title: give me your hands (and i help you through this)
fandom: teen wolf
ship: lydia martin/jordan parrish
summary: drabble in which lydia asks jordan to teach her how to fight
word count: 1369
notes: So, this is just a little something I had to write after the new trailer for the rest of 5a. I originally wanted to write the fight scene too, but I realised real quick (at least three hours at least) that I suck at writing fighting scenes, at least in English I sure do, so I decided to go with just a short little drabble when Lydia asks Jordan to teach her how to fight. Nothing more. Also, since I wanted to get this up pretty quickly, this was not seen by any beta, so I apologize for any kind of mistakes in there. Hope you enjoy. Likes and comments are greatly appreciated.
give me your hands (and I help you through this)
Lydia gets attacked not 24 hours after she took Jordan coffee during his stake out that lead all of them assume everything was fine and it was all just a fluke.
(Tracy's plan to get to Scott is to get rid of everyone around him who is important to him or could potentially help him, and her first picks ends up to be Lydia Martin.)
The only reason nothing serious happens is because only a few minutes after Lydia gets home and gets attacked by the brunette she wanted to badly to help to, Jordan shows up. He wants to thank Lydia for the coffee she brought to him (no, he isn't looking for excuses to see her) and he hears her scream as he approaches the front porch.
Things move pretty fast after that and at the first sight of Tracy being in danger, she flees. Bin the moment, Jordan couldn't care less. All he cares about is whether Lydia is alright or not.
Lydia, who hasn't said a word since she thanked him for saving her.
She is sitting on the couch in her living room, her feet pulled under her, her eyes fixated on the wall above the television in front of her. She seems deep in her thoughts when he enters the room with a mug in her hand, bringing some tea to her to calm her down after what happened.
Though, that is the thing. Ever since she sat down there, it seemed like she was completely calm. He doesn't know what frightens him more – the possibility of Lydia getting attacked so many times that it doesn't get to her anymore, or the chance of her pushing her real reaction aside for some reason.
He sits down beside her and extends the mug towards her. She takes it and finally looks away from the wall, only to glance down the mug and continue the staring.
They sit there for several minutes in silence before he decides to speak.
"Lydia- are you feeling ok?"
She stays quiet for the longest time. So long Jordan starts to get worried.
"For a few seconds there, I actually thought I was going to die," she eventually say, her voice barely above whisper, here and there shaky. He doesn't say a word. When he heard her scream through the door, for a second there, he thought he arrived too late as well. "I've faced so many things and I always came back ok, and still today I was on the floor, looking into Tracy's eyes and I knew that I couldn't get away even if I tried. She was too fast, too strong, too… good at fighting. And what am I good at. Spending twelve hours in heels without my feet hurting. Finding things in books – though, apparently, I'm not even that good at it either."
Jordan has never seen Lydia like this before – so vulnerable, so unsure of herself. He never thought she could ever doubt herself like this. What's there to doubt about, after all? She is an intelligent, strong, stubborn, beautiful woman who was perfect just the way she was. And now she is sitting here beside him and he's never seen her this broken before.
He moves and he softly places his hand on her back, rubbing it a couple of times in a reassuring manner. "Don't say that. You're so much more than that."
She finally looks up from the mug and their eyes meet. She forces herself to give him a small smile as a thank you, but they both know it's not genuine or that she doesn't feel like smiling. At all.
"I felt helpless in there. When she told me what she was doing, why she was here, my first thought was 'Why is she here then? She could make a much bigger first hit with taking out anyone else.' And then I realized. She thought she'd take the easy one out first. She's get me out of the way quickly, show that she's not one to be messed around and then move on to the other, before she finally get to Scott. And if you wouldn't have showed up, she would have actually succeeded."
"But I was here. Nothing bad happened."
"But I can't ask you to stake out in front of my house 24/7. Or anyone else, for that matter. I can't always be the girl who gets saved because she can't save herself." She lets out a noise that sounds like a chuckle, but there is so much bitterness behind it, Jordan doubts it could ever be considered one. "You know what's funny? I actually saved their butts so many times during this past couple of years. Even when I didn't know what the hell was going on."
She told about this during one of their late night dinners (with long hours behind them spent with pointless research). How they got locked into the school with a crazy alpha on the loose who wanted to get to Scott and how she saved the day with her intelligence.
He was so proud of her in that moment.
"And yet, somehow I always I end up in need of getting saved. I don't want that. I don't want to be the girl who has to be saved."
She pauses for a moment, and he thinks he knows where this is going and he likes the idea. He most certainly does. He hates the fact that she's so dependent on others when it comes to her safety, especially since she seems to be spending less and less time with those who are calling themselves her friends and who could protect her if anything should happen. And he really can't stake out outside of her house 24/7, no matter how much he would want to.
"You know, we've talked about this with Allison before she… "Lydia shakes her head and Jordan can hear the grief in her voice. His arms move just slightly, but that's enough for Lydia to lean into his touch. "I needed something from Peter and she didn't let me go alone after everything Peter has done to me. She was the one who jumped in when he got furious about I don't even know what anymore. When we left the place, I brought up her training and asked if she could help me with some moves. She said we should wait until things die down, and then we would jump right into it. Things didn't exactly go as planned."
Lydia didn't usually talk about Allison, and Jordan could completely understand why. The grief she feels is still very real and very new and it's hard to talk about those you loved but lost. He never pushed her, but cherished the memories Lydia decided to share with him, and this is no different.
(He wonders if she ever talks about her with her friends.)
"But, as much I was trying to convince myself that I might not even need to learn how to fight," she continues, and Jordan is brought back to reality, "I do. And I want to. I want to learn how to fight. And I was thinking… I don't want you to think this is a half a loaf is better than no bread kind of situation," she quickly added, looking at him concerned now that he might misunderstand the story she shared with her only a minute ago, "I don't even know why I told you that about Allison, but I was thinking—would you help me? Would you teach me how to fight?"
She is glance at him with nervousness written all over her face, and he wants nothing more than to make that disappear. How doesn't she know it by now? That he would do anything for her?
He starts nodding even before the last words leave her mouth. "Of course I'll help you." She gives him a small smile, a genuine one this time, and it was already worth agreeing to it for that little motion of her lips.
"So how about tomorrow afternoon?"
He knows her answer as soon as he sees the glint of excitement in her eyes.