A/N This is my first QAF fanfic. I will do my best to stay true to the characters. All feedback is welcome. I hope that you enjoy this. I will try to add more to this soon.
Brian sat on his couch in his loft staring blankly into space. Six months, it had been six months since Justin had gone to New York. Time was not making Brian feel better; if anything he just missed Justin more each day. He couldn't bring himself to go and visit Justin because he knew that once he saw Justin he would never be able to leave him. Christ, what the fuck was he going to do?
For the past six months Brian had focused on work. Things at Kinetic were going really well and he was relieved to have the distraction. He missed being able to share his success with Justin. Justin…Everything was less vibrant and fulfilling without Justin.
I can't take it anymore Brian realized and picked up the phone. Justin answered on the first ring. It felt so good just to hear Justin's voice.
"Hi Brian" Justin said "How are you? We haven't talked for awhile is everything alright?"
"Yeah, everything is fine." Brian lied. "How is everything there?"
"Everything is great here" Justin lied right back.
The conversation continued on for another twenty minutes or so with both of them talking about how great their lives were going. They were both so busy trying to hide their loneliness that they failed to pick up on how unhappy the other one was.
Just before the boys hung up Justin mentioned that he had seen Mel the previous week. "She was in New York to take a deposition and she took me to lunch." Justin explained.
"Mel told me that she and Lindsay and Gus are moving back to Pittsburgh. You must be really excited that Gus is coming home." Justin said, somewhat wistfully.
"Gus is coming home? They haven't told me that they are moving back here." Brian replied, unable to keep the excitement out his voice at the idea that Gus was coming home.
"Fuck, sorry Brian. I hope that it wasn't supposed to be a surprise." Justin said.
"Don't worry Justin, this is the best news that I've heard in a long time. Thanks for telling me." Brian exclaimed. "I will give them a call to see if there is anything that I can do to help. You know that Lindz always seems to need something." Brian sighed.
"Well I'd better get going so that you can call them. I'm really glad that Gus is coming home. He is lucky to have you as his father." Justin said, hating to break the connection but worrying that Brian would figure out how depressed he was if he kept talking to Brian.
"Later." Brian said.
"Later." Justin hoped.
Brian immediately picked up the phone to call Lindz to see if what Justin had said was true. It would be great to have Gus home again. He really missed his son. Gus never failed to put a smile on Brian's face. He knew that having Gus around would help ease the pain of Justin's absence.
"Hi Lindz, do you have any news for me?" Brian asked hopefully.
"Hi Brian, I see that Justin has spilled the beans to you." Lindz replied. "I don't know why Mel told Justin in the first place, he never could keep a secret." She added angrily.
"Why was it a secret Lindz? I'm glad that he told me because now I can offer to help you and Mel if you need anything. Don't be mad a Justin, he didn't know that it was a secret. In fact, he was surprised that I didn't already know."
"I wanted to surprise you Brian. I knew that you would be thrilled to see me… and Gus of course." Lindz smiled into the phone.
"Of course I'm really happy that the three of you are moving back. Do you have a timetable for when you are planning to come back?" Brian inquired.
"Nothing is set in stone. I have contacted Sidney Bloom and he has promised me my old job when I return. Mel has contacted her old firm and it seems that they want her back as well. So, we just have to tie up some loose ends here and then figure out when we can move back." Lindz elaborated.
"Please let me know if there is anything that I can do to make your move easier. Please let me know when you are coming. I want to make sure that I am available to see Gus as soon as he gets here."
"Will do. Talk to you later Brian" Lindsay said as she was ready to get off the phone.
"Bye" Brian replied smiling to himself at the thought of his son returning home.
When Lindsay got off the phone she noticed that Mel was looking at her curiously..
"Why are you staring at me?" Lindz wanted to know.
"I'm just wondering why you didn't tell Brian that Justin is really unhappy in New York." Mel said.
"Why would I tell Brian that? He didn't ask about Justin and frankly I am a little annoyed that you mentioned that we were moving to Justin. He spoiled the surprise." Lindz complained.
"I didn't think that you were serious about trying to surprise Brain. I thought that you were kidding. Gus will tell Brian the minute he finds out we are moving back anyway and there is no way that we can keep it from Gus. He's a smart kid; he'll figure out that something is up when he sees all of the packing boxes etc." Melanie replied.
"I thought that you would tell Brian that Justin was upset when I saw him in New York because Brian loves Justin and from what I hear from Ted, Brian is just as upset about their separation. I think that we should try to get those two back together, don't you?" Mel asked.
"Why would we want to get those two back together? You know how hard it was to convince Justin to leave in the first place. I'm sure that he misses Brian, who wouldn't? I'm also sure that Brian has moved on. Brian never really loved Justin; he just liked having him around. You know that. I'm sure that Justin will find someone closer to his own age and he will forget about trying to get Brian back. Staying in New York is the best thing for Justin's career and if he has to suffer personally, well so what, his success will be worth it." Lindsay said with a ceratin finality.
Mel couldn't believe how cold Lindsay was. It made her wonder why Lindsay was so determined to keep Brian and Justin apart.
The next morning Mel decided to call Brian at work.
"Hi Mel, is everything okay with Gus?" Brian asked worriedly. Mel and he were not the best of friends and he was surprised to get her call.
"Gus is fine." Mel reassured Brian quickly.
"Thank God!" Brian exclaimed. "So why are you calling me?"
"Um…I know that this is none of my business but I am worried about Justin." Mel began.
Brian immediately tensed up. "What's wrong with Justin, Did something happen? Please tell me." Brian demanded.
"Well, I saw him in New York last week and Brian, I have to tell you that he is miserable." Mel continued.
"What do you mean miserable?" Brian asked needing clarification.
"He has lost weight and he just seemed desperately unhappy. I saw some of his latest paintings, which are amazing by the way, but they are all filled with a sense of longing for you. I don't really know shit about art but these pieces moved me to tears. I asked Justin if he was okay and he just shrugged and gave me a heartbreaking smile. I really think that he wants to come home to you but he doesn't feel like he can." Mel added. "I'm not trying to tell you that you have to rescue him I just thought that you would want to know." Mel finished lamely.
"Do you really think that he wants me to go get him and bring him home?" Brian asked quietly. "Why didn't Lindsay mention this to me when I called her yesterday?"
"I really think that Justin wants you to go and get him. Lindsay thinks that I am over reacting and that Justin needs to stay in New York for his career." Mel replied rolling her eyes.
"Thanks for letting me know Mel. I will think about what you said. I've got to go now." Brian said and hung up.
Brian immediately buzzed Cynthia "clear my schedule for the rest of the day. I have got to get out of here." He said it with such force that Cynthia didn't even bother to mention that it would be next to impossible to reschedule everything. She just sighed and got on the phone to clear her master's schedule.
Brian immediately drove home to the loft and sat on the couch and wondered what the hell he was supposed to do now. He desperately wanted to go to New York and bring his Sunshine home. There was nothing that he wanted more right now than to have Justin move back in with him, but what about Justin? Would it be fair to him? What if he needed to stay in New York to establish himself as an artist? Brian did not want to interfere with Justin's career. Oh God, what the fuck am I going to do?
Brian needed to get an objective opinion. He couldn't call Mikey because he was pretty sure that Mikey was glad that Justin was in New York and would not do anything to encourage Justin's return. Lindsay also wanted Justin to stay in New York so she would be absolutely no help with this decision either. Deb would just tell him to go get Justin, but she really wouldn't be able to think about what was in Justin's best interest. Deb missed her Sunshine and just wanted him to come home.
Brian picked up the phone and called the one person he knew would have Justin's best interest at heart, Jennifer, Justin's mom.
"Hello" Jennifer answered her phone.
"Hi, Jennifer, it's Brian" Brian answered somewhat formally. "I really need to talk to you and I was wondering if we could get together today. Are you free for lunch?
"Sure, Brian how does one o'clock sound?" Jennifer inquired.
"One o'clock sounds fine. Would you mind coming to the loft? I really would like to talk to you in private. It's about Justin." He added somewhat unnecessarily,
"Sure, I'll see you there at one." Jennifer replied wondering what Brian wanted to talk to her about. She knew that she wouldn't be able to concentrate on anything else until she met with Brian. Thank God it was only two hours away or she would drive herself absolutely crazy.
At one o'clock Jennifer promptly arrived at Brian's loft. It felt strange to come here when she knew that Justin wouldn't be there. She nervously pressed the button on the intercom to let Brian know that she was here.
Brian immediately buzzed Jennifer in. He was grateful that she had arrived on time. He was stressed enough about this meeting without the added burden of having to wait and worry until she arrived.
When Jennifer arrived she noted that Brian looked exhausted and wary of her. He motioned her to come and sit at the table. Brian had clearly gone to a lot of trouble to organize this lunch and she was touched at the effort he had made.
Brian had run out to Justin's favourite deli to pick up sandwiches, salads and a huge fruit plate. He wasn't sure what Jennifer liked so he wanted to have a variety of food for her. He reasoned that she would probably like at some of what Justin liked. Brian knew that he wouldn't be eating much of anything as his stomach was in knots.
"The food looks wonderful, Brian. You really didn't need to go to this much trouble for me." Jennifer said gently.
"It was no trouble I just wanted to make sure that you would have enough to eat." Brian said.
As Jennifer began to put some food on her plate, Brian went to the fridge to grab two bottles of mineral water. He opened one for himself and the other for Jennifer. Brian put a little bit of salad on his plate along with some fruit so that Jennifer wouldn't realize she was eating alone.
As soon as they were settled at the table Jennifer looked at Brian and said "so what's on your mind Brian?" She asked gently, she knew better than to push him too hard but she thought that he would feel better once he started talking, and frankly the suspense was killing her.
Brian sighed, and forced himself to speak. "I need your opinion about Justin. Do you think that he is happy in New York?"
"I think that he is growing in New York and I am sure that it is good for his art that he is in New York, but I know that he misses you terribly, so no I don't think that he is happy there. Why do you ask?"
"Mel saw him last week and she said that he was miserable. She thinks that he wants to come home, but doesn't know how. Lindsay thinks that he needs to stay in New York for the sake of his art. I want him to come home but I don't want to be selfish. That's why I needed to talk to you. I know that you will put Justin's needs first." Brian finished.
"Brian, I think that you need to talk to Justin. He will tell you what he wants, but you have to listen to him. You are going to have to be open with him and expect the same from him. I'm sorry that I can't decide for Justin and I don't think that you should either. Be sure of what you want and then go and ask him what he wants." Jennifer answered. "Above all let Justin decide what is best for him and don't push him away."
Brian smiled at Jennifer. He could tell from the gentleness of her tone that she knew how difficult it would be for Brian to do this, but he was relieved that she hadn't told Brian to leave Justin alone. He knew now that he would have to go to New York and see if maybe Justin would want to come home.