Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me
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I don't know what to do anymore. It's too much. I don't know when it started, but I do know that I can't take it. The constant looks of disappointment. The disdain I see in everyone's eyes every time they look in my direction.
My parents didn't want me. I was such an embarrassment. An imperfection in their image.
Did no one think I could see the looks? Hear the jokes made at my expense? Did no one think I knew about the bets? I dare you to touch Her. That hurt. It hurt like Hell.
My boyfriend is cheating on me. Not that I couldn't see it coming. I mean everyone was right. He proved them right. Who would want to be with her?
I tried switching teams. It didn't work. They only wanted to use me. I got the same looks there that I have gotten everywhere else.
I can't take it, not anymore. I'm done trying. I'm going somewhere where no one will look at me with disdain, fear, disappointment.
I'm out of here. I'm going where I should have gone a long time ago.
They found her in the woods. They had been searching for weeks and ironically they find her in the woods on their way home. No one thought she would be so close. They cried when they found her. They cried even harder when they read the note.
They didn't realize it until she left. They didn't realize how much she meant to them until she left. Isn't that the way it always works? You don't know what you're missing until it's gone?
She was the glue. She held the group together. She diffused the tension in a room. She was willing to listen whenever someone needed her there. She did everything they asked and they took her for granted. Now they would never have the chance to make it up to her.
They watched as the funeral took place. They had lost the biggest asset to their team. They had lost a friend and someone who genuinely cared about everyone's personal opinions instead of just the group opinion they had to follow.
She showed them what it was liked to be cared about. She showed them that they were more than a pawn in the game and they never got to thank her. They never got a chance to show her how much it meant to them. They never were able to do something for her in return.
It wasn't right and they wished they could somehow make it right, but they knew that was all it was, a wish. It couldn't happen and they were sorry for that. They walked away after saying their last good byes from a distance.
They couldn't believe it when they heard. When they got that phone call, a revelation hit. They had lost her because of a lack of understanding. They were ignorant and they lost her.
When they got a letter in the mail that had been found in her room they cried. The letter stated how she was done trying to fit their expectations. She had found people who although didn't treat her great treated her better than they ever had. They were her family now.
They wanted to go to the funeral and make their apologies and last good byes, but they couldn't bring themselves to. It felt like they would be trespassing into a stranger's life and that was their fault. They couldn't blame anyone, but themselves. They were the ones who forced her away.