So this is my first fan fiction please don't be too hard on me! :) I don't own Avengers or the characters only the plot

Black Widows POV

I grumbled as someone shook my shoulder hard making me stir in my sleep. My head swarmed and I felt a little ill.
"Five more minutes," I muttered turning onto my side away from the person.
"Natasha you need to get up Fury wants us all," I heard Clint say softly from beside me and I opened my eyes in a flash.
"What does he want this time?" I asked slowly sitting up.
"It's something about the collector," he said and groaned.
"Does no one get the picture. I hate that guy why do we have to go visit him?" I almost shouted in frustration.
"Natasha I know you hate him and I know you hate this day of the year but you must come with us we need you," he said and I glared at him murderously.
He made his eyes wide like puppy eyes and pretended to look sad. I hit him playfully and he grinned at me. The only people who knew we could be like this was the rest of the Avengers but most people thought I was a cold hearted bitch and Clint was the one who had to look after me.
We both had a very close connection to each other as our past had brought us together. Suddenly I remembered what day it was and my face dropped again. Clint pulled me close into a hug and I could feel tears welling up in my eyes though even if i wanted to I would never cry.
"Tasha they need us now," he told me softly and I nodded slowly.
Clambering out of bed I walked over to my wardrobe and pulled out my suit.
"Turn around!" I called to Clint and I heard him shuffle round.
Quickly I pulled my christmasy pyjama top and bottoms then pulled my suit over the top.
"Clint zip me up will you?" I asked and I heard his footsteps come closer to me.
I smiled as I felt his hands on my back then he zipped up my black outfit. I grabbed my belt from the side and quickly strapped it on.
"How do I look?" I asked sticking my tongue out and crossing my eyes.
"As beautiful as ever," he commented grabbing me and spinning me round.
"Liar," I smiled then walked out the door him following.
He was dressed in his usual purple clothes and his bow with arrows were already slung over his shoulder.
"Damn it I forgot my guns!" I shouted before Clint held them up in front of my face.
"Thank you!" I laughed as i took them and fastened them to my suit.
"Anytime," he said earnestly.
I smiled at him but I felt really uneasy like something bad was about to happen. Quickly we rushed to the bridge and through the door. Everyone else was already there and they all turned to face us. Steve was almost in stitches looking at me and that's when I realised I had forgot to do my hair.
Pulling out the bobble that was holding it up I then quickly combed through it with my fingers then fluffed it up.
"Over sleep again agent Romanoff?" Fury asked raising his eyebrow and I blushed.
Tony was grinning from ear to ear at my expression and I wanted nothing more than to go hit him.
"Now that we are all here I would like to tell you why I called you here. The collector has hold of many powerful artefacts including an infinity stones," Fury said standing in front of the board where suddenly there was an image of something red.
"The aether," I heard Thor mutter.
"What's the aether?" I asked puzzled.
"It's an infinity gem but the only one to be in a liquid form. It latches its self to that person and eventually kills them," Thor said and that's when I remembered about Jane.
"You must go check on the Collector because I fear he is planning something but I doubt he's alone," Fury said turning to Thor.
"You must be mad Fury. I saw him die I lost him!" Thor said before storming out of the door.
Quickly I rushed after him ignoring everyone's protests. I had to run fast as Thor took the biggest steps ever.
"Thor are you okay?" I asked softly.
He stopped short in his tracks and looked down at me with tiered eyes. Quickly he walked round me and carried on down the corridor.
"Thor wait!" I said running after him.
"Go away child," he spoke to me in a harsh way.
"Thor I'm worried about you are you okay?" I asked my voice getting worried.
Thor wouldn't normally speak to me like this he was normal on my side.
"How could you be worried about anyone Black Widow? You don't care about anyone because your just a cold hearted bitch!" He shouted at me.
I stopped still his words ringing in my ears. My heart pounded loudly as he turned round to face me.
"Natasha I'm sorry," he said his voice now tiered.
I was like a rabbit caught in headlights as he took a step towards me.
"Natasha I didn't mean it I just lost it I'm sorry," he said but he was too late.
I ran down the corridors sprinting round people until I reached my room.
Tears welled in my eyes but I wasn't going to let them fall. Not after I had held everything in for so long. Locking my room I walked straight into my bathroom and took out a shard of glass from my bath bag.
No one knew how insecure I was on the inside. My life had been a living hell so I had turned everyone else's into one. All that mattered in my past was the money. That was until I met Clint and he brought me to S.H.I.E.L.D. I pulled back my sleeves revealing the ruined pale skin beneath them. It had been a while since I lost it like this.
Quickly I brought the glass swiftly across my arm digging into the skin as I whimpered softly in pain. The thinnest trail of blood leaked out and I smiled softly. My only release. Again and again I brought it down until my wrist had several cuts going across it.
Suddenly someone banged against the door and I swore quietly.
"What do you want?" I shouted as I turned on the tap to run it over my arm.
"Natasha were about to leave are you okay?" I heard Steve's voice from the other side of the door.
"I'm fine ill be two minutes," I shouted.
Quickly I turned off the tap then dried down my arm. I applied some cream before finally putting on a quick bandage.
Rolling my sleeve down over it I opened the door only to find myself face to face with Steve.
"Damn you!" I shouted and he laughed.
"You ready to go?" He asked and I nodded.
We walked down the corridor in a comfortable silence as memory's swirled around my head. As soon as we reached the ship I walked over to sit next to Clint. Thor stared as me apologetically but I ignored him. Clint noticing the tension nudged me but I shook my head.
I leaned my head down to rest on Clint's shoulder and felt my eyes close softly before falling into a nightmare filled sleep...

So this is my first fanfiction please read and review. It will be a story on the collector mainly focused around the black widow and Hawkeye but all characters will be here! This will be a Clintasha fanfic but will be one sided Loki and Natasha :) xx
Clove Tonks Hatter