Kuja and the Lost World of PBS
by Feathery Kuja
A/N: G'Day mates!! I do not own Kuja(though that would be cool) or Zidane or the....TELETUBBIES!! Hee Hee. I hope you enjoy the story and remember to review it so I know how badly it sucked.
"Ugh, why is this stupid show always on?" Kuja asked in an annoyed tone as the hated Teletubbies danced around on the television.
"I don't know." Zidane said sitting down on the floor next to him.
"I guess they're the most popular show or something," he said becoming intranced by the jumping fatties.
"Well we gotta stop them!" Kuja said standing up. "The Teletubbies must be destroyed!"
"Yeah!" Zidane said springing to his feet and throwing his fist into the air.
He accidently punched Kuja and he screamed.
"Ouch! Oh my God, what was that for?!"
Zidane stared blankly at him for a moment. "We must stop the Teletubbies!" he yelled running out the door doing an Indian battle cry.
Into the Television
"Tonight....we move," Kuja said grimly as they looked down at a map in a dark room.
"Hey, move the flashlight, I can't see Teletubbie Land!"
"Oh, sorry," Zidane said tearing his eyes away from the Briteny Spears concert long enough to fix the flashlight on the map.
"So, what are we doing again?" he asked.
Kuja groaned. "How many times do I have to tell you? At twelve 'o' clock we go into the t.v. set while the Teletubbie show is on. From there, we hunt down the little balls of flab in their own perverted world and annihilate them."
"Oh..." Zidane said understanding. "But how do we get back out?"
"Uh...I'm sure we'll find a way."
Twelve 'o' clock
Kuja and Zidane stood in front of the television set as the big grandfather clock struck twelve.
"Here goes nothing..." Kuja said jumping in.
Zidane was staring at the t.v. set in a trance (trance, not Trance) as the bloated little creatures called the Teletubbies ate their Tubbie-toast. "They are so fugly..." he muttered jumping into the t.v. after his brother.
There was a flash of blue light and they were standing in the middle of a hilly field.
Kuja looked around. "Ugh, I can actually feel that stupid baby burning my skin," he said looking up at the sun covered with a happy infant's face.
"Dental floss." Zidane belched/spoke. "So where do we go from here?" he said looking around for anything he knew.
"This place is totally covered in hills. We could be searching for days,"
"Uh...they're probably in their house right now. It looks like a big green hill..." he said staring at all the big green hills around them.
Just then they heard a weird bouncing noise and something came over one of the ridges. It was a fat yellow Teletubbie bouncing a big orange ball.
They both looked at it and gasped. It laughed retardedly at the sight of them.
"Are you laughing at me?!" Zidane yelled over to it. "Then feel the wrath of Zidane!!"
They began to charge the blubbery thing down when it yelled "Eh- oh!" and began a sad attempt to run away. Zidane jumped on the
unworthy beast's back and began to attack it with the Ultima weapon which he just happened to have.
The Teletubbie fell to the ground ten minutes later. "Ahh!" Kuja yelled as another fat thing ran at them.
This one was green and was swinging a red purse.
"Dipsy kill you all!" it yelled in a strangled voice. It charged them down and crushed Kuja.
"Ahh!" he yelled again. "I've been hit... I can't go on..." he said, his head rolling to the side.
"KUJA!!" Zidane shrieked. He turned back towards the green pile of useless mush. "I'LL GET YOU NOW!!" he screamed rushing forward and totally nailing the thing with the Ultima weapon. "THAT ONES FOR MY BRO!!"
The Teletubbie roared like Godzilla and sent Zidane flying back into a bed of yellow daffodils.
Kuja slowly regained concsiousness and sat up. He surveyed the Dipsy thing which was now foaming at the mouth and then he saw Zidane lying dead-like in the flowers.
Kuja gasped and jumped up. "YOU KNOCKED OUT MY BROTHER AND ME?! THAT'S THE LAST STRAW, YOU HAIRLESS FREAK!"
A purple tint surrounded him and the next moment he was in Trance (Trance, not trance). He floated up into the air and cast Ultima, sending a glowing orb straight at the Tubster.
It fell backwards and began to disintigrate. Zidane came out of his faint and stood up. "Whoa, that was sweet!" he squealed.
"Yeah, but there's still two more left....we gotta get em all..."
Zidane began to jump up and down chanting: "Gotta catch em all! Gotta catch em all! POKEMON!!"
Kuja shrieked in pain and covered his ears. "NO!! ANYTHING BUT THE POKE-DUDES!!"
"Oh, sorry, bro," Zidanes said walking up to him. "I forgot you had a horrible alergy about Pokemon,"
Kuja screamed again and fell to the ground.
"Oops," Zidane said not taking any meaning to the oops, and then walked on.
They walked over a big hill and saw yet another big hill with a hole in the top.
"That's their home," Kuja said staring at it like it was Mount Rushmore or Chucky Cheese or something.
"If we get in there then we might be able to get the others."
Zidane yelled in panic and turned around. A red and a purple Teletubbie were running at them with full force.
"YOU KILL LALA AND DIPSY WE KILL YOU!!"
"I'm gonna take you both down, you t.v. signal broadcasting monsters!!" Zidane screamed running forward.
"And I shall assist you, dear brother!" Kuja said flying towards the tubbies.
Zidane hit the red one with his sword-thing and Kuja used Ultima on the purple one.
The two colorfull flab-pies began to roar like t-rex and attack their attackers.
"Why you little-" Zidane said as a huge dark shadow passed over them. It was the Invincible!!
"Oh..." Kuja said looking up. "Daddy! Daddy!! You've come to save me!!"
The pug-fugly ship landed and Garland stepped out. "That's right, my little Genome," he said cutely.
"Aww," Kuja said giggling a little.
There was a flash of red light and both Teletubbies lay dead in the grass.
"Wow! How'd ya do that?" Zidane asked. "That was so sweet it was like sour!"
"I suppose," Garland said. "Now, come along. This place blows,"
They all climbed into the Invincible and left Teletubbie Land forever.
The End (Or is it..? MWA HA HA HA)
A/N: G'Day mates!! I do not own Kuja(though that would be cool) or Zidane or the....TELETUBBIES!! Hee Hee. I hope you enjoy the story and remember to review it so I know how badly it sucked.
"Ugh, why is this stupid show always on?" Kuja asked in an annoyed tone as the hated Teletubbies danced around on the television.
"I don't know." Zidane said sitting down on the floor next to him.
"I guess they're the most popular show or something," he said becoming intranced by the jumping fatties.
"Well we gotta stop them!" Kuja said standing up. "The Teletubbies must be destroyed!"
"Yeah!" Zidane said springing to his feet and throwing his fist into the air.
He accidently punched Kuja and he screamed.
"Ouch! Oh my God, what was that for?!"
Zidane stared blankly at him for a moment. "We must stop the Teletubbies!" he yelled running out the door doing an Indian battle cry.
Into the Television
"Tonight....we move," Kuja said grimly as they looked down at a map in a dark room.
"Hey, move the flashlight, I can't see Teletubbie Land!"
"Oh, sorry," Zidane said tearing his eyes away from the Briteny Spears concert long enough to fix the flashlight on the map.
"So, what are we doing again?" he asked.
Kuja groaned. "How many times do I have to tell you? At twelve 'o' clock we go into the t.v. set while the Teletubbie show is on. From there, we hunt down the little balls of flab in their own perverted world and annihilate them."
"Oh..." Zidane said understanding. "But how do we get back out?"
"Uh...I'm sure we'll find a way."
Twelve 'o' clock
Kuja and Zidane stood in front of the television set as the big grandfather clock struck twelve.
"Here goes nothing..." Kuja said jumping in.
Zidane was staring at the t.v. set in a trance (trance, not Trance) as the bloated little creatures called the Teletubbies ate their Tubbie-toast. "They are so fugly..." he muttered jumping into the t.v. after his brother.
There was a flash of blue light and they were standing in the middle of a hilly field.
Kuja looked around. "Ugh, I can actually feel that stupid baby burning my skin," he said looking up at the sun covered with a happy infant's face.
"Dental floss." Zidane belched/spoke. "So where do we go from here?" he said looking around for anything he knew.
"This place is totally covered in hills. We could be searching for days,"
"Uh...they're probably in their house right now. It looks like a big green hill..." he said staring at all the big green hills around them.
Just then they heard a weird bouncing noise and something came over one of the ridges. It was a fat yellow Teletubbie bouncing a big orange ball.
They both looked at it and gasped. It laughed retardedly at the sight of them.
"Are you laughing at me?!" Zidane yelled over to it. "Then feel the wrath of Zidane!!"
They began to charge the blubbery thing down when it yelled "Eh- oh!" and began a sad attempt to run away. Zidane jumped on the
unworthy beast's back and began to attack it with the Ultima weapon which he just happened to have.
The Teletubbie fell to the ground ten minutes later. "Ahh!" Kuja yelled as another fat thing ran at them.
This one was green and was swinging a red purse.
"Dipsy kill you all!" it yelled in a strangled voice. It charged them down and crushed Kuja.
"Ahh!" he yelled again. "I've been hit... I can't go on..." he said, his head rolling to the side.
"KUJA!!" Zidane shrieked. He turned back towards the green pile of useless mush. "I'LL GET YOU NOW!!" he screamed rushing forward and totally nailing the thing with the Ultima weapon. "THAT ONES FOR MY BRO!!"
The Teletubbie roared like Godzilla and sent Zidane flying back into a bed of yellow daffodils.
Kuja slowly regained concsiousness and sat up. He surveyed the Dipsy thing which was now foaming at the mouth and then he saw Zidane lying dead-like in the flowers.
Kuja gasped and jumped up. "YOU KNOCKED OUT MY BROTHER AND ME?! THAT'S THE LAST STRAW, YOU HAIRLESS FREAK!"
A purple tint surrounded him and the next moment he was in Trance (Trance, not trance). He floated up into the air and cast Ultima, sending a glowing orb straight at the Tubster.
It fell backwards and began to disintigrate. Zidane came out of his faint and stood up. "Whoa, that was sweet!" he squealed.
"Yeah, but there's still two more left....we gotta get em all..."
Zidane began to jump up and down chanting: "Gotta catch em all! Gotta catch em all! POKEMON!!"
Kuja shrieked in pain and covered his ears. "NO!! ANYTHING BUT THE POKE-DUDES!!"
"Oh, sorry, bro," Zidanes said walking up to him. "I forgot you had a horrible alergy about Pokemon,"
Kuja screamed again and fell to the ground.
"Oops," Zidane said not taking any meaning to the oops, and then walked on.
They walked over a big hill and saw yet another big hill with a hole in the top.
"That's their home," Kuja said staring at it like it was Mount Rushmore or Chucky Cheese or something.
"If we get in there then we might be able to get the others."
Zidane yelled in panic and turned around. A red and a purple Teletubbie were running at them with full force.
"YOU KILL LALA AND DIPSY WE KILL YOU!!"
"I'm gonna take you both down, you t.v. signal broadcasting monsters!!" Zidane screamed running forward.
"And I shall assist you, dear brother!" Kuja said flying towards the tubbies.
Zidane hit the red one with his sword-thing and Kuja used Ultima on the purple one.
The two colorfull flab-pies began to roar like t-rex and attack their attackers.
"Why you little-" Zidane said as a huge dark shadow passed over them. It was the Invincible!!
"Oh..." Kuja said looking up. "Daddy! Daddy!! You've come to save me!!"
The pug-fugly ship landed and Garland stepped out. "That's right, my little Genome," he said cutely.
"Aww," Kuja said giggling a little.
There was a flash of red light and both Teletubbies lay dead in the grass.
"Wow! How'd ya do that?" Zidane asked. "That was so sweet it was like sour!"
"I suppose," Garland said. "Now, come along. This place blows,"
They all climbed into the Invincible and left Teletubbie Land forever.
The End (Or is it..? MWA HA HA HA)