ANIME PERVS!
By Winter Knight
Chapter 1: "First Strike!, Peeping in the shower for kicks!"
Note: I do not own these characters nor anime pervs.
Even though I had a terrible break-up, I am not misogynist, nor do I promote misogyny in my story, the pervertedness is just played for laughs.
I had a idea for this story many years ago but I think it's time to test this story out. It is a parody of "Time Pervs" from Camp Chaos' "Vh1 ILL-ustraited" The Time Pervs are Bill Clinton, Larry Flynt, and Pee-Wee Herman, history's biggest pervs.
Also this chapter is a parody/ tribute to the greatest comedy of all time..."PORKY'S"!
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(prologue)
Throughout the Anime worlds, there are many perverted perverts out there perving out, but what if there are some who unite in groups in order to make perving out even easier? Enter the Anime pervs, each one has a theme and ways of perving but this group the story focuses on are the "Rumiko Takahashi Division" and this is their story...
(theme song opens)
Three pervs in a magical wheelchair,
perving out on the chicks of anime,
ANIME PERVS!
ANIME PERVS!
Miroku, Ataru, and Happosai,
getting their kicks,
they are the Anime Pervs!
ANIME PERVS!
ANIME PERVS!
ANIME PERVS!
(theme song ends)
One day in Ataru Moroboshi's room, Ataru and Miroku are looking up manga for "reasearch" and then Happosai shows up and says "Fellow perverts, I have a idea for the perving of the lifetime... TO THE NERIMA BATH-HOUSE!" And then Ataru then says "Ha! good thing Lum and her friends are away now I can play with you guys...I got the nightvision goggles ready!" And Miroku smirks and says "perhaps I shall find someone to bear my child with in the Bath-house, I'm game!"
So the gang ditch the idea to travel into the "Naruto" world and go for peeping in the local bathhouse...
The guys then pretend to bath but then when no one's looking, Miroku, Ataru, Happosai silently drill into the other side and one they witness "the beaver shoot" Happosai whispers "Anime Pervs...commence perving!" And the three dool and gaze upon nature in all of it's beauty...but mostly their "gazooms." However Ataru has a hard time because he discovers his view is being blocked by Kodatchi Kuno and she is recognized by her laugh. Happosai then says "what's wrong my boy? Kodatchi has a "tighty patootie"! And Ataru then says "Have you seen this woman up close? She is as demented as Mendou's sister and even worse than Sugar, Pepper, and Ginger...those girls who used to plague Lum back on her planet... hey gramps, let me see your view!" Happosai then says "And make me lose sight of Akane's "Love Pillows", you got to be more insane than Kodatchi herself!" Ataru is about to ask Miroku and then he says "Not now Moroboshi, I'm window shopping for the one who can bare my children."
Ataru is then furious that he has to try to view "the beaver shot" while dodging the view of Kodatchi's "bodunkadunk". Ataru tried and tried his hardest to view "the promised land", but is unable to due to Kodatchi Kuno's backside. He then stupidly yells out "GD DAMMIT WILL YOU MOVE YOUR INSANE ASS!" And then this blows their cover and Miroku and Happosai stare in fear at Ataru. Akane Tendo then says "YOU BASTARDS! I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO STOP PERVING ON US!" Kagome then asks "Is that you Happosai" And then Happosai says "Umm...I'm the breast inspector, I'm here to check on size, density, and hygine." Ukyo then frowns and says "It's Happosai all right!" And Nabiki then says "Hey Happosai isAtaru there? you better close his eyes or else he'll get confused (the women laugh)"
Miroku then gets a idea, he sticks his tounge out through his "peep-hole" and then Nabiki puts wasabi on and he gags on the spicy sauce as the girls laugh out loud. Ataru then gets a really perverted idea and he pulls his pants and underwear down and he inserts his...umm... "Hitomi" (japanese word for "Cyclops" or "one eyed-monster") through his "peep-hole" and as he insanely giggles at what he's doing, the girls are shocked and disgusted at what they are seeing. Happosai and Miroku then see the girl's reactions and then Lum suddenly appears from another part of the women's side and Akane whispers something to Lum that makes her angry and she points at Ataru's "winky" that is sticking out of the peephole". Lum is so furious she is going towards it.
Miroku and Happosai are delighted by this sight and Happosai says "Umm... Shampoo is in the bathhouse and she just saw your "Hitome" and now she's gonna grab it!" Ataru grins more insanely and says "Oh man! the idea of Shampoo grabbing my "one eyed monster", makes my "one eyed monster" even more monsterous!" Miroku then says "Ok, she's going for it...going for it... and... (Lum grabs Ataru's "winky") SHE GOT IT! By the way Moroboshi it's really your wife... good luck buddy!" And so Happosai and Miroku leave Ataru iin this predictament and Lum screams "I KNOW IT'S YOU DARLING! I GOT YOU NOW DARLING! I TOLD YOU TO STAY AWAY FROM THOSE PERVERTS AND NOW YOU WILL RECIEVE "DIVINE RETRIBUTION"! So Lum uses her powers to shock Ataru through his "winky" and he manages to escape and run off.
Hours Later...
Ataru returns to his home and he sees Miroku and Happosai tied up. Ataru goes up to them, flips thim off and says "YOU BASTARDS! YOU LEFT ME WITH LUM! OUR PERVINGOUT PLAN HAS FAILED! HOW CAN WE PERV OUT IF YOU REFUSE TO WORK AS A TEAM?" Miroku then somehow gets his gag off and says"RUN AWAY!" Ataru then hears a voice and says "You guys might not work as a team but we do!" And behind Ataru was Lum, Nabiki, Akane, and Kagome, all smiling in a evil way. Lum then says "I live here too Darling, don't forget that! let's punish them girls!" Ataru, Miroku and Happosai then scream in fear for what is in store for them but it involves Akane turning off the lights and mallets...lots and lots of mallets.
Meanwhile the punishment is being witnessed by Jiraiya, Sanji, and Master Roshi of "Shonen Jump division" and Shin-chan, Parco Fulgore, and Mr. Kimura of "Misc. division" . They laugh at their punishment and Master Roshi says "man, and I thoght I was a dirty old man!" The two divisions then look at eachother with hate in their eyes for they really hate competition!
THE END...?
If you want to see more Anime Sex-ipades and more perverted humor, write to me and respond to this!