I haven't updated anything in forever! Trolololo.

This is a DNAngel fanfic my cousin and I wrote together some time ago and I thought: how nice it would be to see all you loverly people read our nonsense. We took turns writing here and there, no legitimate paragraphs for each of us. We might write some more later on but who knows. I would have edited it but that would take too much time and effort. (Lazzyyy)

My cousin's user name here on is purplemew12. If you're a fan of Pokemon, like both of us, go read her story "Diamond Dusk". I've never read it because I'm lazy and it seemed too long.

I swear we were both high on staying up late when we wrote this fanfic…

I don't own DNAngel, but it looks like I do when you read this.

"You better remember to be home no later than 27 seconds after 4:25 PM, and don't forget not to stalk Riku!" Daisuke mom called after him as he ran off (earlyly) to the train station.

Later that afternoon…

Stalk, stalk, stalk, stalk… Daisuke walked around near Riku, forgetting what his mommy said. "Er…Niwa…why are you following me?" Riku asked, then she looked up at the clock which was conveniently floating in midair beside her. "Oh, gotta get home, it's 28 seconds after 4:25 PM, bye." She ran off.

Daisuke looked at the conveniently-floating-in-midair clock and shrugged. "Eh, mom won't mind if I'm a little late." He took the train home and slowly walked to his house. He saw the floating clock again and saw it was 4:55 PM.

When he finally got home, he completely ignored all the training obstacles in the house and sort of drifted over them, not bothering to talk to his mom and floating upstairs to stare at a picture of Risa, who he was also stalking.

The next day…

Daisuke had a "cold" apparently….Later, Satoshi stopped by and blabbed on about being careful about something. Then he walked closer to Daisuke until there faces were almost touching when suddenly- Riku walked in!

"Um…Did I come at a bad time?" she asked. "Yes…I was about to kiss Satoshi…But, you ruined it, D- YOU!" Daisuke shouted.

Riku's eye widened and she backed out of the room. Just before she left she muttered something along the lines of "D- you too Niwa…"

Satoshi backed away from Daisuke and quickly ran out the door… "Why does everyone hate me? Just 'cause I'm a perv doesn't mean people have to reject me…."

"I am not a perv!" someone shouted from Daisuke's room in a voice that sounded more like a phantom thief's voice than Daisuke's… "Shut up HAL," Daisuke said, in his own voice this time. Satoshi quickly fled the scene.

Later that night…

"I don't WANNA steal a painting!" Daisuke whined, "I wanna play the Wii some more…and stalk people." "You are going to steal that painting mister or you're grounded," his mother hissed. "Do the right thing son," his Grandpa nagged, "Set a good example for small children by stealing that painting as Light." "It's Dark Gramps," Daisuke muttered, rolling his eyes.

Soon Daisuke found himself attempting to steal a painting (as Light…erm…Dark)…of (Satoshi dressed as) a fairy princess…which was said to posses magical powers. Yippee.

Daisuke looked at the painting. "Wow…Satoshi's hot in a dress…." He said. Light…I mean…Dark, was "kinda" disturbed. "That's a guy ya know…" "Yeah I know," Daisuke replied, seemingly talking to himself, "He's still hot…especially with those nerdy glasses…"

Light, I mean (again) , Dark, was very disturbed by now. "Would you shut up and steal the painting already?" "Alright alright, stop nagging me woman!" Daisuke shouted, attempting to take the painting off the wall, and setting off an alarm.

The next day…

"You were supposed to frickin' steal the painting, not make me pay a hundred bucks to bail you out of jail!" Satoshi yelled, "Do you think I want THAT shown to the public?" "ER…it already was," Daisuke muttered. "WTF!" Satoshi shouted at the top of his lungs. "Shh…You'll wake my mom…She doesn't know you spent the night after bailing me out of jail…" Daisuke said quietly.

Meanwhile, Krad and Dark (Light) were having their OWN discussion…

"I bethca fifty bucks they're gonna kiss," Krad said, watching Satoshi's and Daisuke's 'discussion'. "Well, I betcha 100 bucks their gonna kiss! Beat THAT!" Dark yelled. "Fine…Show me the money." Krad said. "Uh…About the money…Well, I stole some last night, but the police ratted me out. I swear those old farts are gonna pay…." Dark grumbled.

"So…" Daisuke said, trying to think of something to say. "If you kiss me I swear I'll snap your neck, I may not look like it with these glasses on, but I have a black belt in karate," Satoshi said. "That puts a downer on things…" Daisuke mumbled. "Did you SAY something?" Satoshi asked. "Um…No?" Daisuke replied. He sat there awkwardly….

"Daisuke, I made breakfast and, WHAT THE F-?" His mom shouted as she walked into the room. "Mom, it's not what it looks like!" Daisuke yelled. "Or is it?" Satoshi added, smirking at Daisuke. "Not now, Satoshi!" Daisuke yelled. His mom ran to the phone and called the police to hold them as prisoners in jail. "…And don't let them out until they're 22-years-old!" Daisuke's mom shouted into the phone.

"I'm sorry ma'am, we can't arrest this stranger and your daughter for kissing," the policeman said, "Daisukia will just have to be grounded…or something…" And the line went dead.

"Well that went well…" Krad said. "Yes, yes it did…" Dark replied. "So, no one owes anyone anything?" Krad asked. "Nope," Dark said. "Good…I don't have fifty bucks," Krad muttered. "What was that?" Dark asked suspiciously. "Nothing…"

"So, would you like some pancakes?" Daisuke's mom asked, acting as if nothing had happened. "Er…sure?" Satoshi said. Daisuke didn't reply and merely petted Wilf…er…With.

"Kyuu!" With said.

Dark sighed, "Don't we all buddy…don't we all…" "Don't we all what?" Krad asked. "You won't know until you learn the language of the rabbits…" Dark said, smiling insanely. "Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaay…" Krad muttered.

Will…grr…WITH hopped out of Daisuke's arms and randomly attacked Satoshi. "THAT'S FOR STEALING MY GIRLFRIEND!" he shouted at the top of his tiny bunny lungs.

Satoshi screamed like a little girl and started running all over Daisuke's bedroom. "Eeek! Get it off me!" he yelled.

Daisuke's mom hit With over the head with a badly charred pancake. "I never said I was GOOD at cooking," she muttered. With stirred a bit and Daisuke hit both him and Satoshi with the stalker-y painting he had of Risa. Then of course, after seeing the painting, he turned into Light…er….Dark…

All of a sudden, Riku and Risa showed up in Daisuke's bedroom. "Ow!" the charred pancake somehow hit Risa in the face. "It BURNS!" she yelled. Riku sighed and walked over to With and petted him for attacking Satoshi. Then she slapped Satoshi. "THAT'S FOR STEALING DAISUKE!"

"WHY ME? I DON'T LIKE DAISUKE OR RABBITS! I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE THIS!" Satoshi shouted, about to run out of the room, but running into Daisuke's mom and 'accidentally' kissing her.

"Satoshi! How could you? You don't like me, and you're hitting on my mom….but that's not the point, WHY DO YOU HATE ME?" Daisuke yelled at Satoshi, after spontaneously turning back into himself. "Whatever we had, is OVER!"

"Whatever we had? I'm not- ARGH!" Satoshi seemed on the verge of a psychotic break. "Whoa, just calm down Satoshi-Chan," Riku said. "I actually rather enjoyed kissing you if it matters," Daisuke's mom said. "MOM!" Daisuke yelled, "NOT YOU TOO! Although I must admit, he does look hot in those nerdy glasses…especially with a fairy dress on" – "SHUT UP!" Satoshi interrupted. "And…Satoshi-CHAN? I'm a F-ing GUY!" he shouted. "Or are you?" Riku asked with a smirk on her face.

"Betcha fifty bucks he's not a boy," Krad said. "Not this again…but…I'll take that bet," Dark said, "But how could you not know if he was a girl…you frickin pretty much live inside him! That's just f-ing messed up! Which also means…you could possibly be a girl too (they are opposites. lol)!" I bet Krad would be hot if he/she was a girl…Dark thought.

"Stop thinking like that!" Daisuke said. "You know I can hear what you're thinking!" "Daisuke, why are you yelling at yourself?" Risa asked, after finally waking up with severe burns on her face from the pancake.

"Oh, Dark was just thinking—" "SHUT UP! DON'T TELL THEM THAT!" Just keep this between you and me, got it, Daisuke? Dark asked through his mind. Fine…Daisuke answered.

"Oh…I'm sure he likes Satoshi too…" Risa said, before realizing what she had said and slapping Satoshi. "I like Mr. Dark, don't make him like you!"

"What? Do you have something against my nerdy glasses?" Satoshi asked Risa. "I sure don't," Daisuke's grandpa said, walking upstairs, "I think they make you look dreamy."

"HEY! Back off, gramps!" Daisuke and Risa yelled simultaneously. "Yeah, everyone knows Daisuke likes Satoshi," With added, again speaking English, despite DNAngel being a Japanese anime, and him being a rabbit.

Riku stared awkwardly at the scene and was "kinda" surprised Risa liked Satoshi. Then she joined Dark's and Krad's conversation.

"'Ello," she said, speaking in a british accent for no apparent reason because I needed to take up space.

"By the way, I sent a warning letter saying you were going to steal the Mona Lisa at two in the morning tomorrow," Daisuke's mom said, "have a good day honey." She quickly kissed Satoshi and ran downstairs. "OH COME ON!" Satoshi yelled, "I am out of here!" And With attacked him again, causing him to scream again, Risa was hit by another rouge pancake, and Riku fell off the balcony (or was pushed by Daisuke) while a song by Lady Gaga played.

Satoshi got With off him and turned the Lady Gaga music up and started to dance. "Papa, papa, paparazzi!" he sang. "What a shocker….he's bad at singing…and I thought he was good at it…" Daisuke said, disappointed. "Yeah, and you thought I was good at cooking," Risa said, recovering from the pancake accident.

"Wanna go destroy small towns?" Dark asked Krad suddenly. "I thought you were supposed to be the good guy," Krad said. Dark shrugged. "It got boring." "Alright then, let's go, see ya later guys!" they said, gaining the ability to temporarily leave Satoshi and Daisuke.

As soon as they were gone Daisuke's grandfather suddenly remembered that he had sent a warning letter saying that Daisuke was going to steal 'The Scream' in five minutes. They decided to go to a romantic movie instead.

Later…

Riku fell off the balcony and landed on Daisuke's trampoline and bounced back up. When she got into Daisuke's room, she saw his grandfather making out with Satoshi's fairy princess picture. She left the room while saying, "I'll leave you two alone."

On the stairs…

"I'm going to be emotionally scarred for life," Riku said, unable to get the previous few minutes out of her mind. "Well, at least I got these pictures for blackmail." She chuckled evily. "Just gotta go get this film developed…"

What REALLY happened at the movies…

"Daisuke, you ate ALL our popcorn and the movie hasn't even started! As punishment, go sit by nerd-boy over there," Risa said, pointing to Satoshi. She was currently upset at him for kissing Daisuke's mom…twice.

"FINE!" Daisuke growled, doing as he was told. Then Satoshi's glasses randomly fell to the floor, Satoshi reached down to pick them up, Daisuke was walking out of the row of chairs to get some more popcorn and somehow tripped over Satoshi and they tumbled down the stairs, landing in a heap at the bottom, randomly 'accidentally' kissing.

There was a sickening cracking sound and they missed the movie because they had to take Daisuke to the hospital for a very-nearly-broken neck. "Warned him…" Satoshi said.

"Ugh….." Daisuke moaned while unconscious. "Gonna get you….Satoshi…." he almost smacked Satoshi in the face by rapidly moving his hands in the air.

Satoshi grumbled something about actually snapping his neck before security dragged him away.

Dark and Krad finally came back, but had a fairly hard time finding their way back to Satoshi and Daisuke, seeing as they MAY have made a bet about who could drink more of a rather suspicious looking liquid that probably wasn't meant for human-like creature consumption.

"What now?" Dark asked. They had been wandering around inside a painting for about an hour or so, but hadn't noticed quite yet that every meadow looked EXACTLY the same. "Well, we could try going over to that meadow over there." Krad said, pointing to the same meadow they just went through. "Okay," Dark said, shrugging.

BACK TO DAISUKE!

"He was a good friend," Risa said, sobbing as she stared at an open coffin. "We'll miss you…grandpa," Daisuke said, his neck having recovered. "Miss me, why?" his grandpa asked walking over to him. "Wait…but aren't you dead?" Daisuke asked. "No, I was too busy kissing a painting to die."

"Then who's that?" Daisuke asked. "Oh, that's just my clone," his grandpa said calmly, walking away. He called back to Daisuke something about those darn clones never lasting long anyway.

Meanwhile….

"Why do we keep ending in meadows?" Krad asked Dark. "Aren't we supposed to have wings or something?" he added. Dark shrugged (yet again) and just kept going around in circles in the meadow painting. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a Satoshi wearing a fairy princess outfit, was with Dark and Krad. "What the….?" Krad asked. "It's just Satoshi in a fairy princess dress…."

Dark muttered. "It's not like I would be used to seeing men in dresses…" Krad mumbled. He really is a perv…he thought.

"How do we get out of this d- painting?" Dark yelled at the fairy princess Satoshi. "Go to Candy Mountain Charlie!" The fairy Satoshi said, randomly skipping off through the exact same meadow they were already in.

"Wow…I think all these meadows are exactly the same," Krad said suddenly, "I think we're stuck in a painting…" "That's just stupid, I can't stand being around idiots like you! I AM SO BREAKING UP WITH YOU!" Dark screamed before running off. Krad just stood there, and randomly started crying.

Back to Daisuke and Risa

"We should probably go tell the security guys to let Satoshi go, huh?" Risa said absentmindedly to Daisuke. "Nah, he almost broke my neck, let 'im rot in jail."

Meanwhile…

"So…when are you going to let me out?" Satoshi said to the security guard who currently had a tight hold on his arm. The guy didn't talk, and it was clear he had no intention of letting Satoshi go.

"Meh…can't get in any more trouble then I'm already in," Satoshi muttered, kicking the guy in the shins and sprinting away. Before he knew it he was running from the entire British police force, the army, and the Navy.

Daisuke stared ahead as he ate popcorn and watched Satoshi get chased by the British police force, the army, and the Navy. "I'll get you Daisuke! If it's the last thing I'll doooooooo!" Satoshi yelled while skipping off into the sunset while the British police force, the army, and the Navy followed, in slow motion.

"Mmm…good popcorn," Daisuke said, completely ignoring Satoshi's threat. "Oh look, they've almost caught him," Risa said, sitting next to Daisuke and holding his hand. Daisuke scooted away from Risa. "What are you doing…?" he asked suspiciously. Risa just stared at him…. "Nothing….." she said, scooting closer to him and holding his hand tightly so he couldn't get away.

Suddenly Daisuke's grandpa burst into the room. "Ah….young love." "GRANDPA!" Daisuke screamed, blushing furiously. "SHH! You're disturbing the part where Satoshi falls in love with his capture!" some random person yelled as they watched Satoshi "fall in love" with one of the British guards. "Now THAT'S young love…" Daisuke's grandpa said, sighing.

"Okaaaaaaaaaay," Daisuke said, breaking free of Risa's grip and fleeing as fast as he could. "Soooo…" Daisuke's grandpa said, sitting down next to Risa. Risa promptly got some pepper spray out of her purse which she suddenly decided to carry. "Leave me alone you old fart!" She exclaimed, spraying him with the pepper spray and following Daisuke saying, "COME BACK MY LOVE!"

Daisuke ran away from Risa and saw that Dark and Krad were in a painting with a fairy princess Satoshi and them drinking a rather suspicious looking liquid that probably wasn't meant for human-like creature consumption.

He tapped the painting, and the two suddenly flew into the air, landing with a loud THUMP on a huge boulder lying in the meadow. "This could be fun," he said, chuckling in an evil sort of way. He got a paintbrush and some paints out of nowhere and was going to paint Dark and Krad a 'puppy'. However, apparently the only thing he could paint correctly was a stalker-ish picture of Risa, and it ended up looking like a small t-rex. That's why Dark and Krad ended up fleeing for their lives.

Meanwhile…

Daisuke's grandpa was sitting next to Satoshi by the sunset, after he finally escaped from the angry mob of people. "I have to tell you a secret…" Satoshi said. "What is it…?" Daisuke's grandpa asked. "I've been cheating on you." Satoshi said… "…" Daisuke's grandpa was silent. "WHAT IN THE H-!" he screamed, storming off in the direction of Risa. Satoshi sighed.

Risa was sitting by the ocean and sighed. "Well hello there." Daisuke's grandpa said, acting all "smooth". "GET AWAY FROM ME YOU OLD FART!" Risa screamed, whacking him with her purse. "Ow…She's so cool!" Daisuke's grandpa sighed as he watched Risa walk off, flipping her hair.

"Creepy old perv," Risa muttered, storming away from the disturbed old man. "Like he's hot enough to handle this." She struck a really hooker-y looking pose and skipped off into the sunset. Daisuke's grandpa just sighed and shook his head sadly.

Daisuke's house…

"I need to get this posted on you tube somehow…" Riku muttered, after hacking into Daisuke's computer. She clicked around more on the computer and finally got working. It took 5 hours to download, seeing as it was such a FREAKING slow computer…erm… *cough cough* Anyways….Riku fell asleep and then woke up when the computer said, "Download success". "YES!" Riku laughed evile-y….ish…..She randomly went into the painting and randomly teleported everyone out, including Dark, Krad, and Daisuke.

But somehow, Riku's plan of teleportation failed and she too was stuck inside the ridiculous painting.

"Ya know?" Dark said. "Your name sounds like a sentence like, 'Oh no, I stepped in some Krad'." Dark wondered more about the strange things that sound weird… "With!" he finally shouted, randomly. With emerged from under Daisuke's bed covers and yawned. Then the long-eared bunny started to hop around the room, tending to crash into the wall or something else…

"With! Get your butt over here. Now!" Dark shouted impatiently. With sighed in annoyance and somehow floated over into the painting which Dark was still in.

"Oh great, now we're all trapped in here…hey…want some suspicious liquid? It's only not meant for human-like creature consumption…you're not human-like…" Krad said.

"NO! MY BUNNY!" Dark shouted, hugging With. With gasped for breath and thought, You're pits stink, Dark… Krad read With's mind. "It's from the suspicious liquid…" he said.

"And you don't smell too great either…" Dark muttered…darkly… "You wanna bet, Dark Mousy?" Krad started up an argument. As the two continued to argue over who's pits smelled worse, Riku and Daisuke shrugged.

"Oh get a room already!" Riku and Daisuke shouted at the same time. Dark and Krad looked at them, then at each other and sort of kind of blushed while they got angrier. "Stop making fun of us!" they said. "Hey! Stop copying me! No, you're copying ME!" they said together.

"Aw, how sweet…" Satoshi said, appearing out of nowhere in particular. "SATOSHI!" Daisuke ran up and hugged him. "Where have you been? I missed you so much!" he said, clinging. "GET THE H*** OFF ME!" Satoshi yelled.

"Angry much…" Riku said, backing away cautiously.

If you have any suggestions for more misadventures of crack DNAngel fanfics, just gimme a PM and I'll consider.

Have a nice life!

Adieu~