AN: WOooooOOow.I wrote this when I was so sleepy and my friend dared me to post it without looking it over. I don't remember what I said or even exactly what it's about, just that it was really hard to type and feel like I was making sense. She also challenged me to not backspace over words I misspelled, so this should be fun for anyone who has followed my other work and wants to see my writing in the truest form. If this is your first time reading something of mine, I'm very sorry, but I hope you have a good laugh with me and I would encourage you to check out something better of mine if you have the time and interest. I might rewrite this properly in the future, but for now enjoy my candid first draft. I haven't read it yet, but know I wrote it in complete seriousness (even though I was laughing the entire time) and I did not put much thought into my spelling or sentence structure. Enjoy.
They had loved eacj othr for years. But love is a complicatd thing.
Gilbrt loved Elizavbeta. He loved er as his best friend. They were freins dince the beignning., even when they were rivals, they cared deeply for each other. But elisabeat couldn't stay by his sdie having fun forever. She couldn't pretend to be someone else for er whole life. But was this really who she ws? Gilbert didn't kow. He didnt knw if she still wantd to be his friend even after she left him. He didn't know if she still cared for him, but he ws sure she didn't feel te same tway he did.
Gilbert never stoopped lovin her as afriend. And he thoght yars leater, that she became more to im. She became much more, even though she left her old self behind. He doens't tell naywaone, tho. He doesn;t even admit is to himself. He tells himself he's fine alone, that hes happy. He doesnt ned other people. He's too awesome, too strogn for that, if he feels alone it must be strange. He's not lonely. He deosnt need anyone. And his friend has the love of her life to take care of her, so she doenst need nayone etiher.
Is she lonely? Is she happy? Does she love him? Giblert doesn't know. Btu he knows he cnat change anything.
Gilbert loved Roderich, didn;t he? No. suely he did not love the one who wanted to take his bst friend awya forever. Excpet, he did. He laughed at him, he made fun and tried to humiliate him, becuse he aws bitter. But there was more to it than that. When he realized he couldnt' fight his feeligns there ws no denyhng it. He lcouldnt deny his attarction, he couldnt den y anythingm, no matter nhow hard he tried. And this is how he knw he wuold always feel. Because the two he loved were in love witheach other. And they were happy. Adn they hanted him. Both of them were better of iwthout him. Besides, he never wanted a ilife commitment. And they did. They were perfct fro ecah other. And he ws supposed to be alneo.
Elizaveta gwrew up never knowing who she was. Prusai was her friend, but she was not like him. She didnt know why, but eventualy it was he who ehlped her realize she wasnt who sh'ed always thought. But when she knew, could she still be hisf riend? She didnt know who she was. Not until she fell in love again. She met roderich, and he was sof different form Gilbet. He was so different, and he took good care of hr, and she aawas always able to protect him. Elizaveata loved Rodercih. They both seemed ot be wht the other needed. And she qas happy.
But Elizabeta couldn't forget who she was. When she looked in the mirror, and saw herself in those dresses he boght fo her, she didn't feel like herself… she knew she was made for more. She was born to fight, and now, what was she doing with ehrself? She had forgotten a huge part of herself. And she missed him. She loved PrgIlbert. Even as she loved her husnand, she loved Gilbert. Her first friend, her enemy, her true slef. That part that used to mean she would aloways be alones.
Rodercih loved Elizabeta. They eseemd so right for each other. She was alsways ready to fight for im, and he cared ofr her deeply. He loved the persn she became a s she found hrself, but he always felt like she was logning to dsicover somethni go more. Maybe a part fo her still belonged to the one she had left behind when stehy marrved. He tfelt jealous at times, but he understood. He loved him to. He loves Gilbert. Andhe loves eLizabeat. And even still he felt so alone.
Rodeich may have fond deliverance with Eliasbeat. Maybe they both lived happily wayay from gilbert. And it seemed like they didn't miss him or want him. But when roderich examined he s feelings, he knew he could not deny the steadiky burning flame for gilbert htat resided n his heart. And when he saw his wife, and he saw them fighting as all three of them often did, he knew she felt it too. Did he know/? Did he feel it too, as they did? Were they what they thought they couldnever be to each other?
Did they know ever how not alone they really were? Could they imagine what they really meant to ech other? These best friend,s tehse enemies, and bitter former lvores, who could say what they ereally felt? Not they. But they felt it. And each othef them knew only thir part. But wha eall of hem knew was thsi.
Love was a complicated thing. But love was what they would always have for each other.