Regrets.
A/N: Finally got the courage to write my first Fanficion. I have kept it short and simple, just to be on the safe side. And I hope I did not do too badly.
Sybil couldn't fall asleep that night, and she had a good idea why. Surprisingly, very little of it involved her being homesick, in fact, she was sure that her restlessness was because of one particular person. And, that person was Branson. Lying in bed hours after his confession, her guilt started eating away at her. Guilt over turning him down, guilt over not being strong enough to listen to her heart.
Because, she was quite sure that her heart agreed with everything Branson had said. She just hadn't been strong enough to admit the truth, to confess her real feelings for him. And, oh, how very real they were. It had started off as an infatuation – as most loves did. She was intrigued with him and his love for all things political, but she knew it could go no further, as it would have complicated both of their lives greatly. After the hand holding incident at the Garden party, her infatuation had evolved into something more; something stronger. And while she could no longer deny the way she felt about him, she couldn't bring herself to tell him, either.
She knew that everything would change if she had confessed her feelings for him, so she buried them; knowing that their lives would be much easier. Although, it had been extremely hard to be around him so often, and to not be able to open up to him, especially since she knew he had feelings for her too. That much was evident at the Garden Party. She supposed that he was keeping quiet for the same reasons she was - although he disapproved of the boundaries between social classes, he had enough sense to respect his boss' daughter, knowing that he would put her in a hard position, if he had told her how he felt about her.
Which is why she can't understand why he chose to confess his feelings when he did. No more than why she can't understand why exactly she had still kept quiet about hers. She knew that the War had turned all their lives upside down and there really was no such thing as normality anymore. Now that she thinks about it, maybe it is the right time for her and Branson to confess their feelings to one another. Like he had said, things were changing and once the War was over their social differences would not matter anymore. But what if they did? Would she be brave enough to turn against everything she had been brought up to be? Would she be able to stand being disowned by her family? She hopes that it would not come to that, but she could never be sure of it.
However, she cannot stand the thought of marrying some man she does not love, some man that would make her family happy, but not her; never her. She doesn't want to wake up in twenty years time regretting the choices she had made. She wants to marry a man that she loves with all her heart, a man that would devote every waking minute to her happiness, a man that would inspire and encourage her to pursue her dreams; whether they be political or not. She knows that all of that is worth a lot more than money or status; she knows that, that is why she should have said yes to him, that is why she should have expressed her love for him. And, all of that is why she cannot sleep. Especially when she thinks of the look on his face after she had turned him down. That look more than anything, makes her regret walking away from him without telling him how she felt.
If only she could turn back time…
A/N 2: Doesn't Branson just break your heart? I really hope things look up for them as Series 2 goes on. Thank you to everyone who read my first attempt at Fanficion, reviews are much appreciated. =)