Disclaimer: Sadly, I own nothing Twilight:(
50 Ways for Emmett to Annoy his Family
Part One:
…A Few for Edward…
1. Ambush him late at night while wearing plastic fangs, a long black cape, and cry "I WANT TO SUCK YOUR BLOOD!!!!!"
2. Cover his piano in puppy dog stickers, and claim that they followed him home from school.
3. Scrape said stickers off of his piano, and then put them on his Volvo with Super Glue.
4. Prank call him, and ask him to come and join the dark-side.
5. Prank call him again, about 30 seconds later, and claim that he has Bella, and won't release her until he posts a video on you tube announcing that he is coming out of the closet.
6. Send said video to every girl in the country.
7. Prank call him one last time, and say that if he doesn't dance like a girl right now then the piano gets it.
"No!!!!!" Edward cries, attempting a Gwen Stefani dance. Emmett, using a Darth-Vader voice changer, laughs maniacally into the phone.
…A Few for Jasper…
8. Dress up in Rosalie's clothes, put on a long wig, follow him around, and continuously sing "Barbie Girl".
9. Sell all his Civil-War memorabilia on eBay, and replace them with pink stuffed animals.
10.Invite every girl at school to come, and tour his new and improved collection.
11.Say "Go ahead, Girlfriend!" to everything that comes out of his mouth.
12.Replace his shampoo with bright red hair-dye, and super glue.
13...then laugh, and take pictures of him when he gets out of the shower.
"EMMETT!" Jasper yells from upstairs, trying to pry his hands from his now red hair. Emmett comes up with a camera, and snaps pictures as Jasper screams profanities at him.
...A Few for Alice…
14.Steal all of her right shoes (why does everyone always steal the left ones?) and replace them with IOU's.
15. Convince her that the malls now have vampire detectors, and she is no longer allowed to shop.
16.Steal all of her credit cards
17….and then send a ransom note asking for $50,000.
18….When she doesn't send it to him, pretend to shred each one until she gives him the money.
"Alright, alright!" Alice cries in defeat. "I'll give you the money, just don't hurt Visa!" Emmett accepts the money, and gives her back her real, un-harmed credit cards. By the time Alice realizes what she has done, Emmett is already half way to a bank.
…A Few for Carlisle…
19.Steal all his medical supplies, and stash them in Edward's room.
20.Show up at the hospital, and claim to be the "new, and improved" Dr. Cullen.
21.Replace all his clothes with a Santa suit, and a chicken costume.
22.Burn said stolen clothes, and force him to wear either the Santa suit or chicken costume.
23.Ask him a new question every two minutes until he explodes.
24.Ask him to change every animal he happens upon into a vampire.
25….when he refuses, create them himself, and then proceed to lock said Vampiric animals in his study.
Carlisle walks into his study, and is stampeded by four vampiric squirrels, two vampiric bunnies, and five incredibly fast vampiric turtles. "EMMETT!" He screams. Emmett, who is watching from the hallway, smiles to himself, and continues toward his room.
Well, there you go. The first 25 ways for Emmett to annoy his family! I hoped you liked it!!!!
-Mel!