The Downside of Power

Okay, I am following advice here people; so I'd appreciate that you didn't complain. This is based off of my 'The Downside of Power' one-shot/story challenge that is located within the Idea Tome. Now, this story is; for those who read the one-shot/challenge, is obviously a humor story. For those of you who don't know…Well, now you do.

I know I've said that when I'm not in a good mood, I can't write humor/happy stories; and that I tend to focus on the darker themed stories and whatnot. Well, the advice I got was 'Just do it. Who knows? Maybe something will change.' So, here I am. If this works, and I hope that it does; maybe Kitty and other humor stories will follow?

So, for the most part, this chapter is essentially a Copy-and-Paste of my one-shot/challenge chapter.

The Downside of Power

Sarutobi Hiruzen sighed as his favorite blonde haired person shoved a paper in his face. He closed his eyes and barely refrained from pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. Opening his old, tired eyes; the Sandaime Hokage looked at the paper. He couldn't help but smile…Inwardly. Outwardly, he frowned.

On the other side of the paper was Uzumaki Naruto, Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi no Kitsune, a broad smile painted on his face; his own ocean blue eyes closed as he held the paper in his face.

"Naruto-Kun," Hiruzen began calmly; "why are you here? It's not Tuesday." The blonde didn't move as he opened his mouth.

"I drew you a picture, Jiji!" he gleefully explained. "I wanted to show you!"

"I can see that you drew a picture, Naruto-Kun." Hiruzen stated. "But it's Saturday, and Saturdays are one of the busiest days of my work week. Tuesdays are the days we spend together."

"But I wanted to show you today…" the blonde whined, his smile disappearing slightly, cracking his eyes open slightly, pouting. "…You don't like it?" Hiruzen sighed and shook his head.

"I like it, Naruto-Kun…I always like the pictures you draw for me." The blonde's face perked up, a happy, embarrassed blush quickly highlighting his cheeks. "But Saturdays are work days. Tuesdays are the day that we get to play, remember?" The blonde pouted again but nodded slowly. "Where's Ebisu?"

"…I don't know…" The blonde said with a pause. Hiruzen sighed again.

"What did you do to him today, Naruto?" Naruto flinched slightly. He knew that when Hiruzen used his name without a suffix, he wasn't joking or playing around. Just as Naruto began to open his mouth and explain what had happened to his guardian, the doors to his office flew opened violently and the man in question stomped towards them.

"Hokage-Sama!" The man growled as he marched. "Tha-Tha-That THING, owes me a new pair of sunglasses!" his right hand stretched out at Naruto, index finger pointed directly at his tanned, whiskered face.

"What happened now, Ebisu?" Hiruzen deadpanned. The younger man took a deep breath before answering the question.

"Naruto wanted to go outside to play today…" he began; "as we were heading towards the park so he could swing on the swings, we passed a small family owned shop. In the window was a large pack of crayons…180 to be precise." Hiruzen nodded, casting a glance at the tanned skinned blonde who was puckering his lips and looking off to the left, blatantly thinking up some sort of lie no doubt. He turned his attention back to the rambling man who was supposed to be watching the blonde. "He asked if we could go and buy them; and when I said no, he started to throw a fit. I told him that if he continued to act like a six year old, that we wouldn't go for ramen for lunch. As we continued towards the park, I noticed something was off."

"He made a clone, left it with you and stole the crayons…Correct?" Hiruzen asked. Ebisu nodded dumbly. "I'm guessing that you chased after him and he got away…" he pointed at the picture in Naruto's hands and Ebisu blushed brightly, thoroughly embarrassed. "So, tell me something, Ebisu…" the normally shaded man blinked at Hiruzen before gulping. "What happened to your sunglasses?"

"…" the man took several moments to calm down before beginning again. He looked down at the floor and muttered something.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't hear that." Hiruzen stated calmly. The younger man looked up and glared at the tanned blonde who was still thinking about some sort of lie to tell him.

"…He…He dropped them in a backed up toilet…" Out of the corner of his eyes, Hiruzen could clearly see the blonde to his left scrunch his face up as he snickered.

"…Fine." Hiruzen stated tiredly. "Put it on my tab…" Ebisu looked at Hiruzen stunned.

"Any pair?" he asked. Hiruzen narrowed his eyes.

"If I find out that you bought the most expensive pair you can find, I personally will drop them into a backed up toilet and then force you to wear them. Got it?" the younger man nodded quickly. "You can leave, Ebisu."

"B-But what about him?" the Tokubetsu Jounin asked dumbly, pointing at Naruto. The aged Hokage leaned forward onto his desk and pushed the 'Talk' button on his intercom.

"Yes, Hokage-Sama?" came the voice of the secretary downstairs.

"Have someone go and collect Inuzuka Hana for me." Hiruzen ordered.

"As you wish, Hokage-Sama." the secretary replied before ending the conversation with a mechanical beep.

"Take the next couple of days off, Ebisu." Hiruzen commanded. "Hana will be able to entertain Naruto. You just worry about coming up with new games to play with Naruto…and new routes to get to the park." The younger man blushed heavily, but nodded and bowed respectfully. "You are dismissed, Ebisu." The younger man bowed even deeper before standing up and racing out of Hiruzen's office. Turning to face the grinning blonde, he sighed yet again. "What am I going to do with you, Naruto-Kun?"

"Missions!" the blonde chirped happily.

"No." Hiruzen replied immediately, causing the blonde to sulk, his lower lip quivering. "Why did you drop Ebisu's sunglasses into a toilet?"

"'Cause," the blonde began, still sulking; "he was being mean…" Hiruzen dropped his head and shook it tiredly.

"I need to retire." He said softly.

"Ooh! OOH!" Naruto shouted, jumping up and down, raising his hand excitedly. "Can I be Hokage?"

"No."

"What? Why not?" the blonde demanded.

"Because, Naruto; a Hokage needs to be someone strong-"

"But I am strong!" the blonde interrupted.

"The Hokage also needs to be able to lead the village in times of hardships."

"I can do that!" Naruto declared.

"And, the Hokage can't be insane."

"I'm not insane!" the blonde shouted. "I'm just crazy!" Hiruzen rolled his eyes.

"Being crazy, Naruto, is the exact same thing as being insane." Hiruzen stated. Naruto looked offended.

"Who the hell said I was crazy?" the blonde asked angrily. Again, Hiruzen rolled his eyes. He was about to open his mouth, when the door to his office opened, and Team 8 entered the room.

"Good afternoon, Hokage-Sama." Yuuhi Kurenai greeted as she and her team bowed to the elderly leader respectfully. "We've come to see if there are any more D-Ranked missions available." She and her students stood up straight and waited for the response. Or, would have, had Naruto not jumped over and squatted down in front of Kiba and glared directly into his eyes.

"…So…" he began, his tone low and threatening. "You're the one who's been going around town and telling everyone I'm crazy…"

"What?" Kiba asked, easily intimidated by Naruto. Naruto's hand snaked out and grabbed the puppy on top of his head and then stood up to his full height of 5'8" and glared directly into the puppy's eyes. "Hey! What are you doing to Akamaru!"

"…I'm going to kill you…Slowly…And epically!" He dropped the puppy before jumping back from the Genin team and their sensei and struck an overly dramatic Kung-Fu pose. Kiba, having already been in motion to save his partner from the insane wack-a-doo; caught his puppy and held him close to his chest. "Wu-AAA!"

"Sensei!" Kiba screeched as Naruto leapt forward, bracing himself for impact...

"Hello Naruto-Kun."

…And then opened his eyes once as soon as the new voice filled the room. "Nee-San?" The wild boy didn't see the insane blonde lunging at him anymore. Turning around, he found his older sister gently patting the head of the scary insane blonde man as she would to a puppy who wanted to play. "Nani?"

"Hana-Chan!" Naruto barked out. "Hana-Chan! You're here! Let's play!"

"Okay! Okay!" the brown haired teenager agreed. "But first, what's this I hear about you being mean to Ebisu-San?"

"…He was being mean…" The blonde man replied.

"How so?" Hana asked.

"He wouldn't let me buy any crayons…" Hana stared at him, as did Kurenai and her team, all wondering just how insane the blonde man really was. "So, I stole them!"

"That's not nice, Naruto!" Hana scolded the blonde, who instantly dropped to the floor and hid his head under his arms, making whimpering sounds and shook with fear. "Not to mention illegal!"

"…" the blonde shook even harder. Hana sighed.

"I can't hear you…" the blonde took his left arm off of his head and repeated his earlier comment. "…Well then, that's where we're going first. Come on…" She waited for the blonde lump to move, but when he didn't, she sighed. "Then we can go get some ramen…" in an instant, the blonde was up and on his feet, drooling as he smiled.

"Can I-" he began, but Hana cut him off.

"No, Naruto-Kun; you cannot put any candy in your ramen…" the blonde slumped as the rest of the room's occupants struggled not to puke.

"…Fine…" with that, Hana led the blonde out of the room. Turning back, she looked at the Hokage and rolled her eyes at him, earning a return eye roll from the elderly man. As soon as the door was shut, Kurenai turned to look at her commander and opened her mouth.

"Who the hell was that psycho?" Kiba asked for her.

"That," Hiruzen began slowly; "was the strongest shinobi in our village…"

"…What are you smoking and where can I find some?" Kiba asked, shocking his team. "That guy is the strongest person in the village?" Hiruzen nodded. "What the hell? That guy's insane!"

"I think he knows that, Kiba-San." Shino replied as he pushed his sunglasses up his nose.

"That," Hiruzen began, standing up and facing the window behind his chair. "…is what happens when you survive some of the worst genjutsu known to shinobi kind back to back." He turned to look at Kurenai and continued. "Your sensei has more than likely told you about the hazards about genjutsu. Genjutsu can not only trick you, but hurt you-even kill you." He nodded towards the door. "Naruto was once one of this village's best operatives; right beside Uchiha Itachi; in fact, even stronger than Itachi…But; during a mission, he was captured by a group of S-Ranked nin from several small villages and tortured day and night for nearly a week. The mind can only handle so much before it breaks down."

"I-Is he s-safe to be around?" Hinata asked, her face full of fear. Hiruzen looked at her and sighed.

"Most of the time, yes…" He turned back towards the window and took a deep, calming breath. "…But there are times he gets out of control, or even reverts back to the way he was when he was in Anbu."

"…Why my Nee-Chan?" Kiba asked.

"Because," Hiruzen began, looking at the wild boy before continuing; "he listens to her."

"I saw that, Hokage-Sama." Kiba commented snappishly. "But why?" the elderly Hokage just shrugged his shoulders.

"I don't know." He replied. "I just wish he listened to me and his other minders like he listened to her though. It would certainly be a lot easier to make it through the week without him demanding for a mission left and right…Or stealing and ruining other people's things." He went back to his desk and pulled out a familiar looking scroll and tossed it at Kurenai. "Have fun."

"…That damn cat…"

So, yeah…Hopefully this will last farther than Kitty did. Then again, this story sort of has a plot…Which is how would the village fare throughout the Canon! Arcs and non-Canon! Arcs(meaning fillers and some of the movies) with an insane Naruto at the helm, rather than a stupid Naruto.

Naruto will still deal with the Akatsuki and Madara; however, it won't be like the Canon!, obviously.

I will be changing things here and there to suit my needs. Don't like it? Too bad. For instance, Naruto; being super strong, has techniques that no one else does, and I think that a few of you will be able to recognize what those are and where I gleamed them from. I'll mention where I got the technique too.

Now, I can't promise speedy updates, nor can I promise long chapters. I'll end a chapter where I feel like ending it, if it isn't long enough to suit your needs; them again, too bad. You'll either have to deal with it. Or, if you can't deal with that and feel like raging at me about chapter size, then go away. I don't need that kind of crap and I don't need you.

So, there you go; as blunt as I can be without swearing at you all.

P.S.: Here's a quick age chart:

Itachi:18
Naruto:17
Hana:17
Rookie Nine(Eight): 11-13