A/N: Part of 'In Love With a Bastard' series. Not necessarily the 2nd in the series. Just the 2nd one written.
WARNING: SLASH. INNUENDO. SEXUAL SITUATIONS.
Please be kind, review.
In Love With a Bastard: the sex thing
By
hpfanficfan
The situation was almost funny. But first of all...let him tell you that it is hard to believe that he was in love with with such an introverted and bitter man. The sarcastic, pessimistic old snake is impossible to understand and yes, still hard to get along with. Indeed, he was a very complicated character, carrying around a thorny attitude breakfast, lunch and dinnertime. Nevertheless, he is in love with the bastard, at least it is no longer unrequited.
They live together now and the man is no longer alone. Neither is.
They were content...until the sex thing.
The first time they made sex, he snorted and the man thought that it was a mock. Because unlike the young fellow, the old man was not beautiful, he was not handsome and he had too many scars on his too pale skin. They got nowhere after that.
The second time they attempted same activity, someone forgot where they put the lube. They went no further after that.
The third time they crawled into bed buck naked they kissed, and touched, and stroked. But there was no thrust. They slept after that.
The forth endeavour had ended in a bicker as to who should bottom. Someone ended up sleeping on the couch that was in the lounge. He huffed and puffed, and twisted and turned until he remembered that he was a wizard and transformed the couch in to a bed.
During their fifth effort there was no patience and they found that sex wasn't as good as described in fanfiction. The young man swore that he will never bottom again; ever, never, ever!
Next came their sixth attempt...
And the seventh...
Not to mention the eighth...
And each time, the two turned away from each other, letting the king size bed separate them from their counterpart.
Sealed away in misery and unresolved sexual tension, perhaps it was better if they did not have sex at all? The old man grunted.
But he persuaded the man to take another stab at the sex thing. He even offered to bottom and the man was pleased.
Once more they crawled under the warm, cozy duvet and...
...
...
A light seemed to come from within, as their worlds brightened with stars.
There was death, but only two little ones.
"Satisfied, Potter?"
Harry smiled sheepishly, sated but wondering how they had finally achieved the sex thing.
The comforter pulled half way up, sealing only the lower half of their bodies.
Their legs entwined, the pair fell asleep in the middle of the wide bed.
Oh, and they changed their mind; the sex thing was as good as described in fanfiction.
The end.
Has this one? Snape and Harry have agreed to play 'monkey in the middle' (the kids game, what were you thinking?) with every single reviewer! Yea!