She wasn't that pure.
She imagined what it would be like to be with someone she loved. Never the sex, she couldn't picture that anyway but the contact, the skin on skin, the loving touch.
They lay next to each other, her side pressed against his, her leg thrown over his casually but possessively. The skin on his thigh was soft, just roughened with a spray of little hairs that lightly tickled her own skin.
Freeze frame. Print. Shift.
Her head was cradled in the nook of his shoulder, her cheek firmly implanted into the perfectly shaped spot, his skin delicate, almost vulnerable. Her hand rested on his stomach and sometimes she idly played her fingers around, feeling the skin stretched tightly over his abdominal muscles and the precise march of the hair from his innie belly button down his lower stomach.
Freeze frame. Print. Shift.
She lay on her side and he curled around her protectively, his chest gently firm against her back, smooth skin to smooth skin, and the heat coming off his body made her smile a little. His arm was flung around her, protective again, possessive too, and he took her hand, his fingers gliding into the spaces between hers, lacing their hands together.
Freeze frame. Print. Shift…
She never saw the whole picture. Only the spots where they were touching. His face… he had no face. She wasn't in love with anyone after all and she didn't want to spoil the daydreams.
She did however start touching people more. It wasn't anything naughty, just learning how people touched and what different skin felt like. It was swimsuit season and that made it easier too.
She laid her hand on Emily's arm when she spoke to her. Lotion soft. She held Marty's hand when she took her to the park. Firm grip with tiny delicate fingers. She gave Lizzie one armed hugs, leaving her arm casually slung around her sister's shoulders. So soft and always a little cool. And she did the same thing with Edwin. Thin and bony, warm against her skin.
She even touched Derek sometimes. He hadn't been nicer since he got her sick but he'd been… something and she almost didn't mind him as much. She put her hand on his stomach once to shove him into the pool and let her fingers linger there for a second longer before pushing and he fell in laughing. Warm skin pulled tightly over abdominal muscles.
One day she'll meet The Guy and fall in love and really learn to touch. And then she'll stop daydreaming. But that's for the future. For now, she had an imagination and she simply touched the people she cared about.
She was a good girl. Never believe otherwise. But she was a normal girl too.