Okay, so this is a series of collected, unrelated ficlet pieces I've written over the years. They are silly and ridiculous and full of much glee—theoretically, anyway.
SG-1 as Robin Hood and his Merry Men. Because Lyssie asked for it and suddenly, the image of Jack in tights wouldn't go away. November 3, 2004
"How did this happen?"
"I'm not entirely sure," Sam said as she looked down at the tunic and tights she found herself wearing. "I think you're dreaming."
Jack considered his outfit and shuddered. "If I'm dreaming, why did my subconscious put me in tights?"
She smirked. Man, he really was starting to rub off on her. "Good point. Maybe it's my dream." Then she ogled him. Definitely a dream, then.
He started to raise an eyebrow, but Teal'c, as usual, beat him to it before examining the large wooden staff he was holding. "This seems to be a most ineffective weapon, O'Neill."
"Yeah well, the name Little John never made any sense either, T. Though you fit the role rather well, I think."
Teal'c bowed. Because really, there wasn't anything else to do.
"Hey, where's Danny?"
"He's hiding behind the bushes over there," Sam said, gesturing vaguely.
"Why? If I can prance around in green tights, then I'm sure…."
"Forget it, Jack! I'm not coming out!"
"Hey, we're all wearing tights, Danny boy. Don't be so grouchy. At least we get bows and arrows and stuff to go with them."
"Actually sir, I have throwing knives."
"And I don't have either, so forget it!"
Jack sighed and signaled to Teal'c, who with a bow, reached over and pulled Daniel out of the bushes.
"Damnit Teal'c!"
"My apologies, Daniel Jackson."
Daniel shifted uncomfortably, trying to keep the breeze from blowing up the voluminous skirts of the blue dress he was wearing and glare at them all at the same time. Jack was so stunned he couldn't even come up with a good barb. Instead, he turned to Sam.
"What the hell did you eat before bed, Carter!"