Hello, all! I re-read this series twice and liked it immensely both times. So I decided- why not?- to write something about it. Thanks for reading, and I hope I don't make you people hate this series (or me)! (Be warned: I'm cliché. I'm sorry, but I always start out cliché).
Disclaimer: No. Just... no. Artemis Fowl was always too awesome.
"Number One... What is this?"
"What is what, Arty?"
Artemis Fowl the Second rubbed the bridge of his nose wearily- or rather, attempted to.
"I don't think I need to explain, Number One."
"I think you do, Arty."
Artemis Fowl sighed. "If this is a so-called attempt to make me relax, it is not working."
"Oh, no." Number One said, shaking his head. "I think you misunderstand. This wasn't an attempt to make you relax at all."
"Number One, lying will not work against me. I thought you had realized that by now."
Number One smiled as he watched the pale but thoroughly annoyed face of Artemis stare back at him expressionlessly. As always, Artemis was Artemis. There was no point in playing games with him... Then he wordlessly slid the door shut. Butler's going to kill me when he learns about the specifics of this plan...
In the dark, Artemis sighed. It had all been going well. He'd made progress on his newest project- he'd even stayed up for hours in the night for the past few weeks. But then he had woken up in his bedroom in time to see the wide grin of Holly Short before he had blacked out. And then...this was what he had come back to conscience to. He suspected that Butler was involved since his loyal servant hadn't rescued him yet.
The pains of having 'friends' who 'were only looking out for your best interests' were endless. But even as he stared at the dark and small interior of his temporary prison with a frown, his eyes twinkled in amusement. This was the first time he'd had any contact with the People in a year. Of course it had to be dramatic.
Granted, it wasn't probably saving-the-world dramatic, but as dramatic as it got when a former evil genius meets up with a warlock, a fugitive, a centaur, and a former captain of the L.E.P., even Artemis couldn't have predicted what was about to take place.