Title: What Am I?
Author: GEM
Date written: 1/31/06
Rated: T
Word count: 2023
Story Timeline: Post Epiphanies
Category: Drama
Warnings: Tissues may be needed
Characters: Roslin/Adama
Summary: Laura is unsettled after learning more about how she was given her second chance at life.
Spoiler: Season 1 Episode 8 (Flesh and Bone) Season 2 Episode 212 (Epiphanies)
Author's Note: This came to me this morning and begged to be written. It came out of a post I read on a message board (several actually) That claimed Laura had to be a cylon now because of the cure. I think not! Read on and see why. Feedback is always appreciated. I hope you enjoy it.
She walked down the corridor aimlessly. Everything seemed out of focus and in a fog. She didn't know why she was here or what she was doing. When she turned the corner she saw his face. She turned away and ran for her life. The corridors all looked the same they were endless and he was catching her. She had to get away, quickly. She had to find help but there was no one to help her. She turned the corner and ran right into him. This man she knew was a cylon. She had sent him to his death. She fought to get away but his hold on her was too strong. She finally succumbed to his will. He backed her up against the wall and whispered in her ear.
"Laura you are a cylon."
Her eyes were wide and she was about to scream but Leoben Conroy was gone. He vanished into tin air.
---
The Presidential Security detail was strategically placed outside the guest quarters on the Battlestar Galactica. The President was remaining on board for medical observation for the next few days. The detail liked these kinds of assignments. They were peaceful not many people on board a military ship would want to harm the President. On the contrary they had more help when they were aboard Galactica both from the Marines and the Air Wing. When Mathis heard the scream he and his partner sprung into action. They burst through the door with weapons drawn. Nicole Dailey approached the President. She was sitting upright on her bed, the covers around her were thrown away haphazardly and she was sweating and breathing heavily as if she was running. Billy her personal aide was also awakened by her scream and now sitting by her side.
"Madame President?" Billy came to sit beside her. The young man looked concerned, as were the agents in the room.
Laura regained her composure and finally spoke. "I'm fine Billy. " She turned to her agents, who were searching the room and addressed them. "I 'm sorry to have to bring you in here like that. Really I'm fine. I think it was a dream."
. "That's are job, Ma'am. There is no need to apologize." Nicole said as Mathis finished the search. "Can we get you anything Ma'am?"
"No thank you." Laura answered. Billy knew that if she needed anything he would ask him so he stayed back as the agents left the room and retook their posts.
"Madame President Do you need anything?" Laura picked up the water glass next to her bed as he spoke and took a sip. Billy noticed her hands were still shaking.
Laura smiled at her young aide. "What time is it Billy?"
"0100, Ma'am."
Laura thought for a moment. She needed to talk to him but was it fair to wake him at this hour. She finally came to the conclusion that she wouldn't sleep until she did. "Billy, I need a favor. I need to see the Admiral."
"Yes, Ma'am. I'll make the call."
"No, Billy I'll make the call. Go get dressed." Billy gave her a confused look. "I need to go see him. It can't be here. I need to get out of here."
"Yes, Ma'am." Billy helped her out of bed and to the chair next to phone before leaving to get dressed.
Laura picked up the phone but hesitated for moment before dialing the number.
---
Buzzing, buzzing what is…. Bill came fully awake and realized what it was. He reached for the headset. "Adama." He answered in a groggy voice.
"Bill…"
The voice on the other end was shaky but he knew it was Laura. She sounded flustered.
"Laura is everything alright?" He voice was soft and soothing but strong.
"I know it's late." She paused for a moment. Adama was about to say something when she continued. "I need to see you."
He was sitting up in his rack when she said that and was now standing. "I'll be right there."
"No, Bill. I'm coming to you. I'll explain when I get there."
"Alright Laura."
-----
Bill Adama had known the President for months and he had only heard that tone in her voice twice. Once when she was contemplating the assassination of Admiral Cain. He also remembered that tone vividly during those first five days after the attacks when they were running from the cylons every thirty-three minutes.
He stood in the entryway of his quarters, dressed in his uniform waiting and pacing nervously. She never called this time of night. Something must have happened. What? He didn't know. He thoughts were interrupted by a knock on his hatch. When he opened it he came face to face with Laura Roslin. She was sitting in her wheelchair in her black pants suit and lilac top. To the causal observer she looked as poised as any other politician. Bill Adama knew better he looked at her and saw a face stricken with fear. "Madame President." Bill acknowledged her as he helped Billy maneuver the wheelchair inside.
"Thank you for seeing me, Admiral." Laura gave him a faint smile. She then looked up at Billy and asked him to leave them alone. Once Billy had left, Laura turned back to Bill. "I'm sorry to wake you, Bill."
"It's no problem, Laura." Bill noted her appearance she looked uncomfortable and unsure of herself
She chose her words carefully. "I came her because I know I can trust you to tell me the truth. Since Kobol we have become closer then ever before I know we care for each other." Laura thought about bringing up the kiss but given the situation thought better of it. That was conversation for another time.
Laura was babbling she never did that. She was nervous about something. In all the time her had known her he had never seen her nervous. He knelt down next to her and placed a hand over hers. She jumped pulling her had away. "Easy, Laura."
"Bill I'm loosing my mind." She leaned back in the chair and looked as if she was going to cry.
Bill did the only thing he could think of. He stood up and put one arm around her back and the other under her knees. Laura gave him a look similar to the one before he kissed her a couple of weeks ago. "Trust me." Bill smiled at her and lifted her out of the chair. She did and she felt safe for the first time since that horrible dream. She put her arms around his neck and smiled. He carried her over and set her down on the sofa. She smiled at him; it felt nice to be out of the chair. He smiled back and went to let go but she pulled him down. He got the clue and sat next to her. He readjusted his hold and pulled her close. "Is that better?"
Laura laid her head against his shoulder "Much."
"Tell me what's wrong." The request was made in the softest of tones.
Laura looked up at him. "You'll think I'm crazy. I think I'm crazy."
Bill put a hand under her chin and lifted it gently until their eyes met. "No I won't and you're not crazy."
"When I was on the Chamalla I used to have visions. One of them was of the cylon you know as Leoben Conroy. I had a vision that he was chasing me through a forest and then he caught me and put his hand on my month whispered something in my ear and blew away from him. I know this sounds weird but after that…
"After your vision we found him on the Geminon Traveler " Bill finished.
"Yes."
"What's got you so upset it was vision. That part of your live is over. You're not taking that stuff anymore."
"No, I'm not. Earlier tonight I had a dream. I was on Galactica and I was running down the corridors, The Corridors were all out of focus almost foggy. It didn't seem real, of course it wasn't, it was a dream. I kept running I felt like someone was following me. When. I turned the corner he attacked me.
"Who?" Bill asked calmly. He could tell it was hard for her to retell this ordeal even though it was a dream.
"Leoben." Laura answer was barely a whisper.
Bill instinctive held her tighter and she felt safe. It gave her the strength to continue. "He pushed me up against the wall, covered my mouth so I couldn't scream, and whispered into my ear." Laura stopped trying desperately to regain her composure.
Bill could tell she was holding her tears inside. This woman that was so strong was now overcome with fear. It was eating at her from the inside out. "It's okay Laura. You're safe now he isn't going to hurt you. It's okay to let it out I won't think any less of you."
Laura buried her face in his neck and Bill felt hot silent tears run down his skin. "Oh, Laura what did he say to you?" He rubbed small circles of comfort on her back as the tears fell
Through her tears he could feel her breath against his skin. She was saying something but he couldn't make it out. He took her head and gently lifted it up so that they were once again looking eye and eye. "What did you say?"
"He said I was a cylon." She was shaking now and Bill did all he could to keep her calm. "It was a dream Laura you are not a cylon. You're safe no one is going to hurt you. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere.
----
Laura must have fallen asleep because when she woke up She was lying on Bill sofa safely tucked in his embrace. "You're awake." A familiar husky voice said.
"Mmmmhmm. What time is it? "
"0400."
Laura turned and faced him and smiled. "Well, this is going to hard to explain."
"No one needs to know." Bill smiled back. "Laura, we need to finish our talk."
"I know." Laura shifted in the embrace Bill let go and she sat up.
Bill sat and looked at her. "You are not a cylon."
"How can you be so sure that there isn't a small possibility? Baltar saved me using cylon blood!" Laura was beside herself again.
Bill took her hands "Look at me, Laura. You are not a cylon. Cylons are machines. They don't know what we know or feel what we feel. They don't what it's like to be happy, sad, or feel fear. They have no idea how to trust or love…" His last word was barely a whisper "The cylons may be able to emulate our emotions but they will never truly understand them. They think emotion make us weak that they blindside us but they are wrong. Emotions are what make us human. You know what these emotions feel like Laura. You know what it's like to love…"
She let go of his hands and moved closer to him she looked deep in his eyes. She saw his desire and she knew he saw hers. She didn't miss his earlier statement even if he thinks she did hear him. She heard him. Laura leaned closer to him she closed her eyes as she let her lips touch his. They were warm and inviting and it didn't take long for him to respond. She felt him tighten the embrace and deepen the kiss. The kiss seemed to last forever but it wasn't long enough. When they finally broke apart. Laura was breathless. "You're right Bill. I know what it's like to love."
Bill smiled back at her and this time his lips met hers. This kiss was different from the one he had given her on Colonial one those weeks ago. It didn't speak of thanks, comfort, or loss. This one spoke of love, trust and passion. It too didn't last long enough and they both were breathless at the end. "You are most certainly not a cylon."