I rewrote it. Be happy. Be healthy. Papa John's. (Where the heck did
that come from?)
Chapter One: The Zhang He River
A young girl grimaced as she pulled herself along side the Zhang He River and sighed. It was tempting to just drink it's waters and die peacefully but her pride wouldn't let her. Clutching her side, she glared at the water and spat in it. "I'll never drink from this river." she said glaring at her own reflection.
Pain splintered through her side forcing her onto her back again. Unwillingy, tears of pain and sadness mingled and slid down her cheek as she laid back. Wincing briefly, she closed her eyes. "I'm sorry. . .Brother. . ." she sad as she lost consciousness.
Zhang He stood in his tent. He'd been the general over seeing the battle that had just taken place. Amazingly, Wu's forces had broken through the last defense around his troops and had dwindled them down enough for himself to become involved. Even his two of his three officers under him had fallen and the last was badly injured. This had come almost as an embarrassment. The small force shouldn't even have gotten through the first wave. Much less the one that was gaurding him. The leading officer had come as an annoyance as well.
She had been Lu Da-Xia of Wu, a younger sister to one of Wu's finest, and her officers and men had pushed through miles of men and two officers. Even though their forces had been badly dwindled in the end, they'd still managed to put a hole in Cao Cao's forces here. Another battle, and this pass could easily belong to one of Wu or Shu's territories. Zhang He was only to be here for the time being, and if either force sent at least one of their best general's and enough men, there would be no one to protect it.
Zhang He walked out of his tent and mounted his horse. He'd have to find Lu Da-Xia before darkness had a chance to set in, or else she might never be found. It was doubtful she'd be found now. It was already a day after the battle. What would Cao Cao use her for? He had enough women in his tent and enough children to spawn his new country. What would he use this one for?
Lu Da-Xia had been lying there after the battle. After being injured by a stray gaurd of Zhang He, all she could do was dart away as far as her legs would take her and wait to die. Even though her wounds had stopped bleeding, she could feel it fester. Infection was setting in bad enough for a fever and slight hallucinations. (Gosh, I guess it can happen but I'm not a leading authority or anything.) She was waiting to die now, as her fever worsened and her body went more limp. It wouldn't be much longer now. . . A couple days if the wildlife didn't get to her first. (ppl just don't live long without water.)
Sighing, Lu Da-Xia looked at the river again. It wouldn't do any good to get upset now. She was going to die in enemy hands but not by them. Her brother would be upset, but there wasn't any helping that now. All she could do for now was to wait for death's door to open.
Zhang He found her by the river. She'd had her hand on her side and was sweating enough to shame swine. Zhang He dismounted and picked her up. He wasn't even holding her that close to him and he could feel her fever. Her body had done it's best to try to cope but it wasn't enough. She was almost drenched in her own sweat and still had a high fever. Grimacing slightly as her soaked body touching his, Zhang He put her over his horse.
Her clothes, as thick as they were, clung to her figure, showing every curve in her body and magnifying it. Even though Zhang He had seen this, he didn't pay any attention. Although women could be beautiful creatures and seemed to emit grace itself, they could also be trouble. Cao Cao often complained of his many wives and children behind them. If anything, they were better left alone.
Zhang He mounted his horse and turned it about. Lu Da-Xia stirred in her sleep as the horse started at a gallop back to Wei's camp. "Brother?" she murmured turning Zhang He and squinted as if she couldn't really make out who he was; then, she went limp again and fell back asleep as the horse picked up speed.
Man, I rewrite the first chapter and it's still short. Sorry, I know I'm an imbecile about such things a lot but I just can't do somethings without moving on to another chapter. Otherwise, it's just crap. Well, review because I'd always like to hear what you think. If you think there is another way that this thing can be improved I'd like to hear it. Even if you flame me, I won't get mad. Promise.
A young girl grimaced as she pulled herself along side the Zhang He River and sighed. It was tempting to just drink it's waters and die peacefully but her pride wouldn't let her. Clutching her side, she glared at the water and spat in it. "I'll never drink from this river." she said glaring at her own reflection.
Pain splintered through her side forcing her onto her back again. Unwillingy, tears of pain and sadness mingled and slid down her cheek as she laid back. Wincing briefly, she closed her eyes. "I'm sorry. . .Brother. . ." she sad as she lost consciousness.
Zhang He stood in his tent. He'd been the general over seeing the battle that had just taken place. Amazingly, Wu's forces had broken through the last defense around his troops and had dwindled them down enough for himself to become involved. Even his two of his three officers under him had fallen and the last was badly injured. This had come almost as an embarrassment. The small force shouldn't even have gotten through the first wave. Much less the one that was gaurding him. The leading officer had come as an annoyance as well.
She had been Lu Da-Xia of Wu, a younger sister to one of Wu's finest, and her officers and men had pushed through miles of men and two officers. Even though their forces had been badly dwindled in the end, they'd still managed to put a hole in Cao Cao's forces here. Another battle, and this pass could easily belong to one of Wu or Shu's territories. Zhang He was only to be here for the time being, and if either force sent at least one of their best general's and enough men, there would be no one to protect it.
Zhang He walked out of his tent and mounted his horse. He'd have to find Lu Da-Xia before darkness had a chance to set in, or else she might never be found. It was doubtful she'd be found now. It was already a day after the battle. What would Cao Cao use her for? He had enough women in his tent and enough children to spawn his new country. What would he use this one for?
Lu Da-Xia had been lying there after the battle. After being injured by a stray gaurd of Zhang He, all she could do was dart away as far as her legs would take her and wait to die. Even though her wounds had stopped bleeding, she could feel it fester. Infection was setting in bad enough for a fever and slight hallucinations. (Gosh, I guess it can happen but I'm not a leading authority or anything.) She was waiting to die now, as her fever worsened and her body went more limp. It wouldn't be much longer now. . . A couple days if the wildlife didn't get to her first. (ppl just don't live long without water.)
Sighing, Lu Da-Xia looked at the river again. It wouldn't do any good to get upset now. She was going to die in enemy hands but not by them. Her brother would be upset, but there wasn't any helping that now. All she could do for now was to wait for death's door to open.
Zhang He found her by the river. She'd had her hand on her side and was sweating enough to shame swine. Zhang He dismounted and picked her up. He wasn't even holding her that close to him and he could feel her fever. Her body had done it's best to try to cope but it wasn't enough. She was almost drenched in her own sweat and still had a high fever. Grimacing slightly as her soaked body touching his, Zhang He put her over his horse.
Her clothes, as thick as they were, clung to her figure, showing every curve in her body and magnifying it. Even though Zhang He had seen this, he didn't pay any attention. Although women could be beautiful creatures and seemed to emit grace itself, they could also be trouble. Cao Cao often complained of his many wives and children behind them. If anything, they were better left alone.
Zhang He mounted his horse and turned it about. Lu Da-Xia stirred in her sleep as the horse started at a gallop back to Wei's camp. "Brother?" she murmured turning Zhang He and squinted as if she couldn't really make out who he was; then, she went limp again and fell back asleep as the horse picked up speed.
Man, I rewrite the first chapter and it's still short. Sorry, I know I'm an imbecile about such things a lot but I just can't do somethings without moving on to another chapter. Otherwise, it's just crap. Well, review because I'd always like to hear what you think. If you think there is another way that this thing can be improved I'd like to hear it. Even if you flame me, I won't get mad. Promise.