did, you mad that kid disappear! Narrator: And that's a bad thing? Mindi: Duh, he was gonna help us. Narrator: You really think that Mr. Annoying was going to help you guys. Sirius: Hey, I'm Mr. Annoying. Mindi: Guys, I have a plan! We could go into the warehouse, get rid of the Mafia, get Eric, and leave. Aragorn: That's so crazy, but. Legolas: It just might work. Aragorn: Huh? Legolas: Admit it. You were going to say that's so crazy but it just might work. Aragorn: Was not! Legolas: Was too! Aragorn: Okay, so maybe I was. What does that have to do with anything? Legolas: I don't know. Chapter 4: To The Warehouse 8:00 p.m., 220 East Benedict Avenue, Mindi is scared to death. Legolas and Aragorn, however, are excited while Sirius is just being, well, you know, Sirius. Suddenly, Mindi's History teacher pops up. History: Hi Mindi! Where's Eric? Narrator: Hey, I thought I said that you had nothing to do with this story. History: I'm just making sure that Mindi and Eric did their homework. She kept blabbing on and on so Legolas shot her with an arrow and pushed her off a cliff. Legolas: Well, that should bore her for a while. Sirius: What do you mean by bore her? Legolas: It takes three hours to fall to the bottom of that cliff. Aragorn: Great! Now let's get back to business. They stepped inside the warehouse and walked into the bodyguard. The name tag read Patrick Star( upside down). Patrick: Hey, uh, you better, duh..zzzzzzzzzz Mindi: Well, that was pretty easy. Legolas: Let's split up to look in every room to see which one has. psst, what's his name again? Mindi: Eric. Legolas: Oh yeah, to see which one has Eric inside. K.I.T.B.: Dude, didn't you ever watch Scooby Doo? Narrator: Oh, no, you're back! K.I.T.B.: Yup, anyway, whenever the gang splits up, something bad always happens to one of the groups. Mindi: See, I told you he was gonna help us. Narrator: Shut up, okay! So they all crept upstairs and were stopped by a shadowy rectangular tough guy. In fact, the toughest guy in town, Spongebob Squarepants. Spongebob: Yo, I don't think dat you are getting past dis point right here. Sirius: You know, I thought I saw Mrs. Puff holding a drivers license with your name on it. Spongebob: Really?! Aragorn: Yup. Spongebob: Gotta go! Legolas: That seemed very easy as well. Chapter 5: The History Teacher Reincarnated But Nobody Cares So I Won't Talk About It
So, they searched every room in the upstairs and found only dust and cobwebs. Legolas, however, found a plastic bow and arrow set that he vowed to give his future son to use for target practice. The target: a picture of Sirius. Sirius: Hey, that's not funny. Narrator: I was serious Sirius. Sirius: Oh, so it's really going to be a picture of you? Narrator: No, I meant serious as a feeling. Sirius: Oh... Legolas, we need to have a serious talk. Legolas: What about you? Anyway, while Sirius and Legolas were arguing about Legolas' son's target practice, Aragorn, Mindi, and that other kid- K.I.T.B.: You can call me by my name, you know. Narrator: You see, the problem is, well, we don't know your name. K.I.T.B.: Oh, well, the name's Matt. Ok, well, Aragorn, Mindi, and Matt were still searching for Eric. Legolas and Sirius were pushing each other around and Sirius fell down a trap door. Matt: Ha, admit it Narrator, I was right. Mindi: Yea Narrator, say sorry, he helped us. Narrator: I'm still not apologizing. He didn't shut up during Chapter 1. Anyway, Sirius fell into a place that sort of looked like a dungeon and found Eric. Eric: Hey, what are you doing here? Draco: Yea, what are you doing here? My father is paying you good money to teach, not fall down trap doors. Sirius: Hey, my favorite student! Let's go! Draco: Okay! Sirius and Draco left and escaped back into Hogwarts. Eric: Hey, what about me? Draco: What about you? Eric: I need to leave too, don't I? Draco: No. Meanwhile, in the upstairs level. Aragorn: I never thought you'd see the day that I said this , but, we gotta save Sirius! So, they all purposely fell down the trap door and to their surprise. Mindi: Eric!! Eric: Mindi!! Mindi: Eric!! Eric: Mindi!! Mindi: Eric!! Legolas: Is it just me or am I hearing an echo in here? Eric: How glad I am to see you and. who are these people and what are they doing here? Mindi: Well, there's Legolas and Aragorn from L.O.T.R. and there's this kid Matt. Eric: And what does he have to do with anything? Matt: Long story. Mindi: There was also Sirius Black from Harry Potter. Have you seen him anywhere? Eric: Yea, he walked off with Draco Malfoy and left me behind. Aragorn: Traitor. Mindi: Great, just great. Anyway, did you see where they went through to escape? Eric: Well, sort of. They sort of stepped into that shadow over there. So they walked over to "that shadow" and saw two pathways. One was horrible. The stone pathway was cracked and broken. The other pathway was paradise. The road shined with gold. You'll never believe which road they took! They took the road that looked like paradise! Anyway, they were about half-way to the end of the tunnel when they fell down a trap door. Eric: Don't tell me there's another downstairs floor! So they were falling and falling and falling and falling and falling and fall- Mindi: We're done falling now! Ok, so they were done falling and then found themselves at. at the door where they came in? Eric: How does a trap door lead to an upstairs floor?!

Mafia: We're highly technological, okay? Mindi: Uh oh. Legolas: Hey, Mafia, want to take this outside? Spongebob: Bring it on! Patrick: Zzzzzzzzzzzz... So the Mafia (most of them) went outside to challenge Mindi and her fellow travelers. Well it turns out the Mafia was pretty weak and so they were led to the cliff and pushed off. You would think that this is the end, correct? Well, you're wrong. They still need to go home, don't they? Suddenly a speedy Lincoln Continental popped up with a note on the windshield. It read, "Dear Friends, We want to send our greatest apologies for Sirius's behavior. This is to get you back to wherever you wish. Sincerely, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley. Mindi: Aw, how sweet! Aragorn: Let's just get out of here, ok? Our mission is accomplished. Chapter 6: The Mafia Reincarnated And Everybody Cares So I Will Talk About It
Back at the old warehouse, the Mafia grabbed onto a rock and climbed up the very steep cliff. However, they had a very hard time because the history teacher kept bugging them to come on down and roast marshmallows while singing by the campfire. They finally got so annoyed that the head of the gang took a rope (which came out of nowhere), came down the cliff, and beat up the History teacher. When all of the Mafia got to the top of the cliff, they found car tracks in the dust (so it couldn't fly, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley aren't that good at magic.) So the Mafia got in their Viper and- Mindi: Uh oh. Narrator: Stop interrupting me! They got in their Viper and somehow caught up with our group. Eric: Hurry! Legolas: I'm driving as fast as I can! Aragorn: Then drive faster! Legolas: Thanks for all the support guys. So then, all of the sudden, the car disappears and another note popped up. It read, "Sorry, we forgot to tell you. It only lasts five minutes. Sincerely, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley." Mindi: Grrrrrrrrrrr. So the Mafia tried to grab Eric and (since they're in a Viper) sped by and missed. This gave our travelers some time to run to the closest police station at 1723 Hawthorne Avenue. The Mafia made a quick U-turn and drove the direction our little "fellowship" was running. All of the sudden, a little green fox popped up and smiled. He then showed that he had quickly taken out the engine of the Viper. Aragorn smiled back and gave the fox a treat. They continued to run to the police station. By the time the Mafia caught up with the group, they were being arrested. Chapter 7: The End Of Chapter 6 Ended Up Being Too Romantic So I'm Going To Move On
Legolas and Aragorn went back to New Zealand to film the 3rd L.O.T.R. That kid Matt went back to, well, back to wherever he came from. Little did we know that the fox's treat was a treat to make the green fox live forever and have offspring who would be green (Aragorn's favorite color). Patrick was peacefully sleeping at the warehouse when he realized that he was alone. So, he decided to go back to Bikini Bottom. He then went back to sleep. Eric and Mindi got very little sleep that night and both got D pluses on their Geography tests. The important thing now is that they both know that they care about each other. And me, well, I'm living in peace without that kid Matt. Matt: Hi hi. Narrator: NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The End
(or is it? Dun, dun, dun.) Narrator: NO MORE MUSIC! IT'S OVER!! Music Guy: Sooorrry!