I found this gem I wrote back in 2007 during my mourning Alan Quartermaine time. It still makes me laugh every time I read it and I hope it does the same for everyone else. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: I do not own the GH populace, but merely borrow from time to time for my personal enjoyment.
Monica was opening her office door when she was startled by a set of arms encompassing her. Sensing Alan's presence, she enveloped herself in their warmth by leaning closer while she was led into her office. He then shut the door, turned her around, and their lips came together in a time stopping kiss. After a few moments, each came up for air.
"My, my, what did I do to deserve that greeting, Dr. Quartermaine?"
Alan lit up with a Cheshire grin. "I missed my brilliant, sexy, voluptuous wife. I haven't gotten a chance to be with you today, my love"
Monica laughed. "Alan, we had lunch together in the cafeteria, remember?"
Alan turned and locked the door. Monica greeted that action with a sheepish smile. He took her back in his arms and led her slowly to her couch. He sat down and pulled her onto his lap.
"It is true, Monica, that I got to see you at lunch" Alan began to unbutton his wife's blouse. "But I haven't had an opportunity to really see you since last night." He began to nibble on his wife's neck as Monica began to remove his tie.
"Oh, we can't have that, now can we?" Monica breathlessly replied as Alan leaned her back against the couch.
A while later, Alan and Monica were lying on the couch together. He is stroking her hair and she is lazily moving her finger across his chest. Both are enjoying the quiet escape from the chaos of the hospital. Alan finally broke the silence. "So, what is the plan tonight?"
Monica smiled. "It's a surprise, Birthday Boy. Don't worry. You'll enjoy yourself."
Alan began to move his hand lazily down her back. "So what did you get me?"
"Alan Quartermaine, no matter how many ways you try, you are not going to seduce my plans for you tonight or your present out of me." Monica pauses. "You just have to wait."
Before he could retort, his pager went off. He picked it up off of his pants on the floor. "Damn. I have to go, Monica."
Both made themselves presentable. When Alan got to the door, he looked out to make sure no one was looking. He then grabbed his wife and kissed her. "Until tonight." Alan said before walking away with a smile on his face.
Monica watched him walk away with an equally large grin on her face. "Alan Quartermaine, my surprise is going to knock your socks off"
TWO HOURS LATER
Alan was walking down the halls when he saw Bobbie and Monica laughing in the waiting room. He overheard snippets of their conversation.
"Did Alberto meet up with you yet?" Bobbie asked
"A few minutes ago at my office. I had to make sure he was out of sight of Amy and Alan. It was perfect. He's going to bring what I wore with him to the suite tonight before I see Alan"
"Does Alan suspect anything?"
"Nope, not a thing"
"Monica, you're so bad…."
Monica laughed "I know. Maybe you can use Alberto sometime."
"If he is as good as you say he is I just might!" Bobbie retorted. She walked with Monica giggling and whispering like teenagers. Alan's face becomes red with rage.
"On my birthday, Monica. I can't believe you would stoop so low."
4 PM
Alan is sitting in his office when he heard a knock on the door. "Come in" he announced absently. A messenger walked in with a single rose and a note. Alan tipped the delivery man and opened the card. It said:
Happy Birthday to the sexiest man I've ever known.
Let me show you how much I appreciate you tonight.
Meet me at the Quartermaine Suite at 8 pm for a birthday to remember.
Love, Monica
"8 pm, huh? Let's see how surprised you are when I show up at 7 pm and catch you with Alberto" saying Alberto in a sarcastic high pitched voice
7:30 pm
Alan quickly walked to the Nurses station, running late from a phone call he got. "Amy, have you seen my wife?"
"No, she left a little while ago. She said she wanted to get things ready for your birthday surprise."
"Oh, she did, did she? Thanks, Amy" Alan walked to the elevators. When the doors opened, he got in barely holding his temper in check. "I'm going to catch you, Monica."
At the Quartermaine suite, Monica had just finished placing Alan's gift on the bed and prepared to order room service. After placing the order, she got a phone call. "Hello….hi, Alberto….you're running late? How late?….Oh, okay. Good. Alan is supposed to be here at 8 pm.…thanks."
7:50 pm
Alan obtained the spare key from the front desk and walked to the elevator, attempting to keep his jealousy in check. He pushed the floor needed and clenched his fists tightly.
When Alan got off the elevator a few minutes later, he saw a young Italian man walking out the door of the Quartermaine suite talking to Monica. He overheard their conversation.
"Bella, he will love it."
"Alberto thanks again for everything. You have no idea how hard this was keeping this under wraps from my husband."
"Well, give your husband my high regards for being married to such a beautiful woman." Alberto took her hand and kissed it.
Alan saw this and exploded as he stormed over to the suite. Before Alberto could act, he grabbed him and slammed him up against the wall. "GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY WIFE YOU CHEAP ITALIAN ROMEO!" He then threw him across the hall onto the floor in a heap.
Monica, inside the suite holding a box, dropped it and ran over to the men. "Alan, let him go!" Somehow, she managed to get Alan off of Alberto. "Alan Quartermaine, what is the matter with you?!"
"God Monica! I'm not enough for you again, I see. You couldn't get someone your own age. I thought you had better taste!"
Monica realized what Alan was thinking and was furious. "Alan Quartermaine, you are an idiotic jackass!" She turned to Alberto. "I'm sorry, Alberto. Are you all right?"
Alberto, scared of the man in front of him, ran off towards the elevator. "I am good, Dr. Quartermaine" As he got to the elevator, he thought again and ran through the door to the stairs.
Monica turned to her husband furious. "Alan Quartermaine, what has gotten into you? Why are you here? It's not 8 pm yet. You couldn't wait 10 minutes!" She stormed back into the suite.
Alan turned with fury in his eyes as he followed her inside and slammed the door. "I wanted to catch you in the act with your lover but I see that I got here too late. You're with me today, then a tryst with him. Were you planning on being with me again after him, Monica? God, you're such a tramp!"
He turned towards the door to where Monica's box dropped. A low cut V-necked cherry red chemise with slits up the side and spaghetti straps fell out of the box along with a matching robe. He walked over and picked it up. In spite of himself, he pictured Monica wearing it and could feel himself getting stirred. Mad at himself, he turned to Monica.
"My, my, Monica, a lover that brought you silk lingerie. Probably more than Rick Webber ever gave you."
Monica reached her breaking point. "You jealous idiot! I am not having an affair with Alberto. You want to know what I was doing with him?" She walked over to where she had Alan's gift on the bed. She picked it up quickly and threw it at him. Alan barely caught it and held the lingerie at the same time.
"Here! Happy birthday you overgrown, pompous jackass!" Monica screamed before she stormed into the spare bedroom and slammed the door.
Alan was still angry, but curiosity got the best of him as he carried the box and lingerie to a nearby table. He put the chemise down and slowly opened the box top. When he saw what was inside, he was stunned.
Inside was a professional "boudoir" photo of Monica modeling the red chemise, which went to mid thigh. The chemise gave justice to her cleavage and her legs. Her hair and makeup were flawless. Alan saw how beautiful she was and melted. In the corner was a photographer's signature. Alberto. Suddenly, he got a sick feeling in his stomach and guilt washed over him. At that moment, there was a knock at the door and he heard "Room Service"
Alan walked to the door and opened it. The waiter wheeled in an ice bucket with non-alcoholic champagne and a silver bowl. He signed for the delivery, tipped the waiter, and showed him out. Alan walked back over to the bowl and lifted the cover. He saw plump strawberries in them. Realization kicked in as he slapped his head with his hand. "Alan Quartermaine, you are such a stupid ass!"
A voice came from the spare bedroom. "Yes you are!"
With his tail between his legs, Alan walked over to the door of the spare bedroom. When he tried to turn the knob, it was locked. Taking a deep breath, he knocked on the door. "Monica, will you open the door? I'm sorry."
"No. You're an idiot!"
"Monica, please?"
"No. You thought I was having an affair….again…then you use Rick Webber as a cheap shot. It was over thirty years ago!"
Alan knew he had his work cut out for him. "Monica, please. I'm sorry. I overheard you and Bobbie at the hospital talking about Alberto, then I saw him kissing you, I lost it. I can't help it. When I see you with another man, my insides burn. I can't stand another man noticing my good luck. You are the sexiest, most desirable woman in the world, even after all this time. Every time I see you, I just want to rip your clothes off and make passionate love to you. I love you more than I love my own life."
Inside the spare room, Monica was trying to hold onto her anger, but was losing it in spite of herself. "Alan, we are not young anymore. You're 63 today. I'm 57. Men are not chasing after me like you think they are. Some things on me have not held up against time, you know."
Outside the door, Alan smiled slightly. He knew Monica was slowly forgiving him. "Lady when I'm 83 and you're 77, men are still going to find you desirable and I'm still going to get jealous and want to rip your clothes off. I can't help it. I love you. If I lost you, I wouldn't be able to go on."
Monica exhaled, then unlocked the door and opened it. "Damn it, why can't I stay mad at you?"
"Because every time I act like a jealous ass, I kiss yours to forgive me."
Monica smiled and then came out and wrapped her arms around him. "True, but it's also because I feel the same way about you. I love you and only you, Alan Quartermaine. I also think you're the sexiest man to ever walk this earth. I fight the urge to rip your clothes off whenever we're in public. You would think with us being grandparents it would have slowed us down."
Relieved, Alan hugged his wife tighter. "We've been through hell and back, Lady. Why would age slow us down?" Monica laughed and they kissed. After a few moments, Monica broke the kiss.
"Okay, Birthday Boy, why don't you take a shower and relax? I'm going to finish preparing your birthday present." Monica said flirtatiously
Alan smiled as Monica walked over, picked up the chemise and robe and sauntered to the main bathroom. When she was out of sight, he began quickly taking his clothes off as he ran to the spare bedroom's bathroom.
Fifteen minutes later, Alan sat on the floor facing the fireplace, admiring the photo. He prepared a blanket bed in front of the fire and had wheeled the champagne and strawberries and placed them nearby. He heard the door click open and turned. Monica came out wearing the chemise and robe with her hair pinned up. She was wearing his favorite perfume, the scent lingering around the room. He could only stare, breathless. She was much more beautiful than when he first pictured her wearing it.
Monica sauntered over slowly to Alan, and then sat next to him on the floor. She kissed him gently on the lips. After they broke the kiss, he handed her a glass of champagne. After taking the second glass, they linked arms and drank.
"Monica, this picture of you is breathtaking. I can't show it off to anyone, though. Would you be offended if I put it in my dressing room at home?"
"Not at all, Dr. Quartermaine. I also have a 5'7" and a wallet size for you, too. That way, you don't forget what you have waiting for you at home when you're surrounded by all those attractive student nurses."
Alan felt himself getting stirred up. "I should be saying the same thing of you. Working with the young male residents, I must seem old by comparison." He began to trace the edge of the V neck on her chemise.
Monica also felt herself getting stirred. "Alan Quartermaine, you may be 63 years old today, but you have the vigor and "fitness" of a 33 year old. You keep me young with the way you chase after me like I'm some young vixen."
"Because you are to me, Monica Quartermaine." He turned and grabbed a strawberry. "And now, since it is my birthday, I would like to start the celebration, if it is okay with you, Fair Maiden"
"Of course, Prince Charming" She snuggled in tighter to her husband. "Happy Birthday, my love."
"Thank you, Darling. Now, are you ready?"
Monica smiled. "Willing and able" Alan placed the strawberry in her mouth and they came together in a kiss that sealed their loving bond.
THE END