Preface:

I think I had known. I think I had always known. I think my heart had always been his. Every touch, every laugh, every thought was his. He had me before I even knew it. He belonged to me. I also knew I never deserved him. Never deserved the love and longing he poured out onto me every day of my short but sweet life. Now when I stood here contemplating this love, he looked down at me with his soft, brown eyes. Who in the entire supernatural world could have fathomed this pairing? Could have believed in its existence? I was all I could ever give him, and it sufficed.

Chapter 1: WHAT HAVE I DONE?

I had always been a little off. I was able to show people pictures in their minds with just one touch of my skin. My thoughts, secrets and visions were completely exposed to anyone. My story telling abilities coincided with the fact that I was technically 8 years old but physically I was about 18. For this mutation, I was never allowed into a "real" school with "real" kids, "real" dances, and "real" drama. Not to say my life was boring. Not in the very least. To be honest, I was probably one of the most interesting beings in the history of mankind or, well, beings. Anyway, I was saying how off I was. Yeah, drinking blood is actually looked down upon in many parts of the world. Also, I guess people perceive me as beautiful but get really shocked when I can speak perfect Latin. What? Runway models can't do that!? Let's also not forget the fact that my parents and immediate family are a vampire coven who ironically are "vegetarians". Having friends that are werewolves did not put me on top of the cool list either. Yeah, it's kind of a downer.

Okay, honestly, I do not even care about half of this stuff. I mean don't get me wrong, I am off. However, I have grown to accept and even love some of my abnormalities. I had the rest of eternity to mull it over if I wanted to, which can be added to the "weirdo" list as well. Eternity – what a controversial concept. The thought of staying young forever and seeing every change in society, technology, etc. was appealing to me. The less appealing part could be argued that eternity changed people's perspectives. In other words, life could not be lived with enthusiasm and passion. As if to say, eternity lead to no purpose in one's life. These thoughts appeared in my head more than once but like I said I had all of eternity to mull over them. Or maybe I just think a little too much about things that are quite possibly trivial. Maybe people should just live their lives and not worry about those kinds of things.

"Ness, come on! We were supposed to leave 15 minutes ago!"

My mother, Bella Cullen, is one of a kind. Her personality is every bit as beautiful as she is. Never have I not felt loved by her. She shows me every chance she can get and is passionate about me. I have loved her with every fiber of my existence ever since I can remember, which was the day I was born so yeah a long time.

"Ness, seriously! Please!" The door opened slightly, and I could make out my mother's thin silhouette. Her soft, pale face pleading me as it peaks around the wooden frame. It is hard to believe but my mother is 18 years older than me. However, right now, it looks as if she could have been my sister. My parents looked way too good for their age.

"Okay, sorry!" She ducked out as soon as I replied. She was probably getting the present wrapped.

Today was Grandpa Charlie's birthday, and we were all going to his house to celebrate. When I say all I mean the whole coven and some friendly neighborhood werewolves. It was going to be fun. It always was.

My mom loved my grandfather almost as much as she loved my father and me. With my obvious and unexplainable growth spurt, Grandpa Charlie was always a little taken aback when he saw me, but he never asked questions. I think deep down though he knew the truth or at least contemplated it.

I got dressed and ready for the big day. It was Grandpa Charlie's 50th birthday. Almost thirty of those years were spent on the Fork's police force. He loved to play off like some tough guy but I know he was a sucker especially for me. I was his only grandchild which I guess would entitle me to a lot of attention. When I was younger, well okay up until about last year, I would always spend almost every weekend with him at his house. He always tried to do activities that I wanted but the days usually ended up with us watching some sporting event on tv. I actually did come to enjoy basketball, football, wrestling, what have you. This tolerance definitely came in handy when I was hanging with the La Push gang.

"Hey beautiful."

"Hey dad." Yes, sigh. My dad has always been a heartthrob. I see the way women look at him when we go out in public. Lately, I have been getting glares from many of these adoring women, which is disgusting. He is my father, and these bimbos think I am with him. Okay, no.

"How are you?" I ask.

"Good. You?" He chuckled at the end. I am sure he heard my thoughts.

"Annoyed with mom. I couldn't put Pride and Prejudice down." I smiled which he returned with no reluctance. It was easy to see why women melted in his presence.

We both joined my mother in the living room of our cottage. The quaint, little place that I had called home for all these years. It was definitely Better Homes and Gardens material. Especially when Grandma Esme kept up on all the minute details. The home was absolutely breathe taking.

She was in the living room putting the finishing touches on the gift. I had went with her the day she picked it out. We had no idea what we were looking for in that electronic store, but that was no problem when almost half the staff came running to us before we stepped five feet into the building. Our knights in shining armor were there to assist us in the best sound and picture quality. It ended quite nicely for mom. She ended up saving half the original price. The sales clerk telling her that it was absolutely no problem and winking at me, saying he would take care of his boss. Now the gift was wrapped, and I could honestly say that the 65" big screen tv was going to make Grandpa Charlie cry.

"Done!" She looked to my father and me for approval.

"Nice wrapping!" I said. "Charlie is going to love it!" my dad followed.

Her smile stretched. "Ready?" We both nodded as she lifted the heavy tv set into her dainty arms. Please, feel free to add that to the "weirdo" list as well.

When we reached the main house, the rest of the family was already in the garage - packing up the two cars with their own presents.

"Oh my God! I love that color on you!" Alice shrieked when she saw me in the yellow sundress. I absolutely loved shopping with my Aunt Alice. Aunt Rose and my mother never enjoyed it quite as much as I did. She had the best advice about hair, makeup, clothes, and boys. Not that I was dating anybody but she always would give in on some secrets of the male mind, but to be honest, there isn't much of a secret there. Men are pretty obvious from what I have observed of my male friends and family. Not much mystery there, sorry.

"I knew it was a good choice. Always go with your instincts."

"Instincts or foresight?" I teased. Jasper who was behind her rolled his eyes mockingly.

She grinned mischievously. "Hmm… maybe both."

We all got into the expensive but necessary, as told to me by the males of this household, cars. The drive to Grandpa Charlie's was short but running was always faster – anywhere.

"We're going hunting this Saturday." Dad told me from the driver's seat. Of course, he heard my need for speed thought.

"Sweet!" I replied. Hunting was an adventure to me. Considering I did not get to go to high school or have many friends outside of my supernatural world, hunting was like a day at an amusement park, which I have been to. Rollercoasters were such a thrill. Mom and dad did not have the same enthusiasm I as I did but Uncle Emmett and Uncle Jasper sure did. We probably rode about twenty different rides that day about five times each. However, we don't go as often as I would like because with the pounding hearts and rushing blood of the surrounding humans it's sometimes hard to concentrate.

As we approached the house, all the lights were on, and it looked like many guests had already arrived. The house looked so out of place for a guy like grandpa. It was decorated with lights and candles in the window. I had a feeling that Alice had been up to something this afternoon. It had some serious potential.

"I'm going to hide the tv." My mom said. She hated surprises but loved giving them.

My dad gave me a knowing grin as we got out of the car and mom went around the back of the house. I felt Grandma Esme's arm around my shoulder. Her persistent beam on her face. I loved my father's parents, or adoptive parents. They were more optimistic than the rest of the family. Their love was what fueled this strange and unearthly family. Even though I knew she hated the smell of food, Grandma Esme always made me something when I was over. For not liking food, she made the best lasagna. My grandfather Carlisle had the biggest heart, metaphorically speaking, of anyone I knew. He was brilliant. Due to my mutation, I have had to be home schooled and Grandpa Carlisle supervised it. When I was little, he would take me on "field trips" to zoos, museums, and forests. There was always something new to learn from him. Lately, we would stay up talking about books, history, and current events. Often, I would fall asleep while debating with him. I loved his views on everything. He was so thoughtful with his responses. If he didn't know something, he would find the answer.

"Hey! Look who's here." Seth, one of my favorite people of all time, greeted us at the door. I had always thought he was cute and very sweet. I wasn't physically attracted to him, just a sibling type of adoration. Besides, he had his arm around Nicole, his imprintee's shoulder. She was tall and beautiful. That was nothing new though. It seemed like all the imprintees were. Her smile was white and perfect.

"Hi, Nessie," she said.

"Hey!" I replied back.

Before I could say anymore, Seth gave me a tight squeeze. His eyes were full of mock worry when he released me. "They grow up so fast don't they?" I had to laugh. Seth was always entertaining.

That's when he saw me. Or heard me rather. "Hey, Ness! Still recovering?" Aww. Jacob Black. Now he was definitely my favorite person of all time. His long, black hair tossed from side to side over his brown skin as he walked towards me. His grin was as big as his face. I think I had every part of his face memorized. There was hardly a time that we went without seeing each other.

"What? Of course. I hope you didn't cry after you left today. I would feel just so awful!" I teased him. Jake and I usually raced anywhere and everywhere. Out of all the things that we had in common, I would say running was number one. Once we both got so caught up in the excitement, we ended up half way through Canada before we knew it. Today was a jog compared to that.

"I always cry when I leave you." He mocked. I couldn't help but feel like he meant it a little. Jake and I were pretty much inseparable. I had known him all my life. He knew everything about me. Even from the time I was born he felt a deep loyalty to me. Enough to give me a bracelet to show it. I had never thought I was a replacement of my mother to him but rather a different kind of friend who he could still show his undying loyalty too. I was never quite told the whole story about the love triangle between my parents and Jacob, but as time went on I was able to pick up the innuendos from Uncle Emmett's jokes. This didn't really bother me, but recently I got a little irritated when it was covertly brought up. I felt protective of Jacob. Jacob Black was a very good friend. He was always like a protector, caretaker, and brother. Of course, by the looks of him, I was grateful that he was not my actual brother. His heartthrob abilities were equal to that of my dad, but with him, I always felt flattered when women thought I was his lover.

"Nessie!" Grandpa Charlie walked over and hugged me tightly.

"Happy birthday, Grandpa!" I chanted.

He put me down, eyed me suspiciously, and looked around a little morbid.

"Yeah. I always think this party is a little overkill." I laughed. Jacob rolled his eyes.

"Charlie! You won't let your loving family do anything else for you for the rest of the year. So what do you expect?" Sue Clearwater was a caring woman but always sharp. Her and grandpa had been dating since I can remember.

"Hey, Nessie. Hey, Jake." She greeted us. I guessed she was in the kitchen working hard on the meal. Jake and I both greeted her warmly, and we all exchanged pleasantries.

"Charlie." She said after. "I need help finding that new baster we bought the other day. I told you to put it in a specific spot but I guess you forgot." Leave it to Sue to put Charlie in his place. She turned to the kitchen. Grandpa followed and rolled his eyes before he left.

"Oh. Turkey!" Jake said as he turned to me, his smile as bright as ever. He was always hungry.

The party was fun. Tons of good times with the whole, in my opinion, extended family. The food was great! Everyone thanked Sue for her cooking expertise. My vampire family politely excluded themselves from the dinner. Saying they "accidently" ate before they came. How convenient, right? Once again, everyone who knew put it off and everyone who I am sure had a little idea also put it off. It was comical to see people's reactions.

After dinner, there was cake. I couldn't tell you if it was good or not because the La Push boys had it all eaten by the time I could get to it. Of course, much to Grandpa Charlie's disappointment, there were gifts. I was right. Grandpa did cry. Well, he got teary but for him that's crying.

We all spread out more and formed groups of people. Some people played cards while others watched tv. I was playing with John and Layla, Sam and Emily Uley's children. I was teaching them how to play jacks. The deal was that every time they won I had to show them a vision and every time they lost… Well, I still had to show them a vision. They love it when I show visions. It's the coolest thing in the world to them. It wasn't until John said something that I realized Jake had left my side – a phenomenon in itself.

"I don't know." I said looking around to find him. "Maybe he went to go get more food."

To answer our confusion about thirty seconds later, he entered the house looking slightly off guard.

"What happened to him?" John asked me. He was very intuitive for being six.

If only to increase my confusion, my parents came in after him looking both confused and frustrated. I wondered what could cause such emotion on my families faces during this great party. I knew my parents and Jake had their differences from time to time, but the look on their faces was completely troubled. What now? I thought. Hearing my thought, my father looked over at me. His face became more worried in the process. Did I do something? He shook his head to answer me. Whew! Okay! Well then what? He looked away. All three of them not making eye contact with me for the rest of the party.

The car ride home was quite. Too quite. What was on their minds? As we got out of the car, I realized the wordless aroma was contagious as I looked at the rest of my families faces. Whatever! I was probably too young to understand. Too young? I could read Hemmingway at the age of 1.

We all said our goodbyes and "I love yous" before setting off to the cottage. Man, even Uncle Emmett was speechless. Something was up.

When we got back to the house, it got even weirder. I was about to pull the covers over my head when my parents walked into my room.

"Hey?" I said confused, but hoping for answers.

"Hey, babe." My mom said. "Can we talk?"

"Sure." I replied looking from her to my father. His face was blank. Her face was beautiful but pained.

"We have never really talked about… dating with you. It had never been an issue until recently." My mom said looking uncomfortable. I knew this talk would eventually come but honestly I didn't know any boys other than the ones from La Push and the occasional visitor. Even so, I did not want to have this conversation with them, no matter how much people thought we were friends rather than parents and child.

"Mom, it's okay. You and dad don't have to worry. I'm not interested in anyone." I assured them.

"Hear your mother out, Nessie." My father said still blank faced. I could tell he didn't want to be in this situation anymore than I did. I turned back to her.

"We realize that things have… changed especially with your body." She blurted the last part out abruptly.

"I realize you know about dating, boys, and… sex." She added the last one with regret. "You are a smart kid. However, when you find the right guy," She stole a glance at my father. "It will be new for you, for all of us" She added looking at my father again. "We want you to know we support you with every decision."

I looked to my father uncomfortably. Blank stared back. "Okay." I replied. "Thanks." I was so confused. I was not dating anyone let alone making a decision.

After a moment of awkward silence, they got up. My mom touched her heart. "Whatever you do, always follow this." Wow! Kind of corny, but that was my mom – very passionate.

"Okay." That was my only response. I tried to go over in my head if I had made any new guy friends recently, and what exactly did I do or say to him to make my parents think I wanted to start dating? However, I was very tired and went to sleep before I could go through the short list of boys that I knew.