In celebration of 'Tori Fixes Beck and Jade'.
...
When people ask why you and Jade aretogether, you laugh.
You know what they're asking. Why her? Why suffer Jade (jealous, clingy, bossy Jade), when you can have someone like Tori?
Pretty Tori, popular Tori, adorable Tori, sweet, safe, perfect Tori.
(Tori, Tori, Tori, Tori).
Tori wouldn't yell, they say. Tori wouldn't get jealous. Tori wouldn't question everything you say. Tori wouldn't nag and complain and argue, until you're ready to scream.
Tori would give you space, agree with you on most things, and negotiate on others. She'd back away when needed, laugh at your jokes and charm her way into your family. (Because she's just loveable like that).
Tori is the right choice, they say. (And they are right).
...
There's just one problem.
You don't want Tori. Or anyone like Tori.
You want (need) someone – Who needs you.
What's the point of a relationship, you ask. If one half is fricking perfect already? When all they need is a pretty boy to hang onto?
You don't want some prize to show off. You want someone who makes you whole, and who you make whole back. You need someone broken, because dammit you are too. (And only broken pieces make a whole).
...
Jade is broken.
She tells you so. About her parent's divorce. About her alcoholic, stoner mother. (She wasn't surprised by the arrest). About her aloof, distant Dad. (He didn't care until she became his 'problem'). About parents so far apart, she's tearing down the middle. She tells you, and you listen.
And you talk too, you tell her about your parents. About your Dad and his distance. Your mum and her criticism. About never-ever-ever-ever being good enough. Verbal and emotional abuse round and round. The expectations that suffocated you, until you moved out (Jade's idea) and breathed again.
She understands that. (Oh god she does).
It's a give and take process. Like everything in your relationship.
...
How could you have that with Tori?
Tori, is already complete. She couldn't take your jagged edges. (She's never been hurt in her life). Flawless Tori, who is unblemished to the core, couldn't deal with you and your scars.
You couldn't talk to her. Not properly. She sees the surface you. The calm, chilled Beck, who loves everyone, and everyone loves in return.
Fraud, your mind whispers. Hypocrite.
(Of course she wouldn't hear those whispers).
...
No one hears the whispers. No one wonders about the scarred wrists and tear tracks and tell-tale signs.
No one except Jade. Jade, with her knowing gaze and superior smirk. Jade, who hides her tears, behind a mask so different from yours it's unbelievable.
(Jade, Jade, Jade, Jade).
Yes, your jagged edges hurt. Yes, her edges grate at times. But...they dull each other as well. Like a jigsaw puzzle, that's pieces have to be worn away, before they fit together.
Beck&Jade. Jade&Beck.
...
Tori Vegamight be the right choice.
But Jade Westis the right choice for you.
And you know what?
Beck Oliver is completely ok with that.