DISCLAIMER: Harry Potter belongs to JK Rowling.
~ I Would Not Have Went To Me ~
"What is that godawful racket?" Remus asked as he entered the apartment he shared with his two friends.
"What racket?" Peter asked nervously.
Remus just stared at him. Surely he must be hearing it as well.
"Oh, that?" Peter made a vague hand gesture to indicate the screeching noises pervading the air. "That's Sirius trying to teach himself how to play the violin."
"SIRIUS!" Remus shouted, loudly enough that he was sure the other man would be able to hear him even over the cacophony of tortured strings. "Why are you trying to teach yourself how to play the violin?"
The screeching noises came to an abrupt halt, and a moment later Sirius appeared in the doorway with the violin and its bow dangling casually from his hands.
"I heard this amazing song on the muggle radio," he explained. "It was just so... there's no way to describe how incredible it was! So I decided to learn how to play it!"
And with that, he disappeared back into his bedroom. Remus and Peter both cringed as the screeching noises started up again.
"What should we do about...?" the rat asked, letting his sentence trail off into a jerky shoulder movement which Remus took to mean the "music".
"Hope he gets better at it quickly?" the werewolf suggested unhelpfully.
"Should we maybe get him to go to actual music lessons or something? I mean... how can he teach himself to play it when he's trying to learn because he doesn't know how to play it? Wouldn't it be better to learn from an actual teacher?"
"Well," Remus said. "I'll let you be the one to go and convince him of that, while I send an emergency request for sanctuary to James and Lily by Patronus. Because I don't think we'll all three make it through the day alive if Sirius keeps this up."
~end~
A/N: The song Sirius was trying to play is "The Devil Went Down To Georgia" by the Charlie Daniels Band.
The fic title and part of Peter's dialogue are based on one of Mitch Hedberg's jokes. ("I tried to teach myself how to play guitar but I was a shitty teacher because I did not know how to play it. I would not have went to me.")