Summary: Another effeminate China (My Fav!) with some problem too comfortable married couple have (they are becoming too comfortable, with nothing to fight on, getting fat and boring... Kinda)

disclaimer: Characters belong to Hetalia Axis Power and its author.

Warning: effeminate China.

Genre: Humor. romance.

Ah, I hate being a girl in an anorexic world.

They were cuddling nicely when the bomb dropped. China crawled over Russia's thigh, thinking of settling there and let himself be hugged by the Russian when suddenly Russia spoke casually,

"Have Yao gained weight, da? You seem heavier these days."

China stopped moving and stared at the Russian, hard.

Russia swallowed, regretting the casual talk he just brought up; the look on China's face made Russia hated himself for the disability of turning back the time, even for 5 seconds (he immediately wished he had something like the amnesia dust the fairy tooth had). How he regretted the lines which suddenly appeared on China's smooth forehead and those tears forming behind his eyelids made Russia speechless for sometimes after that.

"A…Am I? Am I getting fat, older, uglier, and not attractive to anymore? Is that so, aru?"

"N…No, Yao; I mean… I just commented… oh, come on, don't cry, I didn't mean… it was just a casual… forgive me, da?"

"I… I am too tired now, aru. I am going to bedroom. You can stay here and watch the show, Ivan." China stood up, hiding his tears behind his hands and smiled awkwardly while walked away to the bedroom.

Great. Another drama. Just when Russia thought their relationship getting cozy without any complications, another matter appeared. Looked like they would have something to quarrel on again. And great, because China was heating him up, leaving him half turned on.

*******

The phone beside him rang; making China postponed his stage of denial/ self pity and answered it automatically.

"Wei, Yao here."

"Yao gege?" suddenly he could hear the sound of crying Taiwan. China held his breath.

"What's happen aru? Why are you crying?"

"Yao gege… it's… it's Kiku nii… he said I was… I was… getting fatter, he said my waist is bigger and my measurements increased up… I…"

"He did speak like that to you? How dare he, aru!"

"No! I mean… he bought me this costume of Sakura from Naruto anime, and said he made it up to my measurements. But when I tried… it was a bit too small, especially on the hips and thigh. It ripped and Kiku-nii, he… he said maybe I am getting fatter and not he got the measurements wrong."

"… aru. I understand. Me too, I was… uhm, cuddling with Ivan and he suddenly suggested I am getting fatter. Heavier."

"He did say that to you? Oh! He was sooo rude!" Taiwan shouted at the phone, started to get heated up. She completely forgotten she was crying and pulled the phone closer to her face. "No way! I thought Ivan was like, way fatter than you! And I thought he was strong enough to lift three times your weight, Yao gege! You practically smaller than I do! Well, not in built, but I know you weigh less than me!"

"I know!" China snorted to the phone. "Oh, I don't mean you are fatter than me, aru. I know you weigh less and smaller built than me, but that Kiku… just like typical Japanese, aru, he cared so much about measurements! I know it must be hard on you aru! And Ivan… he was being… unreasonable, aru!"

"Yao gege, I think we need to do something. We need to show them that we are not lovable based on measurement and body weight. We need to tell them we are better than what they think! We need to do something!"

"Yes, I am thinking of that too. What should… aru! I know! We should get on a diet aru!"

"Together! It's better! And when they saw how beautiful our bodies are, Yao gege, then we will show them we don't need them to feel beautiful!"

China chuckled. "I totally agree aru. How about we exercise tomorrow?"

"Great idea! Ah! I can't totally wait to see their shocked face!"

"hmm… that would be fun to watch, aru."

"and Yao gege…? While we are on it, can you tell me what kind of… bed art Kiku nii likes? I am afraid he was getting bored of our usual … lovemaking."

China blushed. "Aiyah! Why are you asking me, aru?"

"Because… you two were so close together and I thought maybe…"

"No, aru! I don't know!" China blushed furiously. "Don't you start that! I don't do anything with my own little siblings!"

"Oh… I am sorry, Yao gege." Taiwan sounded apologetically and changed the subject. "Anyway… what are you doing—where are you now?"

"Oh, I am at home, in the bedroom. I was happily cuddling…. Well, not like it's your problem, but after Ivan said that I just lost my … appetite, aru. Aiyah! And you got me again! AHHH! Stop asking me these embarrassing things; aru!"

"Fine, Yao gege. I think you did the right thing to do. Left him after made him feeling aroused, Ivan must be very irritated right now. And hating himself for letting the golden opportunity of getting laid with you slipped away. Anyway, I think I must hang up. See you tomorrow, Yao gege!"

"See you, aru." China smiled softly, replaying what Taiwan had just said.

You did the right thing to do.

Well, maybe he was right leaving Ivan turned on like that.

TBC