A/N: Okay, so after I wrote Bravery Lost, I was actually planning on making a trilogy of the Bravery series, and I was pleasantly surprised to see that a lot of people were asking for a threequel after I drove Draco &Hermione apart. Funny how great minds think alike, no? ;) Enjoy! Oh! And please note that all three of these fics can stand alone, so you don't have the read the previous two to understand this one. They do provide background knowledge, but things do get clarified anyways And now, without further ado…
She's avoiding me. Maybe she feels the same way I do. Maybe she hates me. Maybe there really isn't anything anymore. It's been hell without her. I dream of those eyes every night. I don't know which is worse, when I dream of the warm honey brown they become after making love, or when I dream of those blazing firewood brown eyes that threaten to set fire on me after a fight. Sometimes, though rarely, I dream of the liquid amber eyes that that reveal themselves to me so vulnerably when she cries. I wonder if she cried as hard as I did when she left. Those honey brown eyes just make me miss her that much more, but it's the fire in them during an argument that makes me fall deeper in love. This is an atrocious mess.
It isn't fair to Astoria. But she knows. I know her story, too. We never tell each other when we do this, but when we feel lonely some nights, we spike our food with Polyjuice potion. It's funny, really. I felt guilty the first time I did it our wedding night. I had scoured my room for Hermione's hair, and brewed a large concoction of the vile potion. It wasn't the same as making love to Hermione, and consummating our marriage almost seemed wrong. At least when I looked into those eyes, for a split second, I could imagine I was taking off a wedding gown on Hermione. After dinner, imagine my surprise when I realized it was Theo staring back at me in the mirror. I thought he was visiting me. As a ghost, I mean. Then, I realized perhaps Astoria and I were on the same boat. I never told her I knew, and I suspect she knows about Hermione. Silence is golden.
I'm not a man of many emotions, or words. I hardly show my emotions, at that, but I know she knows I'm hurt. I just need her to look at me so I can get confirmation that she doesn't love me anymore. Bloody hell, I just want to know so I can move on. Maybe if she showed signs of not loving me any more, I can learn to love Astoria. I don't want to be alone anymore. Letting go of Scorpius until the Yule holidays will be hard. He's the only thing… only one… keeping me alive. He shows me I'm not alone. He's the last tie I have to Hermione. Scorpius was our name. If I wasn't wrong, Hermione and the weasel were sending off Rose. Rose. Another one of our names. I wonder if she chose that name to get back at me for using Scorpius, or if she missed me. I don't know which to hope for anymore.
Wait! She's looking at me. Those eyes. I don't know how I can move now. I suddenly became aware of Scorpius yelling that I was clutching his hand too hard, but sighed in relief the moment my entire body relaxed. I feel numb. I'm guiding my entire family towards her, unconsciously. I suppose consciously, now, but I was not in control. I hope I don't reach out and snog her senseless. That would have been quite awkward, to say the least.
I have no idea how I even spoke. "Weasley. Hermione. And hello there, you must be Rose," I bloody swear I gagged afterwards. Her eyes turned fiery… and then melted to liquid amber. She misses me. But it was also that moment that I realized I couldn't leave Astoria. Over the years, I've learned to love her. Never the way I loved Hermione, but I loved her as a friend. A friend who was willing to stay because we understood each other. I could stand here and see Hermione, but Astoria will never get the chance to see Theo again. I knew how it felt to make love with someone who only looked like your lover through the Polyjuice potion. It was something I did often, and something I suspected we would do tonight.
"Malfoy, I'm a Weasley now, too."
"You'll have to specify to which Malfoy you're speaking to, Hermione," that was it. All the cards were lain on the table. We were both married. Perhaps a truth that both of us never really accepted until this moment. Her eyes spoke multitudes. She still loves me. I was astonished over the lack of control I had for my voice, because the next thing I said completely floored the world. "I still love you." It was one of those statements that hurt everyone. The entire world froze, or so it seemed. The weasel looked like he'd been punched in the gut. Tears were spilling out of Hermione's eyes. Astoria stiffened. Little Scorpius and Rose were the only two that didn't seem to be too affected; they were cheerfully chattering away about Hogwarts, from what I could see out of the corner of my eye. I'm not sure what I was looking for… what I was waiting for. Confirmation? She couldn't confirm anything. And even if she did… I wouldn't leave Astoria. I couldn't. It wouldn't have been fair. The same way she couldn't leave Ronald Weasley, the idiotic bloke whose smartest feat was to propose to her. He didn't deserve her, but who am I to judge? I'm an ex-Death Eater. At least the worst thing he's done was be too brash and jealous. The worst thing I've done was kill.
"I still love you, too. But it doesn't matter, does it?" No, it doesn't. "Draco, maybe it just wasn't meant to happen. Not in this lifetime." Weasley sunk to the ground.
"I knew you loved someone else, 'Mione. But… the Ferret?" He sounded strangely far away as he sank to the floor, obviously in grief. For a moment there, I felt for the bloke.
I closed my eyes, "If the world spun on a different axis… would you have stayed?" It was a loaded question, I know. I was asking for some sort of commitment on a level beyond even my own comprehension. I was asking her if she loved me enough to let us be known to the world. I was asking her if she still does love me enough to go public, even though we couldn't during current circumstances. I was telling her that I love her enough for all of that. I was letting myself be vulnerable, and asking her to do the same. I can be such a bloody git sometimes, especially with Weasley looking about to die at the moment from embarrassment and heartbreak.
"I would have."
"What's stopping you now?"
"The same thing that will stop you from being with me if I were the one who told you I still love you, first." Bloody hell, she has a point.
"I'm sorry."
"I left you."
"And I let you." I don't want this. This is hurting too badly. I ignored the Weasel, but I couldn't ignore Astoria. I knew she was afraid to lose me. She was afraid to lose all she had. I finally had to accept that I'd lost Hermione forever.
Somewhere in the fog of my mind, I registered the whistle of the train, and Astoria pulled Weasley up, and the two of them were about to escort our respective children to the train. I gave Scorpius a tight hug, telling him I'd write as Hermione did likewise to Rose. Afterwards, we were back in our little world. The world where only the two of us existed, trying to solve our own problems, battling with the voices in our heads. Before we reached any conclusion, though, the chug-chug-chug of the train began, and we were forced to turn and walk away when our spouses returned. I never looked back. I wonder if she did.
That was four months ago. Now, after the Yule holidays, we were here again, at the same Platform 9¾ where we first met and re-met. Weasley wasn't with her. Astoria had left me, so I was alone as well, with Scorpius. Astoria and I were still friends, but she had said she wanted to get over Theo the healthy way. Spiking my food with Polyjuice potion was obviously not her way of getting over someone the healthy to say, we didn't have drunken, Polyjuice spiked sex that night as I predicted. Maybe if we had consummated our marriage the normal way, this wouldn't have all happened. But I suppose I preferred it this way, as I'm now a free man to try and court Hermione. I suspect that the real reason Astoria left was that she wanted to give Hermione and I a chance. A true friend. I only wish I could have done something for her, but the selfish side of me just took her gift without anything in return. Perhaps I'll always be the same snarky Slytherin git on the inside.
She spoke first. "Ron wanted me happy. He left me so we could find our own happiness." Hope. That is the only way to describe how I felt the moment those words slipped from her lips. Merlin's underpants, I could bloody swear I hear someone singing Hallelujah in our presence.
"Astoria did the same, though she didn't confess it."
"Could we ever…"
"Hermione, I never stopped loving you. I would go back to the way it was in a heart beat. Anything's possible."
"Is it?"
"If you're brave enough to try." We kissed, again. At first, we bumped noses. I blame the nerves. When we tried again, it was sweet. Just like the first kiss we ever shared. We weren't snogging, but it was intimate and sensual all the same. I almost laughed at the collective "EW" that came from Scorpius and Rose. This was the way it was supposed to be. Us, as a family, with children that are completely floored and disgusted with PDA. I think our relationship finally found the bravery to happen. Miracles do happen.
A/N: OMG WHAT'S THIS? FF is finally letting me upload new stories, HURRAY!
Please R&R. To be honest, I like the second one best, I'm kinda iffy about this one... I love critiques! ;)