Becoming Blaine Warbler
This is my first Fan fiction in a long time, but I had to write it. I love hearing from readers, it lets me know that you are reading.
And the Disclaimer: I do not own Blaine Anderson, the Warblers, Dalton Academy, Glee, or Darren Criss.
Becoming Blaine Warbler
Blaine Anderson was a "normal" high school freshman, or appeared to be a "normal" high school freshman. Appearances are not only what the receiver is seeing but how their mind perceives it. Blaine dressed like the other boys in school, only more "put together". While the majority of the male population of his small Ohio peer group wore hoodies and baggy jeans, Blaine dressed for success. He wore nice dark jeans, button down shirts, ties, and sweaters, looking like a mini adult. His peers thought nothing of it, as Blaine was the elected president of the freshmen class. He also spent his time with the theater department, and played soccer. He liked watching football, but the coaching staff thought he was too small to play, even on the JV team. Blaine was liked enough by his peers, and all appeared "Normal", whatever that was.
But Blaine Anderson was not "normal", unlike his peers in one major way. Blaine Anderson had a major difference in who he way. At fourteen years old, Blaine Anderson knew he was homosexual. If Blaine lived in Boston, NYC, or San Francisco he could just be himself with no physical threat. There still may be some name calling, but the culture in those cities was much more evolved that the culture of his small town. Ohio was not liberal enough to fully understand or accept that Blaine was just who he was, so he had to blend in, hiding the one difference that if found out would exclude him for the rest of his existence. But he had to allow his inner thoughts to be expressed, telling the world who he truly was. His journal was always on him or stashed away in his locker, safe away from prying eyes of peers or parents.
What scared Blaine Anderson the most was the idea of his family finding out, it was the most terrifying thought in the world. It wasn't that his parents didn't love him, it was the idea of shattering the perfect ideal that the Anderson family was. Blaine's father created his own architecture firm based out of the city, but lived and worked out of the office at home. His mother had inherited the family business, the only privately owned grocery store in the entire county. His elder brother Brent was a freshman at Berkley College of music, and his younger sister Briar was the sweet little pop warner cheerleader, who had the future of being the most popular girl in school someday. The perfect family, with the strong father, sweet mother, creative brother, darling sister, Blaine was thought to be the replica of his father.
If Blaine was to "come out" to his family it would destroy their way of life. He was his father's child, and with the prejudice surrounding the idea of a child being homosexual would kill Mr. Anderson. Mrs. Anderson was more accepting and loving, but it was known that she would follow her husband no matter what. Love was love but perception was more important. Brent would be fine with it, being older, wiser, and more accepting to all that was different. And Briar, sweet innocent little Briar would be confused, and would most likely follow in her parent's footsteps. With this knowledge of who and what his family were made Blaine stay within himself expressing his feelings to only himself.
Blaine kept a journal, one of the cheaper pleather journals he found at target for ten dollars. It was a plain brown pleather with pages that were ivory in color. It was the true expression of Blaine, and who he was. He wrote lyrics, favorite quotes, and his private thoughts. Most of these being about Jamie Howard, the captain of the soccer team. Jamie was the perfect specimen of a man in Blaine's opinion. Tall, tan, muscular, dark hair, blue eyes, almost a carbon copy of Superman. He liked Blaine, and on his first day on the soccer team told Blaine that someday he would be soccer captain. He made sure that Blaine sat with the upper classmen of the soccer team at lunch, and invited him over to play Mario cart.
Blaine wrote down everything in his journal, all of his feelings about his family, about Jamie, about music and theater, about his peers. So when one of his friends pulled it out of his backpack and shared it with everyone, Blaine's world shattered around him. It all just came crashing down, shattered glass at his feet. Burning him in a fiery inferno. Jamie went from being a friend to being the lead bully; his father didn't know how to speak to him. Everything that Blaine had worked so hard to hide was out in the open, and the perception of who he was changed completely. For everything that he truly was and allowed the world to see was overshadowed with the notion that all he could ever be was homosexual. He would not succeed, he would not do anything. He was just the freak.