A/N: Obviously this is Alternative Universe, but I'm just saying that so people don't bug me about that damn lottery ticket. If I can't accept that Donna isn't shallow enough to find happiness with money, leave me be. ANYWAY! This was inspired by a Graham Norton episode with Michael Sheen, this section in particular reminded me of Donna ( .com/watch?v=DyZGXovbto4&feature=related ), and whilst I had tried to go in a lighthearted direction, it seems I'm doomed to depress myself and others.
.
They lived in a small house on a mountain overlooking the industrial town of Port Talbot. From there they could see the steelworks, the smoke forced out into the world through high columns, fires licking at the air and the heat creating ripples in the vision. In the evening, water vapour would rise in front of the blast furnaces and smoke would hang thickly over the town.
It wasn't the kind of place Donna would have wished to raise a child, hoped one day for cleaner air and greener grass but each day, she made a habit of counting her blessings. She was blessed with her health, her son, a meal every night, a roof over their head…
And whilst the place they lived was bleak with industry and the air was heavy with pollutants, when night began to fall it was beautiful. It really was. Smoke was swept across a sunset, the vibrancy of orange and darkness of purple which anticipated the fall of the blackness of night. Another night she would spend alone. Lights sparked brightly on the steelworks and across the chemical plant, smoke would billow upward, capturing the light and fire.
It roused memories so deep within her that she couldn't remember them, try as she might, she couldn't reach them. She knew there was a time she was happier but couldn't remember when, knew there were people in her life that knew her better than she knew herself but didn't remember who. And sometimes, she felt like she was so far away from where she truly belonged.
Though she tried to shake the feeling, some days she would catch a glimpse of herself in the mirror and she looked so sad, but couldn't remember why. It was as if she was needed elsewhere, like there was someone she had left behind, someone who had made her life worth living and as she looked upon the shining lights that illuminated the steelworks… it was as if she had lost some beautiful place.
Some beautiful place beyond the stars.
Every night she would find herself outside, looking up at the stars and waiting. Just waiting. She didn't know what for, never remembered why she looked on with such longing, all she knew was that she was waiting for something that never came and would never come. And every night she would realise again that the sky was empty.
But as they both watched through the glass window, at dreamy lights and soft fire, she lied to her son and herself. "It's a fairy palace, Michael," she said softly to her son as she ran gentle fingers through ginger ringlets, smiled sadly as she kissed the top of his hair. Her own pain running much deeper than the eye could see and certainly much deeper than the innocent eyes of her son could perceive.
She knew this was no adequate place for a child, it was better he didn't know until they could both get away. And until they could, she would show Michael the beauty in life she couldn't see and hoped one day she could find the place that had once made her so happy.