WARNING: This is only meant for the real Nick x Ellis fans out there-including me! You don't like it? TURN BACK NOW!
SPECIAL SHOUT-OUT: Just wanted to thank my wonderful fiance for this idea-and thank you for letting me act it out a bit, however funny it was!
DISCLAIMER: Valve owns these wonderful boys, not I. But I do however, own this story. So...bite me!
"Ellis, what are you doing?"
"Starin'."
"At what?"
"You-know-what."
"Um, no. I don't."
"Oh, yes. You do."
"No, I don't."
"Well, then look!"
Nick looks and sighs, annoyed. "Oh, really, Ellis?"
"Yup!"
"Are you serious?"
"Yup!"
"Pervert."
Ellis chuckles.
"Stop it."
"No."
"Why are you so fascinated by it?"
"I dunno…I jus' like it."
"Well, your creeping me out."
"Ain't gonna stop me from lookin' at it!"
"I'm gonna cover it up." Covers it with his hand.
"Hey! Nick, not fair!"
"What? You actually like it?"
"Yeah!"
"Why?"
"You wanna know?"
"Isn't that what I just asked?"
"You really wanna know?" Ellis drawls, seductively.
Nick sighed again. Was he really going down that route? "Enlighten me."
"Well, for one it's loooonngg…"
"…"
"And smooootthh…"
"…"
"And the head is really biiiig…"
"…"
"And it fits perfectly in my hand as I stroke it—"
Nick slaps his hand away. "Okay, stop it. Now your really beginning to creep me out."
"Oh, c'mon Nick…" Ellis purrs in his ear.
"I'm warning you, El."
"Let me touch it," he whines as he reaches out. "I promise to be gentle."
Nick slaps his hand away, again. "Stop it."
"Please?"
"No."
"But it's soooo biiiig!"
"I got the idea the first time, but no! Your not touching it."
"Niiiick!" Another whine.
"Dammit, Ellis—for the last time, no!"
"I jus' wanna touch it—"
"No."
"And stroke it—"
"No."
"And massage it—"
"Stop it!" Nick slaps his hand away again and covers it, keeping his hand there.
"Nick!"
"Your acting like a child, now stop it!"
"Oh, c'mon!"
Nick's grumbles. "Now I gotta clean it because it has your germs all over it."
"Jus' let me touch it!"
"For the last time, no."
"I promise I won't break it!"
"Oh, now that's reassuring."
"So…you'll let me touch it?"
"No."
"Nick?"
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
"Jus' one more time?"
"No?"
"Please?"
"No…"
"Purdy please?"
"El, stop it…"
"Purdy please with a cherry on top?"
"For the last time," Nick growls. "No!"
Ellis crosses his arms over his chest, looking away from him. "Tch. Fine."
"Good."
"I'm mad at you now."
"So?"
"Soooo, I'm not gonna talk to you for awhile."
Nick shrugs. "Fine by me."
"And I'm gonna sleep in the guestroom tonight."
"More room for me."
"And I won't join you in the shower in the mornin'."
"More time for me to linger and actually take a shower for once without you crowding me."
"Ouch."
"Yup."
"You don't mean that."
"I do."
"No, you don't."
"What makes you so sure?"
"You always enjoy takin' a shower with me."
Nick snorts. "You got it backwards, kiddo."
Ellis makes an incredulous noise. "'Scuse me?"
"You heard me."
"Your jokin', right?"
"About you crowding me or enjoying your company as I try to wash the dirt away?"
Ellis huffs. "Never once heard you complain."
"Hard to when your such a distraction and make me late to work."
"I'll keep that in mind."
"And didn't you say you weren't gonna be talking to me?"
"…"
"Better make due with that statement, champ."
"…"
Nick smiles. "Just what I like. Peace and quiet."
"…"
Silence continues as Ellis still won't look at him, arms remaining crossed on his chest. He sniffles.
Nick raises an eyebrow at the sound. "Ellis?"
"…"
"El?"
Another sniffle.
"You crying?"
"…"
Nick sighs. "Talk to me."
"…"
He reaches out to touch him, only to have Ellis shrug him off. "Dammit, talk to me."
"…"
"You really that mad at me?"
"…"
"You know I was only joking, right? About you crowding me?"
Sniffle.
"And about not enjoying your company?"
"…"
"Is this about me not letting you…touch it?"
Another sniffle, followed by a cough, then a sniffle.
"It is, isn't it?"
"…"
"Your not gonna talk to me and stick to all that you said until I let you do it?"
"…"
Nick looks over at him. "Really?"
"…"
"Ellis?"
"…"
"El?"
"…"
"Overalls?"
"…"
"Champ?"
"…"
"Fireball?"
"…"
"Kiddo?"
"…"
Nick holds his breath for a moment.
"…" Sniffle, followed by a harsh cough.
Nick lets it out and laughs, unable to control himself. "Snot?"
Ellis turns to him quickly and hits him hard in the shoulder before looking away again.
"Ow, hey!" Rubs his shoulder in disbelief. "Ellis, dammit. Talk to me!"
A grunt.
"Will you stop with this childish act and just talk to me?"
"…"
Nick sighs with a growl, clearly not winning. "Fine, fine. Touch it."
"…"
"Touch it."
"…"
"Dammit, I said touch it!"
Ellis shakes his head.
Nick huffs. "…your gonna make me beg, aren't you?"
"…"
"Your gonna make me beg as you continue to give me the silent treatment."
"…"
Nick leans in towards him. "What if I touched it? Would that please you?"
"…"
Nick sighs and grabs onto it, leaning in to purr in Ellis's ear—not believing that he's actually doing it. "Oh yeah, El. Your right…it is biiiig."
"…"
"And smooooth."
"…"
"And it fits perfectly in my hand—"
"As you stroke it?" Ellis purrs back as he turns to him with a seductive smile, placing his hand over Nick's and leaning in.
Nick returns it with a lopsided smile. "Mind if I massage it?"
"In front of me?" Ellis raises an eyebrow in wonder. "Gladly."
Nick grabs onto the back of Ellis's head and smashes their lips together, making the younger moan in pleasure as Nick continues to stroke—
—then makes him yelp out in surprise when he grabs a fistful of curls and yanks his head back with a sharp tug.
"The next time I change the gear shifter in my car…don't look at it or even touch it. Got it?"
Ellis nods, despite the pain.
"Good." Nick lets him go and turns on the car. "Now, let's get you to the dentist."