Disclaimers
ABC owns all the rights to the Grey's Anatomy characters Callie and Arizona
No Beta so all my mistakes are mine
This finale was so good that I still can't get it out of my head. The Callie/Arizona story line made me very happy but I wished they had more screen time. This recaps the events of the finale and shows what each could have been thinking during them. It will eventually go into what happens after they make up. Their thoughts are in italics. Enjoy!
When the Shooting Stops the Silence is Deafening
Alright, you're just going to walk in, ask for the chart and leave. There's no reason to even run into Arizona because she'll probably be in a patient's room. Callie takes a deep breath and pushes open the door that leads to the Peds floor. Arizona is leaning on the counter by the nurse's station reviewing some files. As soon as Callie walks in Arizona looks up from her charts. Perfect, I'm not even on the floor for a second and I see her. "Jason Perkins" Callie says as she walks up to the nurse's station while avoiding eye contact with Arizona. The phone rings while Callie is anxiously awaiting the file so she can leave but when the nurse hangs up the phone she says something that makes any hopes of leaving impossible.
Arizona watches Callie walk in and ask for her file without even glancing at her. She won't look at me. I know we're broken up but friends can still look at each other. Attempting to take her mind off things she asks the nurse on the phone to page Little Grey but instead the nurse informs her, "We're on lockdown."
"What, why?" Arizona asks in surprise.
"Oh come on." Callie says. This is so not happening.
"This has to be joke." Arizona says risking a glance at Callie to see if she knows anything. "It's a drill or something?" But before she can say anything else a small symphony of pagers go off all confirming the same truth. "Ok, this is no joke." Arizona states as her staff gathers around the nurse's station. "Everyone, everyone." Arizona says getting their attention while Callie looks down at her pager confirming the horrible truth that she's now stuck on this floor. "We're sealing the floor. I don't know why and it doesn't matter why. But no one goes in or out past the double doors." The group of doctors and nurses listen carefully as she speaks. "You go check on your patient's and then you come back and check if we have any others in que. We don't have a lot of hands on deck. And people, do not alarm the makers of the tiny humans. They will eat you alive." Arizona finishes in a warning hoping to keep this quite for as long as possible.
Callie inwardly smirked at the tiny human comment until she remembered how upset she was with the blonde. As the crowd thinned Arizona picks up the phone but speaks directly to Callie. "I really thought that it was joke."
"Sick joke." Callie mutters under her breath.
"Excuse me?" Arizona asks in disbelief at Callie's statement.
"Uh, nothing." Callie responds while looking at her blackberry.
Ok that's it. What is going on with her? "What? What you can't be stuck on the same floor as me? That's a hardship for you?" Arizona asks with annoyance lacing her voice.
"Yeah, frankly it is." Callie replies curtly as she grabs a chart and goes off to find the patient's room leaving behind a stunned Arizona. Just in and out to get a chart from Peds No reason to see Arizona… yeah right.
XXX
Just breathe. You can handle this, you're a doctor, you're a professional and you're not going to freak out. "We have what forty-two kids, four doctors and nine nurses. It's not enough" Arizona exclaims after hearing the status reports from her staff. Way to not freak out Arizona thinks grumpily to herself.
Until now Callie has done everything possible to avoid speaking to Arizona. Being stuck on the floor is bad enough but making small talk is asking too much. Callie can hear the tension in Arizona's voice and she can't help but notice the stress on her former girlfriends beautiful face. I know I'm mad but I can't just stand by and watch her freak out. Taking a breath she breaks her silent treatment. "Why don't you just put all the kids in the play room?" Arizona immediately looks at Callie in shock that she is actually speaking her and relief that she is helping. "We don't have enough staff for a whole floor. So at least they'll all be in one place, one big room and we keep an eye on all the kids all at once." Callie offers trying not notice how even more amazing Arizona looks when the stress leaves her face. Focus Callie.
"You can't put a bunch of sick kids in the play room with all their beds and everything." An intern pipes in. Barely taking her eyes off Calliope, Arizona quickly replies, "Sure we can. Stable ones can walk and we have wheelchairs so let's do it." The staff quickly disperses to put the plan into action.
"Thanks" Arizona tells Callie while breathing a sigh of relief. Maybe she's back to normal now and the whole cold shoulder thing is over.
"Whatever." Callie mutters in an uncaring voice as she walks away.
Then again maybe not. Arizona watches in disbelief as Callie again walks away from her. I know we're on lock down and she can't really go anywhere but this whole walking away thing is really getting on my nerves.
XXX
As they are moving children down to the play room Arizona is trying cheer up the little girl she is pushing in a wheelchair. However, her thoughts are filled with Calliope and how she has been acting. This is going to drive me crazy. I have to get to the bottom of this. No sooner does she think this then she hears the irritated voice of one Calliope Torres.
"Hey, watch it." Callie says as they nearly have a collision with wheelchairs they are each pushing.
"Sorry." Ok, no time like the present. "I thought we were going to be friends?" Arizona asks as her and Callie walk down the hall.
"You wanna talk about this now?" Callie asks in disbelieve. "We're on lockdown moving kids, God knows what's happening and you wanna talk about this?" We're in the middle of some type of crisis and she thinks now the appropriate time to talk about our failed relationship.
"Well, we're stuck here and we have to be together, so yeah I wanna talk about this." Arizona says completely confused by Callie's behavior. I thought we were doing alright. I mean besides that kiss in the elevator, which I couldn't help myself from doing, we've been pulling off the friends' thing.
Taking a deep breath as they continued wheeling down the hallway Callie quickly replies. "Ok fine. I tried being friends, rising above. I tried that and now I'm over it. I'm going to go the more traditional route of totally hating your guts." She says firmly as she turns into the playroom leaving Arizona with a shocked expression. What the hell?
XXX
Arizona follows Callie out into the hall after they had placed the children in the playroom. This is ridiculous! I try to be friendly and make the breakup as pain free as possible she hates my guts? I'm in love with her and she hates my guts. You have to be kidding. Arizona is outraged at Callie as she quickly moves in front of the taller woman blocking her escape down the hallway. She's not walking away from this conversation. "I don't deserve this. I have treated you with nothing but respect and love and..."
But Callie cuts her off with her Latino temper already rising. "No see that's the thing. You think you have but you haven't." Love and respect my ass. You make me fall in love with you and then you break my heart.
"I'm sure that it feels great to act like I'm the bad guy but that's the biggest load of," Arizona remembers that there are still tiny humans in earshot, "you know what that I've ever heard." She finishes in a loud whisper with her eyes narrowing. How did we get here? To her hating my guts?
Callie's voice immediately changes to a very serious and angry tone. Fine Arizona, you asked for it. "I have spent the last month trying to convince myself that I don't need kids to be happy." Callie hates admitting that even though they were broken up she was still trying to figure out a way for them to be together. "Really trying. Giving lectures to myself and saying it out loud to you and to Mark and turning myself inside out to want what you wanted. And then I stopped for a second and thought did you ever try to imagine what it would be like to change for me? Because I don't you think did." Her temper is almost full throttle as she looks at the blonde in front of her. I loved you with my whole heart and you crushed me. I wanted to spend my life with you and you threw it back in my face. Callie's anger only increases as does her voice while she continues. "What you did was dismiss my dream. My dream! Which says to me that you don't give a rats ass if I'm happy." You didn't even care enough to try and change. "I never understood squat about who you are and now I do and I don't like it." Callie finishes with a disgusted voice. She attempts to storm off down the hall not sure where she can go because of the stupid lockdown but before she can take more then three steps Arizona quickly moves in front of her to block her way.
You don't get to walk away from this conversation, we're not finished yet! "Oh really, really?" Arizona says in an irritated tone. "I'm supposed to change for you? Why, because we're in love?" the blonde says slightly sarcastically. "Because you fall in love all the time, men, women…" Arizona trails off in an accusatory tone finally voicing a fear that she has had since the start of their relationship. This is why I tried to not date you in the beginning. I don't date newborns. It never works and now I'm paying the price. You don't know what you want and if I change for you and you leave me I'll be devastated. Before Arizona can continue a nurse quickly wheels Ruby down the hall towards her and Callie.
"Dr. Robbins's, her appendix." The nurse explains as Ruby moans in pain.
Arizona immediately snaps back into doctor mode and leaves to get the needed supplies but Callie follows her determined to finish the conversation. "When are you going to forgive me for not being a good enough lesbian for you?" the olive skinned woman asks in a frustrated tone. I stand up to my dad and get disowned for dating you but that's not enough to show that I love you?
Taking a breath Arizona replies, "When you do something to convince me that you're falling in love with me and not with being in love." Callie was right, this is the wrong place for this conversation but it's too late now. I can't believe I'm finally telling her this and in the middle of an argument no less. She continues gathering medical supplies without looking at Callie. Arizona's heart pounds in her chest as she continues. "When you do something to convince me that I'm different from George O'Malley, Erica Hahn, Mark Sloan or the girl at the coffee cart." Something that proves that you want me. Just me and that I'm enough for you. Arizona finally turns to face Callie noticing a stunned look on her face. "I mean you have a huge heart and I love that about you but I don't trust you. Why would I?" she finishes in a tone that suggests this was most obvious statement in the world. I've always been afraid that I was just a phase for you. That you'll wake up one day and realize that you never really wanted me but more the idea of me.
Callie just stands there dumbfounded as Arizona finishes her rant. I never knew she felt that way. But before Callie can say anything the nurse finds them. "Dr. Robbins, her appendix." "POW" she mouths as both Callie and Arizona rush back to Ruby.
XXX
In the medical exam room Callie can't help but replay the conversation in her head as Arizona tends to Ruby. "I don't trust you. Why would I?" Those words had stopped Callie dead in her tracks. The whole argument up until then had made sense but that statement altered everything. It broke Callie's heart and shocked her that Arizona felt that way. I love her. As if she's even in the arena as George or Erica. Yes, I loved them both but not like I love Arizona. She means everything to me. She's my whole world and all this time she never knew. I never made her feel how important she is to me. Callie brought back to the scene at hand as she hears Ruby whimper in pain.
"Squeeze my hand. Tight, tight, tight."Callie tells Ruby while Arizona gives her a shot. "Wow you're strong!" Callie says bringing a faint smile to the little girl's lips.
Arizona briefly looks up from her work on Ruby to stare at Calliope. She's so good with her. I can see why she wants kids. She'll make an amazing mother. As Arizona is gazing at her Callie looks up. I know were broken up and in the middle of a fight but when she looks acts like this all I want to do is beg her to take me back. Arizona is about to look away when she sees Calliope's expression turn to fear at something behind her. Arizona quickly turns around and feels her blood run cold as she sees a visibly upset man holding a gun standing in the doorway.
Oh God please don't shoot. Barely able to think let alone speak Arizona finds that she can only utter one phrase, "There are only children here." Then she turns her back towards gunman as she covers Ruby who's crying for her mother. There are only children here. Arizona keeps repeating it over and over in her head unaware that she's actually saying it out loud. Frozen with fear she can do nothing but offer protection to Ruby who thankfully is not facing the door.
Oh God. Stay clam. Don't freak out. Protect Arizona. Protect Ruby. Please don't shoot. A million thoughts race through Callie's mind as she sees the gunman appear in the doorway. One moment she is smiling at Arizona and the next she is looking a killer in the face. It takes Callie a moment to process and collect herself enough to have a response. Arizona informs him it's a children's floor and then she appears to go into shock muttering the phrase over and over again under her breath.
"They shot me." He mutters in disbelief as he holds the gun in one hand and blood drips from his left shoulder.
I have to do something to get him to leave. I just need to get him to leave. Callie stands slowly so that she wouldn't startle him. Stay calm. "Mr. umm?"
"Clark." The older man replies while clearly fighting off the pain of his bullet wound. "Gary Clark." he tells her as he watches her rise from the stool.
Callie takes a deep breath to calm her nerves and slowly makes her way around the bed Ruby is laying in. Just be calm and don't look at Arizona. You're going to lose it if you look at her. "Mr. Clark here are some bandages." Callie says as she very slowly reaches onto the table for them. Keeping her eyes on Mr. Clark she can hear Ruby crying for mother and Arizona softly repeating in staggered breathy words, "There are only children here."
Callie begins to tremble with fear but she forces herself to continue with a steady voice. "Press them to the wound and it'll stop the bleeding." She offers them to him but he makes no move to get them. "Just take them." Callie tells him. Very slowly he reaches out his right hand covered in blood which is also holding the gun to get them.
Stay calm. Stop shaking. It's almost over. Give him the bandages and ask him to leave. Don't touch the gun or he'll think I'm trying to take it. Put the bandages in his hand and ask him to leave and stop shaking damnit! Callie very carefully places the bandages in his hand with only a slight tremble visible in hers. "Take them. Take them… and go."
At that he sharply looks her in the eye. I'm going to die. Please don't kill me. Please don't shoot. After the longest moment of Callie's life he says, "Thank you." in a gasping voice as he slowly staggers back down the hall and away from the exam room.
It takes Callie a moment to compose herself as he leaves. I could have died. She then quickly slams the door shut and turns around. Thank you God for protecting me.
"I want my mommy!" Ruby cries as Callie makes her way over to the frightened child noticing that Arizona is still in a state of shock muttering that phrase. I just have to give her time to come out if it. "I know you do sweetie and she's going to be back soon." Callie says soothingly as she attempts to calm down Ruby.
Callie gets more concerned for Arizona as she stays frozen in her protective position over Ruby still repeating that phrase. But Callie can't address Arizona directly. I have to try and calm them both down. "But you know what until she gets here you have the best doctor in the whole world here with you right now. Yeah, Dr. Robbins is the best doctor in this entire hospital, I think in the whole world."
At the sound of her name Arizona slowly starts to realize the danger is over and she begins to breathe normal. He's gone. I'm alive. Calliope saved us. Arizona is still tense with fear but she starts to listen to Callie's soothing voice.
"People feel so much better after she helps them. Sometimes people feel better just after she walks in the room." Callie continues talking to Ruby but silently hopes that Arizona understands what she is doing. "Cause she has got this super magic smile and when she smiles at you everything gets better." I always feel better when you're nearby. Callie takes her eyes of Ruby to look upon the tear streaked face of the woman she loves.
Arizona stares back with wide eyes at Callie as she calms Ruby down. She's calming me down too Arizona realizes. Only Callie would find a way to do both. Arizona watches Calliope in awe as she talks to Ruby and tells her how amazing she thinks Arizona is. Listening to her speak Arizona realizes how much Calliope loves her. She risked everything without even thinking to protect me. And now even after the danger is gone she's still looking after me.
Callie briefly gets lost looking into Arizona eyes trying to see if she is alright. Realizing that she has stopped talking for a moment Callie quickly returns her gaze to Ruby and starts up again. "You don't know it because you have your back turned to her right now but she's giving you… wow she's giving you her best super magic smile." Callie finishes with a smile of her own sensing that Ruby is calm now. "Isn't that right Dr. Robbins?" Callie asks as she looks back over to Arizona. Please say something Arizona. I need to know you're ok.
Arizona takes another deep breath feeling her heart start to slow down as she looks at Calliope. How could I have doubted that she loves me? She risked her life for me. She's amazing. She's… everything. Understanding that this is Callie's way making sure she is alright Arizona finds her voice to answer. "Right, I am Ruby."
"I gotta call the police and tell them what happened, ok?" Callie whispers trying not to alarm Ruby.
Arizona senses that Callie wants to say more but knows now is not the time. "I'm… I'm good." Arizona manages to get out while Callie brings her hand up to caress Arizona's cheek. Calliope's soft touch causes a million emotions to run through Arizona as she briefly closes her eyes. Relief, calmness, safety but most of all love. She loves me.
Callie doesn't want to leave Arizona's side but she knows that the police need to be notified. There is no time to further check on Arizona and make sure she is ok but Callie can't just walk away either. As Arizona is telling her that she is good, Callie reaches out to stroke her face. I need to know you're safe. Please understand that I love you and I won't let anything harm you. Arizona briefly closes her eyes at the touch and Callie lets out a sigh of relief knowing that Arizona is alright. Slowly removing her hand Callie makes her way over to the phone. I can't believe what just happened.
XXX
Shortly after Callie called the police the Swat team came to the Peds floor and escorted everyone safely outside. Callie and Arizona stayed with Ruby neither able to talk about what had just happened. Once outside they made sure that Ruby was safely inside the ambulance before shutting the doors and watching it speed away. Now with Ruby taken care of there is nothing to distract them from the current situation and everything that has happened. They slowly turn to face each other, looking into each others eyes as if seeing the other one for the first time in months.
Arizona looks at Calliope with fresh eyes. I'm completely in love with her. She saved me. I had just yelled at her an hour ago. I all but mocked our love when I asked if she expected me to change just because we love each other and after all that she saved me. I froze, I couldn't move. So much for being a good man in a storm. But Calliope… Arizona notices the gorgeous Latino giving her a quizzical look. She's really does love me and I always knew that. It was stupid of me to ask her to prove her love. My own fears and insecurities about being left behind and abandoned. What if she had died protecting me? Just trying to convince me that she loves me? At these thoughts Arizona is overcome with feelings of guilt and fear and she has to get away. I just need to clear my head before I say anything meaningful to her about my actions and our whole kids issue. I don't want to push her. That's all I did today, the blonde thinks ruefully.
"I'm going to go see if kids need help finding their parents." Arizona tells Callie as she turns and walks away, pulling Callie out of her thoughts.
While Callie watched the ambulance leave she quickly realizes that this is the first chance she has had to be alone with Arizona since the gunman. Turning to face her Callie is once again stuck by how stunning Arizona is. I love her so much. Thank God we're alright. I can't believe that this all happened. Is she ok? Are we ok? I know she told me that she's good but I never got to really ask her. Callie raises her eyebrows giving Arizona a quizzical look and trying to silently ask if everything is still good. I have never been so scared in my entire life. I could have been killed. I could have lost her…I know that having kids will make me happy but not having Arizona will destroy me. I have to tell her that she's all I need. Kids or no kids it's her that can't live without. If I had lost her… Callie is shaken from her thoughts as Arizona talks about helping kids find their parents as she begins to leave.
Watching her walk away Callie feels her heart constrict. She's not ready to have Arizona out of her sight. I have to tell her now before we fall into the same pattern. After today there's no time to waste and she has to know. "People died today. People are dead." The words are painful to say. Admitting out loud what happened makes everything more real. Arizona quickly turns at Callie's words, surprised that she is bringing this up. Callie's beautiful face reflects the stress of today's events but even more it shows her resolve about what she is saying. Taking a breath to push back the thoughts of what could have happened to them Callie continues, "I don't wanna have kids if it means I can't be with you." There. Our problems are solved. Now please come back over here. I'm not ready to be separated from you.
Arizona slightly shakes her head as the shock of what Callie is saying sinks in. She's willing to give up everything to be with me. I know how badly she wants kids but she'll sacrifice her dream to be with me. "No, no." Arizona says in a gentle tone not wanting Callie to misunderstand what she's trying to say as she walks back over to her. I have to fix this. She has to know that I love her too and that I'll change for her. I love her and she's everything so of course I'll change.
Looking directly into Callie's eyes Arizona feels a weight being lifted as she says, "We'll have kids. We'll have all kinds of kids." Callie's face quickly turns to one of surprise. Of all the things I'd thought she say that was no where on the list. I finally agreed to not have kids so why is she willing to have them?
"And I always thought that I wasn't cut out to be a mom." Arizona continues as she voices a concern that she's had since Callie brought up the whole baby thing. "But you'll be a great mom, you'll be an amazing mom." Arizona says while she remembers how Callie was with Ruby. At those words Callie feels her eyes fill up with her first happy tears in months. She's changing for me. She loves me! Happiness spreads through Callie as Arizona continues.
"And I love you so much and I can't live without you and our ten kids and…" Unable to resist it any longer Callie cuts Arizona off by pulling her into a heart stopping kiss. When the woman you love offers you your dream there's nothing else to do but kiss her passionately.
Arizona is completely taken by surprise. I have to make sure she knows that I need her. That she's everything. Arizona had planned to say more, to tell Callie how she feels and hope that the dark haired woman would take her back but all thoughts leave her head as soon as she feels Calliope's lips on hers. Not normally one for PDA Arizona is momentarily stunned as she feels Calliope demand entrance into her mouth. Quickly responding Arizona raised her hands to pull Callie in closer. I finally her have her back they both think as they passionately explore each other's mouths. Relearning the familiar terrain of each other's bodies their hands are everywhere. Wanting as much contact as possible to prove they are alive and safe. When air becomes an issue they pull away breathlessly with their foreheads still touching unwilling put more then an inch of space between them.
"I love you too." Callie says with a smile gracing her lips while breathing in the familiar scent of Arizona. This is where I belong.
Arizona remains content to just keep her eyes closed and feel Calliope's closeness. It isn't until this moment that she realizes what could have happened to them in that exam room. Everything could be so different. What if Calliope has been shot? Slowly opening her eyes just make sure Callie is real Arizona finishes what she had be trying to say before Callie kissed her. "And I'm sorry" she whispers trying to keep her voice from breaking.
Callie had been basking in the comfort of being back in the arms of woman she loves until she hears Arizona apologize. "Ari," Callie begins "what are you sorry for?" It feels so good to use her nickname again.
Arizona pulls back to look Calliope in the eyes but as soon as she does she feels her control break. After everything that happened earlier, Arizona is unable to stop the flood emotions that she had been trying to keep at bay. Don't breakdown in the middle of the parking lot. Keep it together. But despite her best attempts Arizona can feel her eyes fill with tears threatening to fall at any moment.
Quickly realizing that her girlfriend was on the verge of an emotional breakdown Callie pulls her into a hug. "Shh, it's ok honey." she whispers into Arizona's ear while running her hands up and down the shorter woman's back in the hopes of calming her. We need to talk about everything, but not here. This is the last place either of us wants to be. Promptly coming to a decision Callie says, "Let's go home."
"Home?" Arizona questions meekly as she pulls back from the hug slightly. We don't have a home because I was coward and moved out.
"Home." Callie states definitively as if she's been waiting say this to for a long while. Which I totally have. "Otherwise known as my apartment where you have been desperately missed. I hardly recognize the place without your clothes overtaking my closet and the Scooby-Doo toothbrush in the bathroom." Callie says earning a laugh out of her girlfriend. "Home." She continues in all seriousness. "Where we dance around to music and eat romantic dinners of pizza and fall into bed together." Callie finishes remembering some of her favorite memories.
Arizona looks up into the eyes of the most amazing woman she's ever known and feels herself fall even more in love. That sounds wonderful but then we'll have to talk about what happened and that could mess things up for us. We're finally on semi-solid ground and I don't want to ruin it. Quickly thinking of reasons to stay at the hospital Arizona starts saying anything that comes to mind. "But what about the tiny humans? I mean there are plenty of them that haven't been matched up to their parents. And they could use our help locating them and…"
Callie slowly puts her finger over Arizona's lips halting her rant and smiles. "Ari, do you really want to stick around and deal with a bunch of freaked out makers of tiny humans? They'll eat you alive, you know." She says with a smirk as she quotes her girlfriend.
Arizona can't help but laugh at Calliope's comment. Why, I am worried about talking to her. We're going to be fine. "That's true. The makers of tiny humans can be quite furious when they're alarmed." She says continuing the familiar banter with a grin.
Callie finally feels some of the tension slip away. There's that super magic smile. "So home?" she asks again while taking Ari's hand.
"Home." Arizona confirms while she gives Calliope's hand a squeeze as they make their way across the parking lot toward their home.
So if you made it this far hopefully you liked the story. This was my first fanfiction so any reviews would be greatly appriecated. Thanks!