This was written for 'The Virginity Challenge'. I chose all three options (Loss of virginity, staying a virgin and virginity kink).

Warnings: Incest, non-consensual, rape, swearing. Don't say I didn't warn you!

Fulfillment and Emptiness

It was the beginning of January and the weather was like something you'd see on a beautiful hand-made Christmas card, only windier. It was really something to look at through the window of Gryffindor tower—Sirius Black found himself watching the snowfall more and more often. He found the little white snowflakes fascinating. He sat on the windowsill in stunned silence as he watched.

Sirius had a thing for snow. He was sure that it stemmed from his fascination with purity and impurity. He didn't know where his little obsession had come from but an obsession it was.

The seventh-year Gryffindor spent a lot of his time trying to suss out whether his classmates were virgins or not. It wasn't that weird, as he reminded himself. It was just an odd little kink of his. Sirius was most definitely not a virgin, and he took pride in that fact. He had an ever-growing list—in his head of course—of virgins he'd slept with. He revelled in the fact that he was the one who took their virginity. The more virgins Sirius slept with, the better he felt. He found it to be the biggest turn-on.

Sirius didn't have a preference when it came to who he slept with. He could be sleeping with a one-eyed centaur for all her cared—so long as said centaur was a virgin. He'd slept with people of all houses and blood statuses. He'd slept with females, and he'd slept with males. He'd slept with older women and men. Something that also turned Sirius on was sleeping with people that he wasn't supposed to sleep with.

So that was why Sirius found himself thinking about his brother on the wintry afternoon as he stared at the snowflakes outside. Sirius was getting a little bored of sleeping with virgin Hufflepuff girls with blonde hair and rosy cheeks. Sure, they were cute, but he wanted to try something different—something bad and wrong, but deliciously so.

Sirius stared at his reflection and made a vow to himself—he would fuck Regulus Black before the end of January. Sirius didn't break vows.

"Hey," Sirius said as he sauntered into the classroom that he asked Regulus to meet him in. "Little bro."

Regulus raised an eyebrow at him and folded his arms. "What is it?"

Sirius cleared his throat and moved swiftly towards his younger brother, placing a hand down on the desk next to Regulus. They were only inches apart. Sirius could almost taste Regulus's sweet breath and it was tantalising.

"Are you a virgin, Reg?" Sirius asked, cocking his head to the side in interest. Regulus went slightly pink at the question, and Sirius couldn't help but find this side of Regulus to be completely adorable.

"I—what—Sirius, why do you need to know that?" Regulus demanded.

Sirius bit his lower lip softly and edged dangerously closer to Regulus. "Because," he murmured, running his hand up Regulus's arm, "I like sleeping with virgins."

Regulus's eyes widened and he tried to take a step back, but the desk was in the way. "Sirius, I'm your brother."

"Oh, I know," Sirius smirked. "Believe me, I know. I want you."

Regulus reached out and shoved Sirius away from him, looking utterly disturbed. "That's er, nice… but I have to go…"

"At least consider it," Sirius whispered just loud enough for Regulus to hear. "I know you want me, too."

Sirius watched as Regulus shook his head and walked out of the room, but he could not ignore the red tint in Regulus's cheeks. His brother was going to be a challenge, and Sirius was a Gryffindor—challenges were his forte.

It wasn't until a week later that Sirius managed to corner Regulus again. Sirius had used the Marauder's Map to track the Slytherin down. It turned out that Regulus had been in the corner of the library browsing one of the aisles. Sirius hurried over to the library quicker than a Seeker who's just caught sight of the snitch.

When he reached the library and found the aisle that Regulus was browsing through, he took a quick look to make sure nobody could see him and then barged down the aisle. Regulus didn't even get a chance to react before he was being shoved roughly up against the wall, the book in his hand dropping to the floor with a quiet thud.

Sirius pinned his younger brother's hands up above his head and pressed his body against Regulus's, groaning inwardly at the feeling. His eyes landed on Regulus's. The Slytherin looked terrified, and for some reason that seemed to turn Sirius on even more.

"Sirius," Regulus whispered frantically, "please don't do this."

"Don't do what?"

"You're my brother," Regulus replied, blinking tears out of his eyes. "I don't want you to think of me in that way. Please, Sirius."

Sirius didn't let Regulus's tears get to him. Instead, he just smirked down at his brother. The position they were in was turning Sirius on, and badly. Sirius was the stronger one, and the fact that he had Regulus pinned against the wall with no escape was extremely exciting for him.

"I know you want me, Reg," Sirius growled. "Let it happen."

Regulus shook his head furiously and he started sobbing. Sirius loosened his grip and frowned. "Don't cry, Reg, you're ruining it."

"You're ruining it, Sirius," Regulus sniffed, looking devastated. "Our relationship."

Sirius sighed and let his brother go. Regulus didn't stop to pick up his book—he ran and ran, and from the look of the Marauder's Map, he didn't stop running until he was safe in the Slytherin common room.

Sirius's original plan to sleep with Regulus by the end of January had to be amended. After several more encounters like the one in the library, Sirius decided that he needed a little more time. He would have to change his game—Regulus wasn't easy to win over with Sirius's lustful charms.

It was February, and Sirius decided that instead of having a one-night stand with Regulus, he'd go for something a little more conventional—a relationship. Sirius was a virgin when it came to relationships. They just weren't his thing.

So when Sirius looked at the Marauder's Map one day and found his brother sitting on the edge of the Quidditch pitch, Sirius decided that today would be the day.

When he reached Regulus, he suddenly felt nervous. He went to sit down on the grass with him, but when Regulus spotted him, he hastily stood up.

"Reg—"

"—I have to be somewhere," Regulus muttered, looking anywhere but Sirius as he tried to make a quick escape. Sirius grabbed Regulus's arm and turned him round so that they were facing one another.

"I'm sorry," Sirius said softly. "I've been acting a bit weird."

Regulus snorted. "A bit?"

"It's only because I love you," Sirius replied. "I mean, I'm in love with you."

Regulus sighed. "You're not in love with me."

"I am," Sirius lied. It hurt him a little to lie to his brother in this way, but his obsession was so overwhelming. He needed Regulus. He needed to take away Regulus's innocence.

"But we're br—"

"—Brothers," Sirius finished, reaching for Regulus's hand and squeezing it. "So what? I want to be with you."

He watched as Regulus seemed to consider this. He watched his younger brother argue internally with himself, his eyes closed. When Regulus opened his eyes, he smiled a little.

"I have to admit, I've been feeling things lately when you have been trying to seduce me."

"Will you be mine?" Sirius asked.

"It's so wrong, Sirius."

"Not if it feels right."

Regulus sighed and smiled. "Okay. But if it doesn't feel right, we can just go back to being brothers… yes?"

Sirius grinned from ear to ear. "Yes!"

He was one step closer.

From that moment, their relationship blossomed like the flowers that grew as Spring approached. Sirius was falling in love with Regulus for real, and that scared him. In his lifetime, he had kissed hundreds of people, but never once did he feel the way he did when he kissed Regulus for the first time.

Regulus seemed to be falling for Sirius, too. Everything in their little bubble was just perfect.

Everything, except for one thing—Sirius was horny. He spent almost every hour of every day fantasising about ripping Regulus's clothes off and fucking him into oblivion.

But he couldn't, and this angered Sirius greatly. The only reason he had started this whole relationship was to sleep with him, and he was getting nowhere.

"Regulus," Sirius said one day as they sat together at the Three Broomsticks. "I want to have sex."

Regulus blushed a little and cleared his throat. "Way to be discreet."

"It's killing me. I need to fuck you."

"Sirius, calm down," Regulus murmured, glancing cautiously around the pub. "You know I'm not ready."

"Why?" Sirius growled angrily. "I need you."

"I'm a virgin," Regulus whispered. If this was supposed to be a deterrent, it was failing miserably at being one. Regulus being pure and innocent was what turned Sirius on the most. Oh, how he wanted to shove him up against the table and—

"Sirius?"

Sirius broke away from his fantasy. "Why don't you want me to fuck you?"

"Please don't say it like that," Regulus muttered. "It's more than that."

"It's really not," Sirius whined. "I've done it a million times and I'm bloody horny, Reg. I've never gone this long without it."

Regulus sighed. "I have my reasons."

"And they are?"

"One—I'm not ready to do… that. Two—if we did it, we could never go back to being just brothers again. Three—I don't have a clue what I'm doing."

"You don't have to do a thing," Sirius said, trying to keep his breathing even. "Just lie there and let me fuck the brains out of you."

"Sirius!" Regulus hissed, embarrassed.

Sirius shrugged. "Just saying, I can't wait any longer."

"Well, you'll have to."

Sirius gritted his teeth and slammed his fist down onto the table, making Regulus jump. "I need it, Reg. I need to fuck you."

Regulus looked a little scared at this. He stood up, staring down at Sirius's angered face. "You will wait or you won't have me at all," he said firmly, turning on his heel and walking away.

Sirius didn't like being talked to in that way. He was long overdue a love-making session with Regulus. He deserved it for having to wait so long.

That was when Sirius decided that Regulus was going to lose his virginity tonight, whether he liked it or not.

Thursday the seventh of May. That was the day that Sirius made the biggest mistake of his life. Oh, how he wished more than anything that he could take it back.

He met Regulus outside the empty History of Magic classroom as they usually did on Thursday evenings. Regulus was looking rather annoyed—probably because of the conversation they had had earlier that day.

Sirius smiled at him, took his hand and dragged him into the classroom. When the door shut behind them, Regulus turned to Sirius and folded his arms.

"About earlier, I think that you should apologise."

Sirius smirked. "Apologise? For what? Wanting you so bad?"

"For trying to force me into something I don't want to do," Regulus replied. Sirius edged closer to him, backing him into a corner.

"It doesn't really matter what you want," Sirius whispered, his eyes shining brighter than ever. "I'm having you, right now."

Regulus visibly swallowed hard and Sirius watched as his frightened eyes darted around the room, looking for some sort of escape, but he was cornered. Sirius knew that he shouldn't be doing this, but the very thought of doing it was irresistible.

Virgins turned Sirius on, and Regulus was a virgin. Kinky things also turned Sirius on, and the thought of forcing his brother to have sex with him was the kinkiest thing that Sirius could possibly think of.

"Sirius," Regulus said. "Please."

Sirius only smirked back at him, and soon he was pinning Regulus against the wall again. Soon, Regulus was sobbing again.

Regulus used all of his strength in an attempt to shove Sirius off, but it was all in vane—Sirius was much stronger.

"Don't do this to me!" Regulus yelled, tears rolling down his face.

"Stop complaining and enjoy it!" Sirius said, crashing his lips against Regulus's in a kiss that was completely one-sided. Regulus wasn't kissing him back. Sirius had to force his tongue into his brother's mouth. He could taste the salt from Regulus's tears on his tongue, and it only made Sirius more and more excited for what he was about to do.

Without so much as a warning, Sirius wrenched Regulus away from the wall and slammed him down onto the desk face-up. "Let it happen, Reg."

Regulus struggled to get up, but Sirius straddled him, holding him down in place. He reached for Regulus's shirt and ripped it open, the buttons popping off easily. Sirius ran his hands over Regulus's bare chest, taking in the beauty that was his younger brother.

Holding him down, Sirius moved down and unzipped Regulus's trousers. It was a difficult task, but eventually he managed to toss his brother's trousers to the floor. He had Regulus lying on a desk in the middle of a classroom that anyone could walk into, completely naked.

How bad he felt… but in a good way.

Sirius had taken Regulus's virginity, and after months and months of anticipation he knew he was supposed to feel happy about what he had done.

He knew he was supposed to be happy, and sure it had been simply amazing, but that look in Regulus's eyes after Sirius had finished with him was a look he would never be able to forget.

That look of pure hatred, and betrayal.

Sirius had never thought he could possibly see his brother look at him like that, and that fact that it was his fault entirely, broke Sirius's heart.

Sleeping with Regulus only taught Sirius one thing. Yes, he felt fulfilled but he also felt empty—he could add one more to his list, but he could scratch one person out of his life forever.

And it just hadn't been worth it. Oh how Sirius wished he could turn back time.

~The End~