«Obsession»
Everything belongs to Sui Ishida.
Summary:
Eto moans with pleasure at knowing that both are equal, that it doesn't matter how much he pretends to hate her he always returns to her arms at the end of the day when desolation overwhelms him and he knows that the only person waiting for him in the shadows is the one-eyed king. She, the capricious queen. He, the masochistic vassal.
A/N: I recommend you all to listen to the fanfic playlist I made (which you can find in my tumblr, ladywongs) to get a more immersive experience.
"This place looks so nasty as you."
When Kaneki undoes his red glove—the crimson leather sliding through his soft fingers like a tear of blood—and falls onto a deaf ground impregnated with an ancient and nameless dust, Eto knows she's safe.
Her breathing is quiet though her heart throbs with the asthma of an old saxophone. It's like a sign, a hint that she can allow herself to let her guard down. When the red glove falls undressing the skin of his hand she knows Kaneki has gave in again, that his mind debates a million possibilities but Eto knows him too well to even doubt, he's here for a reason and so is she and none of them is going to walk away trough that door after having come this far. When you bite the apple you can't just spit out the piece out of your mouth. It's a game of two, a mischievous one of which both feel the owners and bit by bit it turns out to be a habit, a pleasurable and bloody routine. Who can hurt each other with more intensity? Who can hate with madness until bones break and you hear screams from above? Who can destroy—no, love—with enough insanity to become two tragic heroes? They already were.
Let us make a thousand mistakes, we'll never learn.
But usually, Eto is the one to start first. Her cunning eyes travel through his features with joviality, barefoot getting dirty with the dust whilst she approaches him, completely naked, and when she comes to her destiny her hands gently remove the glasses he's wearing all the time, throwing those in the ground with a hint of superiority. They look like Arima, she thinks, and he's not Arima at all… that investigator can't be even compared with the greatness clinging on Kaneki's lips, his rotten soul that Eto only wants to rebuild to destroy over, and over, and over again. A God molding his perfect masterpiece, a son worshiping his creator above all things.
But Eto doesn't smile. Her mischievous eyes hide something else within them, an unseen worship that she doesn't bother to hide and Kaneki doesn't get it, he can't understand the reason behind his foot creeping into this shadowy room inside an abandoned building. Eto leans her hand against his cheek and her fingers slide through his messy hair, so dark as onyx, bustling like her accelerated heartbeats. Her touch gives him chills, how can something so cruel as ruthless hold such tenderness?
Eto does not wait for him to touch her first, so impatient and childish she is. She envelops her hands around his neck and the warm breath mint caress the sensitive spot on his collarbone—there were blood flows whimsical—and her little hands ruffles his hair over and over again, whilst he hears her sobbing like the crazy bitch she's always been.
"Kaneki…" She repeats over and over spreading soft kisses around his neck, her hands fondling his entire body at the point it looks sickly and feels annoying. "You're so beautiful, Kaneki… oh, I've missed you so much, so much…"
Eto leans back and their lips are just a few millimeters to join as one, but she holds his face, and fuels him, and the adoration in her eyes disturbs him, because she's a true monster and still she looks beautiful, a demon disguised as an angel that smiles softly. Under the dim her breath whips his lips and Eto leans forward to finally kiss him, impatient, but Kaneki departs his face to one side with the gaze glued on the ground and then he realizes he made a terrible mistake. It was a rule, a fact too dangerous to be forgotten…
No one despises Eto.
During an instant her skin freezes, she doesn't feel warm against his skin anymore but Eto ignores her feelings and she takes advantage of the angle to rest her lips upon his chin, his male jaw that provokes in her shaking chills of pleasure through all her body.
"What's wrong?" She asks, so warm as the sun from which Kaneki lives hiding. "Are you sad?"
Eto knows she won't get an answer so easily, her graceful fingers holds on his cheek and she obliges him to look at her, to confront her eager smile. Eto bends her lips against his but she doesn't kiss him at all, not yet. Her tongue caress slowly his lower lip and tiny little kisses are spread all over his chin, his eyes, the tip of his nose, not a single spot of his face can escape from her lips.
"Don't be sad," she says, milder voice and bitter words. "I'm right here, I will take care of you, I'll always take care of you…"
Take care of him? Kaneki's eyes fall shut and laughs bitterly, that makes Eto smile brightly. She looks unreachable with her parted lips, purplish by the cold of a kiss that doesn't come, ruddy by one thousand minus seven bites non-marking—and they don't heal. White—when the lies slide and break through them. Her bare chest, poorly covered by some bandages try to rub his, increase a more deep contact that till now, Kaneki didn't show any interest in allow, and that drives her crazy. In some bizarre way, Kaneki is enjoying this.
"Come on, kiss me, kiss me…"
Kaneki holds both her wrists firmly, departing them away from his face.
"Why should I?"
The spark in Eto's eyes does not go unnoticed for him. Without even noticing it—because he's still weak, he thinks he's too smart but he's extremely naïve, a pawn acting like a queen, a servant with a prince's eyes—Eto slides her tongue through the dagger blade she's going to use to hurt him and, unfortunately, she knows exactly where his weak point is. And it does not reside in his chaotic mind.
It's in his heart.
"Because I love you," and she smiles, his perverse eyes disappear and Eto knows she hit the spot. "That's what you want, isn't? Be loved. And I love you, my sweet Kaneki, I love you so much."
Bit by bit the grip of his hands on her wrists fades away and Eto takes advantage of his eternal weakness to bend her face down and kiss his closed eyelids, her lips caressing his skin while her hands hold his cheeks and even if Kaneki doesn't touch her, Eto knows he had fallen into the trap. He's broken and needy and he keeps disintegrating when Eto keeps on talking, a consolation that seems more like a torture and his scars bleed all over again.
I love you, you're so beautiful, I adore you, I'm not going to leave you, I'll never leave you…
He keeps frowning his eyebrows and his hands become fists, rabid. "You have no idea how much I would like to kill you right now."
Eto laughs, both arms clinging around his neck childishly and she tilts her face to one side, tiny little flecks of green hair infiltrating through her eyelashes.
"Kill me? You can't kill me. I'm the only person who loves you. If you kill me… who would love you then?"
Kaneki scoffs, irritated, and pushes her away so Eto staggers back, but she doesn't look upset at all, the devil loves to entertain himself with other people's suffering but Kaneki still doesn't quite understand. Eto is also God, is the God that sustains him before his own demon sends him right to a sea of fire and brimstone. She creates a wound that then she strives to cure with the most delicate attentions.
"Who would love you?" She asks again, walking towards him, the bandages that cover the lower part of her body sliding through the soil in the process. "Kirishima-san?"
Then she sees it. She can see the surprise due a forbidden name and fury takes possession of Eto. Kaneki is hers, his vulnerability belongs to her and no one else should have it. Especially her.
Cruelness streams out of her eyes like acid tears.
"She can't have you," she says, and soon her words become a bittersweet warning. "I wonder… how would she look in my kagune? I've always wanted to have wings…"
Eto can't even finish her sentence when the painful hand of Kaneki travels to her chin with a sudden fury, nails sinking into her pale skin whilst his eyes contemplate her with disgust, his lips frowned because of the trash Eto represents to him, the spark in Eto's eyes shimmer and though she laughs, she can't help but hate him a bit. His hand prevents her from making any move and Eto holds his wrists with her fingers.
Good. This is the Kaneki she fell in love with.
"Do you really think she loves you?" She spits, as cruel as she can be. "During all this time she knew where you were and still did nothing for you at all. You're a pet in Arima's hands, a prey in Tsukiyama's tongue, a stupid quinque with legs. Not even your mother knew how to love you properly."
"Shut up!" Kaneki screams, shivering, his new personality threatening him with destroying her and Eto smiles again when she feels the blood sliding through her cheeks because of his aggressive grip, his hands are rammed in her hair and his nails scratch the soft skin of her neck and Eto can't breathe.
But she won't stop.
"Do you really think anyone can love you, Kaneki? You are not unrepeatable, necessary, indispensable…"
"I said shut up!"
"Even if you die tomorrow, no one will ever—"
The grip on her hair intensifies and Eto can't even finish her sentence when Kaneki's furious mouth lashes against hers. He doesn't even close his eyes, his crimson eye shimmering shamelessly just like hers, defeating her with his sight and Eto moans with pleasure at knowing that both are equal, that it doesn't matter how much he pretends to hate her he always returns to her arms at the end of the day when desolation overwhelms him and he knows that the only person waiting for him in the shadows is the one-eyed king, like an absurd slave he bends his knees to his queen. He takes Eto within his arms and her back crashes against the nearest wall, broken and brittle, but Eto whimpers against his mouth and her body melts, while he gets rid off his clothes and there is no space left for giggles or mockery clinging on top of their fingers.
"I love you, let me love you," she insists, uncontrolled, blind, lost. "I'll take care of you, you still have me, I'll take care of you…"
Kaneki Ken is her obsession. Her fetish and religion, the confusion and confession, the one she wants tonight. Kaneki Ken is her obsession, the question, and conclusion.
She, the capricious queen. He, the masochistic vassal.
This ship is my life.
Thank you all for reading!
—Mel.