Title: Purgatory
Author: Mirelas
Email: my address is in my profile.
Status: Work in Progress
Category: Angst, slight Romance (S&J)
Rating: PG-13 (May become R later on.)
Season/Sequel: See summary
Spoilers: Anything up to D&C
Archive: Anywhere that wants it. Please just ask first.
Summary: Takes place after Divide and Conquer. The team goes on a mission that turns out very bad. People injured, and one member ends up missing.
Disclaimer: Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.

Note: Thoughts are in Italics Like this




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"Why?" That's all Sam could manage to say as she walked out of the gate room. That's all she could think, as well.

Everything had been happening too fast for her resently. First of all, she found out that someone attempted to kill one of the members of the Tok'ra High Council, then everyone had to undergo that test to see if they were zatarcs, then Colonel O'Neill and Carter were accused of being one. Oh, but no, that was not the worst part. The worst part was when she found out that the Colonel has the same feelings for her as she did for him. Not that that was necisarily bad, she didn't mean that, it's just that they couldn't do anything because of some stupid regulations. Sometimes she just wished that those rules didn't exist, or even that she had never joined the Air Force like her alternate selves. Then, the most horrible part of her day occured, the events surrounding Martouf. He had been programed to kill the president. When the programing went off, he lost it, he had no control. So, Sam was forced to kill him. She shot him. It's my fault he's gone. No, I can't think that. It's those damn Gou'ald's fault. If it weren't for them, people would be free across the galaxy, everyone could be happy, and many people that I have known wouldn't be dead, she thought to herself. On the other hand, if it weren't for them, she would never have know all these great people that she does now, and she would never go on those great adventures. Why does life have to be so difficult sometimes? she thought as she walked to her quarters. She just needed to be alone. When she finally make it to her room, she simply couldn't hold it in anymore. She colapsed onto her bed, and started to cry her eyes out. She stayed like that for only a few minutes when there was a knock at the door.

"Go away!" Sam yell at whomever dared to interrupt her.

"I'm not going to do that." She would recognize that voice from anywhere. It was Colonel O'Neill. She didn't answer in hopes that he would go away. It didn't work however.

He opened the door, walked up to the bed Sam was laying on, and sat down beside her. He felt sorry for her. She had been through hell the past twenty four hours. He layed his hand on her back for support.

"How are you doing?" he asked her.

She sat up and looked at him. She looked terrible and felt like it as well.

"Where do I start?" She answer him.

"That bad, huh?"

"Oh, yeah." She wasn't sure what made her start telling him all her problems. Maybe it was that sweet, caring face he had at the moment. "I just can't believe he's dead, and that I killed him."

"Sam, it's not your fault."

"I was the one that shot him."

"You weren't the only one," he muttered under his breath. "He would have killed himself anyway. It was an act of mercy."

"Then why do I feel so bad? That look on his face, I can't get it out of my mind. He looked so pitiful, so scared."

"Maybe because you cared about him. Or at least Jolinar did."

"I don't even know how I felt about him. All I know is that Jolinar loved him. I've never felt that kind of love. Well, I might..." she cut herself off. She was not going to say how she felt when she couldn't even do anything abou it.

"I know," he says. He knew her so well, he could tell what she thinking.

Sam started to cry again. Jack pulled her into his arms and she didn't hold back. She cried on his shoulder. It felt so comforting to have someone hold her. A while later she pull back and looked at him. They looked into each others eyes. It was like they can read all of the others thoughts, see into their soul. They could see a lot of the same thing, caring and, knowing that it shouldn't be but, love.

"Sam..." he started.

"I know," she cut him off. It was almost like if she didn't hear it, it wouldn't be as bad. She then realized that wasn't true. It was just as bad. Why did they even have to make those regs?

All of a sudden, there was another knock at the door and Janet came in.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I must be interrupting something. I'll come back later," she said as she turned around and walked back out.

Sam stood up to go after her, but the Colonel reached for her arm. Sam looked back at him.

"Are you going to be okay?" he asks her.

"I don't know yet," she answer truthfully.

She left in search of Janet leaving Jack sitting on the bed. All he wanted was to help her feel better. He just didn't know how to do that.

Sam walked for a while, then she found Janet in her office. She knock on the door and walked in.

"You came to see me about something?"

"Yeah, but I guess I was interrupting."

"No. It's not like that. We were just talking." Janet looked at her suspiciously. "We were."

"Okay. I was going to see if you were okay. Are you?"

"I don't know," she answer, and then told her everything that she had just told Colonel O'Neill.

*****

The next week they had another mission. It was just a simple mission. They were mainly going there for some great ancient artifacts that they had seen from the MALP. Sam still kept thinking about Martouf, and the Colonel. She would try not to, but somehow every little thing would remind her of one of them.

So, for the first hour or so, Daniel looked at those lovely artifacts, and everyone else kept watch for unfriendly natives. As far as they knew, there weren't any, but they had been wrong before.

No one wasactually paying attention. Daniel seemed to be the only one interested in anything. Suddenly, something brought everyone's attention back. Jack was the first to see some figures coming closer. Apparently there was some life here that they didn't know about.

A staff blast flew by Sam. She was able to turn away quickly enough and it missed her. It hit Daniel, however, making him fall back. Sam ran over to see if he was okay. He was hurt, but he was going to live. It had grazed his arm. Teal'c pulled him up, and everyone started running back to the gate.

Jack and Sam fired on the approaching Jaffa while Teal'c helped Daniel through the gate. Then Sam suddenly heard a yell. She turned to see the Colonel laying on the ground. She ran over to his side.

"Oh, God," She gasped when she saw him. A staff blast had hit him right on his chest. Sam knew it was bad, very bad.

She tried to help him up but he stopped her. "Go," he said.

"No, I can't leave you."

"Go! Save yourself. You shouldn't die here with me."

Those words hit her hard. Die. No, he's not going to die.

"No. I can't."

"Sam, please, for me. I don't want to see you get killed here. I care about you too much to see you get hurt here, Sam."

With tears falling across her face she said, "Don't talk like that. This isn't the end."

He put his hand on her face, and wiped away the tears. Sam didn't even notice the shooting going on around them anymore.

Teal'c was then firing back, since Jack and Sam has stopped.

Slowly Jack's hand sliped away and fell to the ground. "No," she said softly. Teal'c came by, grabed her and pulled her to her feet. "We must go," he says. Sam treied to fight him first, she didn't want to leave Jack here. Soon, Teal'c had over powered her, and pulled her toward the gate.

When they made it there, he almost threw her into it. He soon followed.

On the other side General Hammond was standing there in the middle of the gate room. There were medics taking Daniel to the infirmary.Sam didn't really notice any of them. She almost didn't hear the General talking to her. She couldn't get over what had just happened.

"What in the world happened? Where's Colonel O'Neill?"

Sam couldn't answer him at that time. Maybe later, but not at that moment. She dropped her gear on the ramp and walked out of the room. She left Teal'c to explain to the General.




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Which version does everyone like better? The first person point of view or the third person point of view? Present tense or past tense? Personally, I like it this way and I think this is how I will continue the rest of the story. So, please R&R. Also I am now writing and uploading this story using HTML (For some reason fanfiction.net won't accept my .doc files anymore. So if you find any errors please tell me.
The next few parts will be rewritten and reposted shortly. And perphaps a new chapter will be up soon.