Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Harry Potter, the characters, or any elements except the story I've written and the designs I've made for the characters presented.
A/N: Keep in mind that this is all parody-based and just an excuse to have fun with these characters, and it will never change anything that Rowling has established. It will only exist on its own, as kind of a separate, parallel universe.
Chapter 1: Peter Pan
All of this is happening in the universe of my last story, Harry Potter and the Unauthorized Adaptation.
The date was July 18, 1992.
It was the summer after first year at Hogwarts. Harry, Ron, and Hermione were up in Harry's bedroom at the Potter house, along with Ron's brothers, Fred and George. Harry had introduced them to the joys of gaming on the Sega Genesis. Each of the boys took a turn at playing, as Harry had taught them. The game was titled, Hook, based on the Spielberg film of the same name. It may or may not have been out yet, but who cares. I'm not accurate about video games.
Anyways, Ron was having trouble comprehending the story.
"Let me get this right, Harry," Ron rambled. "This guy, Peter Banning, he's a guy who goes off to fight pirates to get his kids back, who only get taken from him because the hook-handed captain wants revenge, but the Peter bloke can't remember who the captain bloke is and he's taken to this strange island run by fairies and merpeople, which we all know will either get eaten by wild beasts or pull everyone else into the water and drown them."
Hermione put her book down, not believing that Ron could say that all in one breath.
"Have I got it right?" Ron asked.
"In a nutshell," Harry and Hermione replied in unison.
"Look at that, Georgie," Fred smirked.
"Yeah, imagine if they tried to beat our record for finishing each other's sentences," George added.
"Oh, shut up," Hermione giggled.
Harry looked at the newspaper on his desk. His parents always left the muggle newspaper there so he could find things to do in the summer. When he looked in the movies section, one ad caught his interest. He circled the ad in red.
"You know, Ron," the story of this game is… a sequel of sorts, to a children's story here in the muggle world," Hermione explained, sounding very articulate for a twelve year old.
"It's one of those 'fairy-tales', right?" Ron asked.
"Well, sort of," Hermione replied. "It started out as a play, then it was a novel, and then it was made into a film by a man called Walt Disney. But that's the version that most people think of."
"Is there anything you don't already know about?" Ron joked.
"It's called Peter Pan," Hermione finished. "Maybe if you saw the Disney film, you'd understand it."
Harry showed the paper to Hermione.
"Well, it's re-opening in town next week," Harry announced.
"Let's ask our parents about it," Hermione decided.
"I'll ask to my parents, too," Ron added. "It'll give Dad another muggle thing to do. I reckon if mum experiences it herself, she'll understand also."
Later that night, Harry and Hermione ran downstairs to show their parents the newspaper ad.
"Can we go?" Hermione asked.
"Of course," James replied
Both of the mothers were beyond excited.
"I haven't seen this since I was fourteen!" Lily exclaimed
"I've only ever seen it on television," exclaimed Jane, Hermione's mother.
"When can we go?" Harry asked.
"How about… opening day?" James suggested.
The kids raced back up to Harry's room, while James called the cinema. He'd made a reservation for seventeen people. This consisted of nine adults; Lily and James Potter, Paul and Jane Granger, Molly and Arthur Weasley, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and his girlfriend, "Don't Call Me" Nymphadora Tonks, along with eight children; Harry Potter, his sister, Sarah Potter, Hermione Granger, and Weasley siblings Ron, Fred, George, Ginny, and Percy. Lily and James wanted to make this as much of a family outing as they could and they were lucky to have gotten enough tickets.
Soon enough, the day came. It was Wednesday, July 22, 1992, the date that Walt Disney's Peter Pan had its second re release in the U.K. They headed out to see the film at the Plaza Cinema at 13 Crosby Road, North. It was simple in its architecture, but the brilliant neon lights made all the difference. James picked a nighttime screening to give the kids an old fashioned sense of going to the movies. Ron nearly forgot about the movie when the snack bar caught his eyes. Each of the kids would be given their own popcorn and their choice of drinks, plus an additional sweet. Ron was having so much trouble deciding on both the drink and extra sweet. For the extra sweet, he decided on something chocolatey, and as for the drink, he settled on Pepsi, finding the logo attractive.
When they sat down, Sirius didn't think the seats were particularly comfortable. He wanted to charm them, but he remembered he'd learned not to complain about long car rides. After eating just one piece of his popcorn, Ron was determined to devour it all. Soon enough the lights went down and the previews for coming attractions had begun. One of these previews was for another Disney film, titled, Beauty and the Beast. This wouldn't be out in the U.K. until October, but Hermione was barely able to contain her excitement for this film.
After a few more previews, the movie begun. It didn't take long for the movie to suck Ron in… kind of. The music had the right idea, but Ron couldn't understand the purpose of the opening credits or why there was singing over them. The parts centering on the Darling family gave him a bit of a laugh, especially when the kids tore apart carpets and bedsheets.
When Peter Pan brought the children to Neverland it got interesting. The pirates were what Ron anticipated in the film. The whole idea of carrying large weapons, i.e. swords and cannons, sounded more tempting than carrying a tiny little wand in his pocket. Being a boy, he was looking for something to raise his energy levels. Also, he wondered that if Goodrich Gryffindor could do it, why couldn't he?
He got some enjoyment out of the Indians, even though he didn't understand it. Being British and growing up in a pure blood house that was immersed in pure blood customs, he had never even heard of Native Americans.
But by far, the only thing that appealed to him as much as a sword, was flying without a broom. The idea that it could be done on such a grand luxurious ship, or even just all by yourself sounded tempting. If you did it yourself, you wouldn't have to worry quite as much about falling and breaking your neck.
By the time the movie was over and everyone was ready to leave, Mr. Weasley ran out the door bursting with questions. He just had to know how Muggles made pictures move, how projectors work, and so on and so forth. As much as Molly Weasley tried to placate her husband and shake her head, she had to admit that she enjoyed the experience as well. From then on, they both agreed that the Weasleys needed more family outings at the cinema.
Sirius sat through the film feeling like a kid in a candy store. If you know Sirius Black, he's pretty much just a Hogwarts kid in a grown man's body. But unlike Ron, there were parts of him that were tempted to question the logic behind the film. Then again, if he were a school kid in a man's body, he'd be known to do that.
Dora felt that she and Remus should keep going back to see these films until they got married and had kids. They figured by that point, if it were engrossed in them long enough, they'd be able to enjoy it with their own children.
The Potter and Granger parents got their usual enjoyment out of seeing the film, and Sarah, of course, had as much fun as the other kids who hadn't done this before. Except for Percy, who was disappointed he couldn't bury his face in his rulebooks.
Ron noticed on the poster for the film, there was a little stub of text, which said, Visit the new EuroDisney Resort in Paris. When Hermione read it, this gave her something else in Paris to dream of visiting.
If any of this surprises you, I think it's because you'd expect someone like Ron Weasley to nitpick at the logic behind Muggle stuff. In the other timeline, he'd ask questions like,
"How do the pictures move without magic?"
"Why do some of the people look all round and silly?"
And most importantly…
"How can muggles find sitting in front of a giant screen just watching pictures move to be much fun?"
Remember, in my story, Ron inherits his father's enthusiasm for Muggle stuff. Why? Because it's my story and I can do whatever the goddamn hell I want with it.
But still, Ron fell in love with this movie because it gave him the background behind Hook. But after remembering how that story went, he couldn't help but wonder…
"Why the bloody hell would Peter want to grow up and leave a place like Neverland if it's just to have kids?"