The coughing fit made me turn from the window. James was sitting in bed, hunched over, a kerchief held to his mouth. I quickly went to his side and rubbed his back. His face was red, this was a bad one, and it took forever to pass. It was even longer before he lay back against the pillows taking quick breaths.
He reached out and squeezed my hand. It was his way of telling me he was all right. I gave him a small smile. He was due for a new potion to stop the coughing and relieve the congestion in his lungs. I wondered what kept Cedric from arriving with it.
Unbeknownst to myself, I sighed in frustration.
"It won't be long, Sophia." James squeezed my hand again.
My eyes went to him in surprise, but then I realized that he meant to reassure me that it would not be long before Cedric arrived with the potion. Or did he mean it won't be long and he won't be a burden to anyone anymore?
"Cedric will be here soon," I agreed, hoping that was what James meant.
My brother closed his eyes. His skin was pale except for around his eyes and his lips. It made my stomach turn to look at him like this. He was fast asleep before Cedric burst in, flustered and breathing heavy, nearly dropping the phial holding the precious potion that bought James a little more time.
James woke, smiled and took the liquid from Cedric. Even after all this time, he still made a face while drinking the vile substance. Cedric glanced at me, apologizing with his eyes. "How are you this afternoon, Lord James?"
"Tired." James closed his eyes again, leaning deeper into the pillows.
Cedric nodded and took the phial. Once James began to snore, Cedric jerked his head toward the sitting room, and I followed. Once we were alone he whispered, "There is nothing more I can do. I cannot find anything that will let him alive any longer." Although this was not a new subject, new tears gathered in my eyes and my throat clenched. I nodded. Cedric took my hand. "I asked his Grace to allow me to summon the dragon healers but he refused."
I looked down. "Why should he waste resources on healing James when he has a new son now? A healthy son." I could not believe the words came out of my mouth with such rage.
Cedric set the phial on a nearby table, then took me in his arms. I felt myself blush and hoped Cedric did not notice and at the same time felt guilty for enjoying being embraced by Cedric while my brother was dying in the next room.
"I've failed," Cedric sighed. "I'm so sorry."
"No," I whispered, my chin barely on his shoulder. "It was said James would not see his first year. It is miraculous that he has seen sixteen. You've done more than anyone thought possible in the time you've been here."
Cedric pulled away and I noticed that not only did he not meet my eyes, he stiffened, as if he had just realized that holding me was improper. "I will sit with him a while. You need rest, Sophia."
"Thank you, Cedric." I turned for the door to head to my room.