Disclaimer: Not my characters, not my verse, the mistakes however are all mine. Just playing in Jim's super fun sandbox.
Summary: A little around fun around Christmas, will get steamy Hari-Kari fluffiness!
Chapter 1
So there I was having a fantastic dream involving a certain kick-ass blonde in skin tight leather pants and a pair of handcuffs when my phone rang completely shattering my little delusional world, the universe hates me. I reached over fumbling for the receiver with my left hand which smacked against the bedside table, then the wall, then my face. My right hand slipped under the covers to my incredibly strained dick trying to ease the pressure and get a little blood to my other brain. Not sure it worked, because I went with: "Wonderland, this is Alice." Well, it could have been worse.
"Harry?" Came an uncertain Murphy voice. Oh God, dick tightening... there may have been some heavy breathing...
"Mmmmpppffffffftt," Yeah, that's me. Harry Dresden: master of the witty diatribe.
"Dresden, what are you doing?" the Murphy voice demanded suspiciously. Certainly not thinking about jerking off! "Dresden!" she demanded again. Hells bells, that didn't come out of my mouth, did it? Come, heh! Get a grip, Dresden!
"Ah... sleeping?" I mumbled. Yeah, because the cop's spidey senses weren't already tingling. She harrumphed loudly, letting me know that she didn't buy it for a second. But that she was Not going there, all the same. "Yeah, I've had this weird migraine all day..."I continued into the awkward silence. "...figured I'd take the day off. What's up, Murph?" I asked, I usually didn't need to ask. Usually she was like a freight train, monologing the problem, demanding I be somewhere and hanging up on me.
"I... was hoping you could do me a favour..."she trailed off when I yawned loudly, "Am I boring you, Dresden?"
I sighed, "No, Murph." I assured her, "Like I said, not quite conscious yet. What's the favour? Because I've got to warn you, the last time I did a favour there was a dinosaur named Sue involved..." Silence. No one appreciates me. The pressure in my dick began to ease appreciably.
She took a deep breath, "My mother is throwing a Christmas party tomorrow night, would you go with me? I know the holidays aren't really your thing. But there'll be good food and free beer..." she trailed off at my laugh. "What?" she demanded, I could tell she was trying to be quiet. She must have been at work, I'm not the most popular guy at the station at the moment.
"You had me at your mother, Murph. But ah... what about Kincaid?" I hated myself for asking. I wanted to take it back as soon as I said it. She was silent, I waited, sitting in my blessedly dark room hearing her breath softly.
Finally she murmured, barely audibly: "That's over, I broke it off." I waited for more, there wasn't any.
"I'm not going to say I'm sorry, Murph." I whispered doing a silent happy dance in my bed, grinning like a fool.
She sighed: "I know, Harry. You were right, he wasn't a Good Guy."
It was time to change the subject before things got awkward. "So ah... Christmas party? Do I bring anything? What's the dress code? What time should I pick you up?" I asked sitting up and running my hands through my unruly hair.
I heard a quietly relieved sigh, "We dress up, I'm Santa this year." I laughed and nearly choked to death while simultaneously falling out of bed with a crash.
"Dresden!"I heard her growl from my tangled and prone position on the floor, it took me a while to find the receiver again and press it to my ear.
"Sorry, sorry." I muttered over her grumbling, "Okay, so you're Santa. We could go for broke in the irony department, Santa's little Elven helper I could be."
I could hear the smile in her voice, "Fine, I'll pick you up at 7. We are not taking the wizard mobile, though." I was a little offended, my blue beetle is legendary. I told her so. She hung up.
It was 10 to 7 on Christmas Eve and I was feeling incredibly self-conscious in bright green and red angle-striped tights, I look like a giant candy cane... Red boots that curled up at the toes housed my feet and made me walk about with exaggerated care. I'd found a green tunic that hung to mid-thigh with a ragged hem and sleeves, it was belted with a wide bright red belt with a big black buckle. All topped off with a ridiculous red hat with green fluffy trim and pompom on the end. My favourite bit was the ears, I'd spelled them to get them just pointy enough. Very delicate magic that had taken a couple of hours and lots of failures to get right. I was musing about the dumbo ears I'd very nearly ended up with when I heard the tentative knock. I grabbed up the bits and bobs I'd prepared for the evening: spelled candy canes, magic sack and Murphy's gift.
When I opened the door revealing my ridiculous attire the sight that greeted me took my breath away. I froze. I stared. Karrin Murphy stood before me in a cheerfully red dress, the second one I'd ever seen her in. It was a strappy number that hugged her torso accentuating her slim figure and revealing for the first time the dimensions of her surprisingly endowed bust. It flared out at the hips to end tastefully at her knee. Her hem and cleavage was edged with white fluffy trim, as were her mid-calf height black boots that did incredible things to what little I could see of her legs. She had a hat similar to mine but with white trim instead of green. She was blushing under my scrutiny, I don't think I've ever seen her blush, hells bells it was cute on her. My mouth ran off without my brain, I knew this because it was open: "Why Santa, my you've changed. If I'd known that this would come down my chimney I'd have been a much better boy!"
"Close your mouth, Dresden." She smirked while I stared. My mouth closed with an audible click, but I just couldn't pull my eyes up to her face. "They're called boobs, Dresden." She chided gently taking a step closer to get her face in my line of sight.
"Sorry, Murph." I mumbled feeling my face heat. "You just look so—"
"Ridiculous," she supplied quickly.
"—beautiful," I finished, her blush deepened and ran down her chest. Don't think about it Harry! "You're cold," I murmured, "I've got just the thing." I bustled back inside and grabbed my duster. I settled it about her shoulders, just as she opened her mouth to protest, probably that it wouldn't match her outfit, or that I was being a chauvinistic pig, it changed to the same shade of red as her dress and white fluffy trim burst from the edges. I grinned. So did she.
"You ready to go?" she asked finally breaking the spell, I pressed the magic sack into her hands and popped her gift inside. The small package I'd added to the sack hadn't changed its size or weight at all. "What's this?"
"Why, Santa, it's a magic sack. You know for all the presents you'll be handing out." I answered closing the door behind me.
"And that package?" she asked.
"Even Santa deserves a gift at Christmas, Murph." I responded following her to her car. She opened her door using the key and stretched over to open mine giving me a delicious view of the red lacy strapless bra she was wearing. She glared daggers at me when she realised I was looking, but she didn't cover up.
The drive over to Mama Murphy's place was long and tension filled. The icy roads and heavy traffic didn't help, but that wasn't why. Neither was the fact that her radio was stuck on a shrill version of jingle bells, probably my fault. I let her have the quiet, not entirely sure what was up. Knowing that she'd tell me eventually. We're best friends, we told each other everything. Well, nearly everything. We didn't talk about our feelings for each other, she'd made it clear early on that that wasn't going to happen. We pulled up outside a quaint little home that I assumed to be Mama Murphy's place, there must have been twenty cars outside. Murphy hesitated before turning the engine off. Her hand still resting on the gear stick.
I took her hand, interlacing my fingers with hers, she let me. I squeezed her hand, "What's wrong, Karrin?" She turned the engine off with a sigh and turned to me. I just realised that she was wearing make-up, not alot, but more than I'd ever seen on her. Hells bells she's gorgeous. There were unshed tears in her eye's making them sparkle. I quickly looked at her button nose to avoid that soul gaze we'd danced around for a decade. I brought our hands to my face and kissed that back of her hand gently. "Talk to me, Murph."
The words exploded out of her in a rush: "My sister is pregnant." I saw the pain in her eyes saying the words had caused her. "And I'm still alone, playing with bad boys like—" I thought about yanking her over the centre console and into my lap and just holding her. I rejected it. Murph wasn't likely to let me, anyway.
I placed my free hand over our interlocked ones, I let her talk herself though it. Through the mistake of Kincaid; through the awfulness of her ex-husband building a family with her sister. When I was sure she was done and gathering herself together again I spoke: "You're not alone, Karrin." I squeezed her hand again. "Never alone." I murmured slipping out of her grip and jumped out of the car. I rushed around the car, opened her door and pulled her out. I pulled her to my chest in a hug; she hugged me back gratefully burying her face in my chest. I stroked her back in soothing circles until she was ready to go in. I felt it when her inner calm descended on her, settling around her shoulders like a cloak. I let her go without needing to be told.
She did all those little adjustments to her clothing and make-up that women do virtually unconsciously, that men don't understand at all. I watched as she pulled on her visiting the family mask. Hells bells, how does she do that? Just pull on a mask of Christmas cheer over all that pain? How many other masks did she have? I offered my arm which she took in silence and we made our way to the front door. Murphy hesitated at the door gripping my arm, I knocked, loudly.
Mama Murphy answered the door all rosy cheeks and smiles, Murph let go of me to give her mother the ritual hello they shared. I pulled a bunch of festive red flowers out of thin air making Mama Murphy's eyes widen and Murphy smile. I handed them over with a flourish and a bow, I know how to impress moms. It's a knack. "Hello, Mrs Murphy. May I say that you're looking lovely this evening?" She smiled at me in a knowing way.
"Come in, come in, Merry Christmas." She smiled shifting out of the doorway. "My, this is a little awkward." She murmured under her breath as she let us slip passed. "I didn't know you'd invited Harry, dear."
Murphy spun on her, "Awkward, how?" she demanded also under her breath retaking my arm determinedly.
"I invited Kincaid and Ivy, they're already here, he never said anything about you not..." she trailed off under Murphy's glare.
"Dammit," she swore, squeezing my arm. I patted her hand reassuringly, feeling completely impotent. "Mom," she continued in a voice that I knew she was struggling to keep level, "Never ever invite Kincaid or Ivy in the house again, okay?" Mama Murphy just looked confused.
"Ah, I could smack him around for a bit if you want." I whispered with a wink, Mama Murphy gasped and opened her mouth.
Murph turned to me and laid a hand on my chest, "We'll call that plan B, okay?" she murmured with a smile completely ignoring her mother's strangling sounds.
I kissed her on the forehead and then pressed my forehead to hers, "Just say the word, Murph." She nodded, tapped my chest twice and I pulled away. Her hand slipped down to mine and we interlaced our fingers by mutual consent.
"Come on, Dresden. I'll introduce you to the masses." She said yanking me along to an enormous backyard lit by multiple colours of Christmas lights in trees and along walls, both flashing and plain. There was tinsel and holly and brightly coloured ornaments hanging from everywhere. A life sized slay and full set of reindeer stood in the centre of the yard. There must have been 50 kids playing on and around it and running around the rest of the yard. There were 3 football matches playing on very large flat-screen TVs and about 20 men all watching them, beers in hand and shouting to each other and at the TVs. There was roughly the same number of women preparing salads, veggies, pot roasts and hotdogs for the kids. Everyone was in costume. Over all this, Barry White Christmas music blared.
I took two steps into the yard and was over-whelmed by the bright garish lighting and the loud sounds assaulting my ears. Everything became more than a little weird and disjointed. I lost my sense of which way was up right about the moment my body went numb and I lost contact with the only thing keeping me conscious: Murphy's hand in mine. My vision went black, I heard Murphy shout my name in surprise and then nothing. A whole lot of nothing. It was kind of nice.
The first thing I noticed was that Barry White was still playing. The second thing I noticed was Murphy calling my name from a long way off followed by a full armed slap across the face. After that everything came back pretty quickly. Someone was breaking my hand in a vice grip, I squeezed back weakly as the rest of my senses returned. "Murph," I croaked, "I'm going to need that hand." The vice grip eased some, but didn't let me go. There was a sudden weight on my chest constricting my breathing. I opened an eye to check, it was Ivy. Dressed as an elf as well, the girl has good taste. I squeezed Murphy's hand again and she got the message.
"Honey, ease up a little, he can't breathe." Ivy jumped off me, embarrassment plain on her face. "God, Harry, what the hell happened?" Murphy demanded helping me sit up. I blinked several times as she came into my field of view, I grinned when I got reacquainted with her cleavage. "You're a pig, Dresden!" She growled and tipped my eyes up to her face. She was smiling though.
"Ah, sorry. I think I feinted—" I was cut off by a snort, I looked up to see Kincaid standing over Murphy who was on her knees beside me. "This is a private conversation, hell hound." I snarled at him.
Both Ivy and Murphy exclaimed: "Harry!" in exactly the same tone indicating that I was being very rude. I didn't care. Ivy started talking before I had the chance to tell him to get the hell away from us. "It was all the magic," Murphy started to interrupt her but she forestalled her with a raised hand. "The magic of family and friends, of the love. I was disoriented myself for a time, though I have experienced this many times. There is a great deal of love in your family, Murphy. It has been known to cause black outs in wizards that haven't..." she trailed off looking to me, unsure whether to go on.
I finished the thought for her, finally understanding why this time of year was so difficult for me: "in wizards that didn't truly ever had the love of family and friends around them when their magic was first developing." I felt Murphy squeeze my hand with both of hers. I returned the thought with a squeeze of my own without looking at her. "I'm okay now," I assured them. "And from what I understand Santa needs to collect presents to put in her magic sack. And I need one of those free beers..." They helped me stand up, I swayed precariously for a minute. Murphy quickly steadied me with an arm around my waist.
They got me seated as far away from the TVs as we could get before Murphy went in search of that beer. Ivy, bless her, prattled on about something or other. I wasn't listening, I heard the occasional word such as reindeer, elf, snow, gift and grunted in the silences. It seemed to satisfy her before she launched onto something else she needed to tell me. Kincaid just stood next to her, stone still, not blinking, watching the crowd for threats. I watched Murphy interact with clan Murphy, she bestowed hugs and kisses, firm hand shakes and friendly smiles with everyone who crossed her path. I'd never really thought of her in terms of clan Murphy before: as the big sister, aunt, niece, cousin. It made for slow going in terms of finding beer but it suited her down to her toes. She did seem to fill the sack at the same time though, yay for multitasking. By the time she'd come back she'd finished her beer and half of mine, she looked a little sheepish when I pointed that out.
She'd brought a loud hailer with her which shrieked in pain as she turned it on; she grimaced at me apologetically before taking a few steps away from me. I have that effect on technology. The Barry White was turned down. This had the feeling of one of those family rituals, I watched her intently. Ivy had fallen silent and was doing the same next to me. She took a deep breath and winked at me. "Ho Ho Ho," she began in a feigned male voice, "Merry Christmas!" There are shrieks and shouts as fifty kids and 40 adults all descended on us, the kids crowded around Murphy the parents stood towards the back watching with a mixture of amusement and boredom. They had all been through this before.
"What time is it?" she asked, only just before the kids yelled: "Present time!" Then she did something I didn't think I'd ever hear her do, she sang. On her own, with no musical accompaniment at all:
"You better watch out,
You better not cry,
You better not pout,
I'm telling you why,
Santa Cause is coming to town…"
The first verse was all her, strong and clear, she had an incredible voice. After that the kids joined her, not quite drowning her out on the loud hailer but coming pretty close. I watched on with a familiar sense of detachment as she handed out presents to all the kids. She new every one of them by name sending them off with a hug and a kiss, a present in their grubby paws and one of my spelled candy canes in their mouth. The adults all got a gift as well, all but me and Kincaid, the last of which went to Rich the icky brother-in-law, ex-husband bastard. When he came forward to collect his gift she threw it at his chest from 7 feet away, to a number of quiet chuckles from those recognised as having to be her brothers. The youngest chirped: "No ass kicking this year?" to gales of laughter from all the men with Murphy genes.
I couldn't help it, my mouth is directly connected to my heart sometimes. "The night is still young, Dick." I growled into the pregnant silence, louder than I'd intended. There was a second of stunned silence, Murphy looked a little panicked, I could just see them all thinking: "Who the hell is that guy?", before the bubble burst into laughter once more. Dick ambled away muttering under his breath.
Murphy shook her head at me, "This over protective grouch is, my friend, Harry. Elf by night, wizard by day," she whispered theatrically as the parents ambled away. The kids were lapping it up. I stood up and bowed with a flourish to their applause, on my way up I pulled a red rose out of thin air. Or up my sleeve… I presented it to her with another flourish. I could tell she wanted to growl at me, and tell me where I could shove that. But instead she curtsied prettily and accepted it with a smile. Then she surprised me by slapping my bottom and shouted "Tag, you're it!"
"Thanks boss," I grumbled, using a little magic to amplify my voice and the loud hailer to give off a comical puff of blue smoke. I rubbed my but and winked at the kids theatrically. They all giggled hysterically. Murphy vacated the spotlight and left me with the kids. I performed a number of the tricks my dad had taught me when I was a boy, and a few I had later worked out from watching him. The kids loved it, and kept calling for more until supper was announced. It was exhausting.
I slumped down to a bench gratefully. Murphy came over with a cold one and pressed it into my hands. "Marry me," I murmured fervently before taking a long hard pull. She slid down next to me and pulled the last of the gifts out of the magic sack, my one to her. She turned the cloth bag over in her hands a number of times before pulling it open. It was a pentacle much like the one she already owned, with some additions, and much better silver work on my part.
"Harry, I already have a key to your place." She said with a frown pulling out the old one from her handbag.
"This isn't just a key to my place," I smiled, "Here, let me show you." I held it up by the chain and said in a clear imitation of her: "Find Harry." The pentacle swung vertical in my direction. When I said stop it swung back down. "Light." It glowed with purple wizard's light before I stopped it. And my personal favourite: "Oh, shit!" and a blue shield suddenly formed in front of us, it was Murphy sized. Her eye's had widened in surprise at some point, and she was smiling in amusement at the last voice command. I took her hand and waved it over the pentacle; it changed or appeared to change into a silver pendant. It was a small and utterly inadequate rendition of what she looked like under my Sight. I'd never described to her what I saw when I looked at her with my wizard enhanced Sight. I could never quite find the right words. It was a defending angel, my defending angel.
She gasped, "God Harry, it's… it's beautiful." She whispered taking it in her hands and lifting it to the light, she snorted daintily and said "Light." Purple light shone from the little angel in her hands letting her see it better.
She studied it while I spoke. "You remember what I've told you about the Sight?" she nodded, "People look different under my Sight depending on the state of their souls and the kinds of people they are. That's what I see when I look at you, Murph. I… I just… wanted you to know that." She looked up at me then, a complex expression on her face. She took my hand with a sad smile. Which of course was when Mama Murphy came over with her heavenly food and sat with us chattering about the grand children and thanking me for the entertainment and asking where I'd found candy canes that turned peoples mouths different colours and ears different shapes. At this point Murphy froze, mid-chew to glare at me. She'd been sucking on one all evening. Her mouth and was the same colour green as my outfit and she had pointy elf ears just like mine. "My, what pointy ears you have, Murph," I grinned just dodging out of her reach before her slap could connect with the back of my head.
Kincaid and Ivy came to sit with us, I had to hide my grin at what my candy canes had done to them: Ivy's mouth was purple and her ears had grown to three times their normal size, completely over powering her face. Kincaid's Mouth was blue and he had the ears of an elephant, neither of them seemed to notice… I saw Murphy doing the same thing, our eye's locked for a second and we lost all our self control and broke into fits of giggles. They looked at each other, apparently saw what I'd done to them for the first time. It was so comical that we laughed even harder, we had to hold onto each other so we didn't fall off the bench. Eventually we quieted gasping for air, still hanging onto each other. Ivy was smiling, Kincaid was glaring.
Murphy patted my arm to get me to let go and passed me the pentacle, "Would you?" she asked turning her back to me. I put it on her in silence, lingering a second or two more than I should with my fingertips brushing her skin. Ivy was staring at it in wonder.
"Harry, that's an impressive show of skill. How long did you work on it?" she asked spooning a carrot into her mouth.
I made a face, "Er…" I looked at my hands making as if I were counting on them, "Carry the 2…" I muttered. Murphy kicked me under the table. Mama Murphy snorted loudly. "Ow!" I complained glaring at her, "About 4 months… give or take…"
I could see Murphy doing the mental arithmetic now, "That's when we encountered that, crazy love-belt Red." She murmured. I nodded, I could see the 'oh' form on her lips but she didn't give voice to it. At some point in the meal a case of beer was left next to our table, I ploughed my way through it while Ivy quizzed me on how I did it. It was a long, technical discussion of ingredients, rituals and storage vessels. When we wound down, Murphy asked in a quiet voice: "Man alive, Harry what did all this cost you?"
"Nothing that a few hugs couldn't fix," I shrugged, after all the soul grows back.
Ivy's reaction was more that a little disproportionate. "Harry no!" she yelled at me, jumping to her feet. Everyone was a little shocked at her outburst, so was I. "Not soul fire!" she hissed, "Harry you'll burn yourself out."
Know-it-alls are so annoying! Murphy had my arm in a vice grip, "Harry, what's she talking about?" she demanded.
"It's nothing really, Murph." I replied patting her arm, "Soul fire kind of uses up a person's soul," her grip tightened on my arm, "but it's not dangerous if you know how to use it. Besides I only put a very small piece in there to keep the magic fresh. And it grows back in the fluffy moments."
Kincaid grunted, "You have no idea what you're playing with, Dresden." I glared at him and opened another beer, my 4th or 6th… shrug, I lose count.
"I've been using it for years now, and I'm fine. So stop with the scare tactics and leave it alone." I growled and pried Murphy's nails out of my flesh so I could carry on eating. She'd drawn blood, I wisely ignored the fact.
"Have the headaches started?" Kincaid probed, Murphy's hands froze over her plate, she blessedly kept her mouth shut. I gave him a flat stare. "When they do, you need to stop using it. Completely. Or it'll kill you. Or worse." I hate it when the Bad Guys show a little humanity.
"What's with this sudden soft spot for me, Kincaid? You sweet on me or something" I smirked.
He grunted again, "Self preservation. You have the potential to be one seriously badass wizard if you survive long enough to teach you a little caution. You've already taken on far more that you should be able to handle and survived, by the seat of your pants usually. Seriously badass wizard, without a soul, without a conscience… Doesn't bode well for this corner of the world." I think it was the longest speech I'd ever heard out of him. Murphy was worried, hiding it well but worried all the same.
There was blessed quiet for some time in which I was allowed to eat in peace before Ivy started up again: "Let me get a look at y—"
I cut her off: "No, I'm fine." She was going to protest further, I could see it. Dammit, I've never been able to say no to kids. I let my cutlery clutter to the table and whisked her to her feet. "You and me, dancing, now." I pointed a steady finger at Murphy, "Don't go anywhere, you're next." We danced for a while, nothing spectacular. Just lots of twirls and spins, the song was too quick to do too much in anyway. Ivy still found a way to talk though. Eventually I relented and let her look. She wobbled a little but that was her only reaction.
"Your headaches have started?" she asked, concern on her face. I saw Kincaid and Murphy whisk passed us on the dance floor. Dammit. I nodded trying to keep an eye on them. "Harry, this is beyond hugs. You need to speak to the council about this! Or…"
"I know." I sighed, "I'm not going to use it for a bit."
She saw where I was looking and smiled, "You love her?" I nodded. "She loves you."
"Is that a question?" I demanded sending her out for another twirl.
When she came back I'd lost sight of Murphy, "You should be together." She continued as if I'd never spoken.
"Oh, yeah. I can totally see that happening: Hey Murph, make love to me to save my soul? No kid, if it's gonna happen, it's not gonna happen like that." I heard a sharp intake of breath behind me, fantastic, now someone probably thinks that I'm a paedophile if they caught any of that. I turned us casually to find Murphy and Kincaid behind us, she stared at me for a second before Kincaid whisked her off again. Oh God. "CRAP!" I hissed.
Ivy didn't seem to notice. A slower song came on which allowed for more talking, she took full advantage while I tried to follow Murphy's retreating form. "She'd do it, you know," she whispered, "Her journals are pretty explicit about just wha—" I stopped. Dead. I knew Murphy wrote in a journal, I'd never even thought to warn her about this. Ivy was short for Archive, the archive is a supernatural being that instinctively knows everything that's written down, everywhere. Hells bells, she was going to kiiiiilllllll meeee, d-e-a-d, dead!
"Stop, Ivy those are private. I know you can't help knowing it but you should never pass on anything like that." I growled marching over to where Murphy and Kincaid were. There seemed to be a little trouble here. I noticed her four brothers advancing on them as I was before I noticed why. Kincaid had a hand on her ass and another on her torso just beneath her right breast. She had both her hands on his chest keeping him at bay. Angry words were being spoken, I pushed for speed and got there before her brothers. "We're cutting in," I said bluntly and loudly over whatever they were arguing about. I don't know what my face looked like but from the rage I was feeling and the look on Murphy's face when she saw me told me it was pretty fierce. Ivy was panting next to me from trying to keep up with my pace.
Kincaid had murder in his eyes but let go of her at the look on my face. I offered her my arm in silence, she took it and we turned our backs on him. The music changed to a waltz, I bowed over her hand and whisked her into the music, and it didn't take long to figure out that with our height differences it just wasn't going to work. So I used a little shield magic that I'd been practicing. One minute she was a foot shorter than she needed to be, the next she wasn't. I'd created a horizontal circular shield around me for her to stand on, she didn't miss a step. I was the perfect gentleman, touching her only lightly and only where the dance required it.
She broke the silence first, "Thanks Harry," she whispered, barely audible.
"For what?" I asked innocently, "I didn't do that for you, you could have kicked his ass to hell and back." I smiled, she snorted gratefully. "But your brothers were going to start a brawl…" I trailed off and twirled her slowly so that she could see the four men still watching on, still tense. She waved at them as she turned round, and they went back to their TVs. "Protective bunch..." I observed.
She harrumphed, "Too protective by half, and still you got there first."
I shrugged, "I was on my way to you in any case." Her eyebrows rose.
"If this is about what you said to Ivy—" she began.
I cut her off, "It's not, though I guess we have to talk about that too..." I trailed off spinning her away from me briefly, when she was back in my arms I continued: "...Murph, you should consider not keeping a journal anymore." She just blinked up at me, somewhat confused.
I let her get there on her own; it didn't take her long. "Oh God, Ivy... and you're telling me... what did she—" I cut her off quickly, before anything was reveal that couldn't be taken back.
"Murph, I don't know what's in them. I'd never let her share that, that's yours." She broke off the dance and hugged me fiercely. I hugged her back enjoying our new relative heights.
"You're a good man, Harry." She murmured into my collarbone. "Could it ever come to that?" she asked quietly, "Could it get so bad that you need... sex... to save your soul?"
I stroked her hair, "No Murph, I know how all this must seem... I swear to you, I didn't create that pendant using soul fire to get in your pants." She laughed at that easing away so she could look up at my face.
"I never thought that, Harry." She giggled against me. Murphy. Giggled. Without provocation. Oh God, I'm an idiot. She'd said the word. I pulled out of the hug. She looked disappointed.
"Murph, say stop." She looked confused but complied her eyes cleared quickly, her confusion turned to anger. Before she could say anything I jumped in. "I'm sorry Murph, that's not a word I thought I'd hear you say any time soon or I'd have said it earlier. The bit of soul in the pendant has a side effect; you can feel what I feel. I managed to tie it to a word so it didn't happen all the time—"
Her anger faded, her hand came up to my chest. Just resting there, not pushing, not yanking. "God, Harry, that's how you feel when you hug me?" I nodded, "No wonder it's good for your soul," she smirked. "Do you ever think that it's a little crazy that we can say that and neither of us thinks it's insane?"
I shrugged, "Insanity is all relative Murph." She rolled her eyes at me and froze, looking above my head.
"Speaking of things that are good for the soul..." she trailed off. I followed her gaze up to a sprig of mistletoe hanging above us. I opened my mouth to say we didn't have to do anything. That we didn't need to kiss if she didn't want to. She stopped me with her fingers over my mouth. She reached her other hand up and entangled it in my hair. She drew my face down to hers and pressed her forehead against mine. Was this really happening? We were going to kiss. No crazy wammy, no CPR, really kiss. Us. The fingers on my lips travelled down to my chest. "Sex." She whispered, a twinkle in her eye. She took a deep steadying breath somehow taking on what I was feeling. "Kiss me, Harry." She whispered again.
I brought my hand to her hair, just the one. The other rested over hers on my chest. "Karrin, are you sure?" She growled deep in her throat and stretched up to me. Her lips brushed mine shyly, barely touching me. She caught my lower lip between hers and sucked on it tenderly. I leaned down letting her settle down on to her heals and responded softly letting her set the pace. She deepened the kiss changing the angle and knocking her teeth against mine. Then her tongue was running along my teeth, seeking entrance to my mouth. She was making little sounds against my lips, asking me to open to her. I did, allowing her tongue to ease into my mouth. She tasted like the beer we'd been drinking, of her mother's turkey and my spelled candy cane. Her tongue explored the contours of my mouth while mine concentrated on playing with hers. Our eyes locked, I couldn't look away from her pretty intense blues.
Our eyes locked and for the first time neither of us looked away. I could never look away again. A pressure began to build up rapidly behind my eyes followed by a weird yanking motion, though I hadn't moved. Suddenly I was somewhere else entirely. I looked around reaching for the only weapon that I had, the Sword of Love. That's weird, isn't that at Harry's place? It flared to life in my hands illuminating the room in a soft glow. It looked like Harry's apartment, blackened with soot and interspersed with piles of ash. Each pile had a completely unburned object sitting on the peak. A copy of his pentacle, for the brother he couldn't save from his own inner demons. A mound of ash covered in blood, just blood, Susan's blood. A sword, for Michael, for not being able to help his friend when he needed it. A sword for Shiro, a coin for that fallen angel that had lived in his head, an apprentice's robe for Molly- they went on deeper and deeper into his apartment. Hundreds of piles of regret and shame for some fault he saw in himself that had caused pain in those he loved.
I turned to find Harry standing beside a pile of ash. For some reason my eyes were drawn away from him to the pile. Atop the pile stood an angel, beaten and bleeding but strong and proud, it reminded me a little of the pendant that he' given me. "This one is for you," he whispered. With an effort I tore my gaze from his depiction of me, and focused on him. He flinched. It killed me to see him flinch from my eyes. I studied him, he had manacles of ice on his wrists and a kind of black razor wire twined up his arms up to his neck where an imprint of red lips was tattooed to his skin. There were cords of gold surrounding his chest, they seemed to be squeezing the life from him. He was bleeding everywhere, how does he stand it? My God, I have to help him!
Without thinking about it I placed my hands over his icy manacles and was shot through with the cold dread of his fear that he would become a monster at the hands of Mab. The razor wire pulsed, I took a deep breath and touched it. Over whelming disgust for his own darker side coursed through my veins. The tattoo on his neck revealed his debilitating guilt over Susan's fate. The bands around his chest revealed his overwhelming love, for me. Such love. Such passion. Such need. Such longing. For me. How could he stand it?
A mirror slipped out of the floor in front of us, it showed me as the defending angle that Harry saw with his sight or third eye or whatever. It showed Harry as this monster: all big scary teeth, big sharp claws, misshapen hairy limbs. "Oh God, Harry." I whispered turning to him in a hug, "You aren't a monster."
I slingshot back into my reality so hard I thought I might have whiplash. The sensations coursing through my body, both my feelings and Harry's. It was incredible to know what he was feeling when we kissed, all I wanted was to rip his clothes off and go at it right here right now. He stiffened against me and pulled out of the kiss. I felt a hot, blazing rage begin to build in my gut. It was a completely foreign sensation to me, but not to Harry, I could see it in his eyes. What had he seen to bring about such anger? He was saying something, but the ringing in my ears was so intense that it wasn't getting through. He grabbed the pendant and ripped it from my neck breaking the chain. Suddenly the burning pit of rage was gone. I saw it continue to build in his eyes. I'd never seen him like this, it scared me. I looked away before he could see the fear in my eyes. He reached over and grabbed my neck, pinching it in the way I taught him. What the? "Don't hate me, Murph." He whispered as everything went black.